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for His Own Path

6/8/2015 c1 1Lazypersons
Great chapter was worthy the wait.

So I forgot to mention something in other facts for Travis but if you don't like it you don't have to include it. Ok so here it is, wile on a intelligents gathering missin he captured a fallen vandle and not only tourtured it for info about fallen activity but also about the fallen language which with the help of his ghost he can speak and translate most of it.

Like I said above if you don't like this you don't have to use it. And agin love the story
5/21/2015 c7 Lazypersons
Love the story and can't wait for the next chapter
4/16/2015 c7 2Madrugaur
Interesting to say the least, check the beginning. You use sapient when you may have wanted to use sentient or humanoid, if not well ignore this part
3/9/2015 c6 8ConEmber
Is Corde's team trying to make a war between the Fallen houses?
3/7/2015 c1 2Madrugaur
Oh, you also kinda screwed the Destiny timeline up, I'm not sure if you meant to do that or you just didn't know but the Traveler came first and then the mobs
3/7/2015 c6 Madrugaur
Intresting story so far, a little hard to follow but nothing major. Just try to make the words flow and use bigger ones. I noticed many times when you could have replaced a word with a bigger more descriptive one, also try to elaborate more add some back ground info.

Over and out,

Madrugaur
3/3/2015 c6 1Lazypersons
Don't know if u still need guardians but here's one
Name: Travis
Gender/Species: Male Human hunter
Age: 27
Appearance: Brown eyes, black hair, slightly pale(white),5'10"
Personality: quiet and keeps to him self mostly, but kind and hardworking.
Weapons: Thorn, has a katana under his cloak(for up close and personal), secondary weapon is a sniper
Other facts/info : where's a Cult/Trinary Star cloak that belonged to a friend before he died.
Rarely removes his helmet so few guardians know what he looks like.
3/3/2015 c5 8ConEmber
Queen of Kings. Enough said
3/2/2015 c3 ConEmber
Sushi is a very delicious name.
2/6/2015 c3 4Reilly.216
Loving the new addition, man! It's great how you're starting to incorporate more characters into the mix fro different perspectives. I love this story and I'm going to be waiting for the next update with eagerness. Anyway, I have an OC suggestion. Here goes;

Name: Snow
Race: Human
Class: Warlock
Sub-class: Void-Walker
Primary: Any Scout Rifle will do.
Backstory: As a scholar of the Traveller, Snow relies heavily on logic and principle when it comes to fighting. He'll systematically eliminate high-value targets before turning his attention to the more easily defeated enemies on the battlefield. Snow has always been very paranoid and rather shy when it comes to trusting others, as he prefers to perform missions alone, or with a trusted friend rather than a fierce warrior. However, if able to gain his trust, you've made an especially compassionate friend and loyal comrade, on the battlefield and in the Tower.
1/26/2015 c2 Reilly.216
Hey man, loved the cliffhanger. Great addition to the story.

Anyway, can you do me a favour? Can you make Entity a bit less of an asshole. I know he's a bit of a dick, but not that much! Haha! I should be updating the 'Soldier' story in a few days, hopefully by Friday, but I'll try to explain why Entity is so hostile to other people in one of the chapters.

Anyways, great chapter, if a tad short, but it definitely left me wanting more! Please update soon!
1/19/2015 c1 Pretty Good
This story was really good for your first time! It's interesting to see the day-to-day life on Mars. I only noticed a few grammatical errors, and some run-ons and fragments. A little background could really solidify the story. Keep up the good work!
1/19/2015 c1 Reilly.216
This is awesome, dude. I like the way that you're going to focus this on your OC from 'In His Footsteps'. I'm the guy who submitted Entity, and I was thinking that I might do an origin story a lot like this one. So thanks for pushing me to do it. Anyway, good luck with this story, I think you've got good things ahead of you. This is only the start.

By the way, you have my permission to incorporate Entity into your story if you want to, I don't mind at all. As long as I can use Raz on the odd occasion. :)

Good luck with the story!

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