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2/11/2015 c1 Guest
Loveeeeee the story. You're getting better.
And I know you only having spelling errors because you rushed it. Usually you're pretty good with them :)
2/4/2015 c1 Guest
At first I thought it was Naru wearing black, but it couldn't be since the summary said about brunette hair. So then I thought it was Mai who was visiting someone – visiting Gene. But then the last line changed my thoughts on that. It could have been Noll.
My brain
2/6/2015 c1 10NaginiFay
Nooooo! Why did you kill Naru!?
2/5/2015 c1 vampgirl1309
Nice! I liked it a lot! Also it was Mai at Naru's grave I believe. :)
2/4/2015 c1 Guest
Nooo! Did you just... Did you? O.O he's dead? Why? It just killed my heart. I hope you're aware.

P.S. This was great. D
2/4/2015 c1 115AmyNChan
I. AM GOING. TO CRY. NOW. *RUNS AWAY SOBBING*
2/4/2015 c1 28yonnee
At first, I thought Noll died, and yet you didn't really specify, did you? Mai might have just visited Gene, finally realizing it was him all along. (Or maybe I'm just a bit too hopeful? I actually like GenexMai, haha.)

I love the ambiguity and how you chose to use second person perspective. Your writing is good, and I see room for growth :D I'll love your oneshot even more if you added more description, more of Mai's emotions. Be careful with 'Your' and 'You're'! They're pretty confusing, huh?

xx
2/4/2015 c1 ErinAR
Your not in a happy mood eating pancakes, are you? Did you really kill Oliver? Or is my reading comprehension lacking?

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