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for Marriage Law Rejection Letters

9/20 c1 Guest
Honestly... where's the Rick and Morty crossover where Rick decides this whole mess is fucking with the multiverse entirely too much?
8/29 c140 4hnh058513
Chant lines up with Morrison and Keel,
8/29 c361 Lycaon
To dorkface umbitch who do you think you are you ugly pink toad licking bint?! it was you who had me exiled from britain after i became a werewolf and now you think you can order to return to marry some stranger? FUCK THAT! AND FUCK YOU! I am no longer a citizen of Britain so i am outside your jurisdiction, me and my pack are now living peacefully in America and we are staying! What's more you cock juggling thunder cunt we are no ordinary werewolves we are lycans and we will never bow to the demands of a backwoods society who refuses to move with the times you come anywhere near my territory and my pack will pick their teeth with your bones. UnCordially harry potter lord of the lycans
8/25 c12 50moonrose221
To whom it may concern,
Are you neanderthals think I'm going to listen to you then your stupider than I originally thought! My name is no longer Harry Potter. I was killed in a Death Eater attack after the war ended. A Japanese Wizard who was skilled with Technomancy, that is Magical manipulation of technology and yes it's real, created robots known as Vocaloids as part of a project for the Japanese Ministry of Magic. He embedded either created souls or transplanted souls in my case and turned us into musician's with full blessings from the Japanese Ministry of Magic. I am not human and now go by Len Kagamine. I can no longer sire children because I am once again a robot that runs similarly to a humans body but I am NOT human anymore and I am NOT going to England unless it's for a concert. And even then several Japanese Temple Guards, their version of Aurors by the way, will be our security detail.
Cordially, as I was taught to be polite,
Len Kagamine, Vocaloid Member.
8/7 c361 280FunahoMisaki
how about one where a female harry is Unohana from bleach or Isabella from Promised Neverland? Or it could be one where Harry is dead and married to Unohana...
8/5 c361 Nicreynard
To whom it may concern, Do you idiots really think you can just demand that i hand over my son and i'll obay as if i'm a dog? I AM A WARLORD! I make the demands and i demand that you fools leave us alone OR ELSE! I have better things to do then listen to the prattle of wizard who neglect physical training and i must say after the group you sent to kidnap him were disarmed by my son quite easily might i add they were easy to deal with, don't expect to see amy of them ever again i sold most of them to slavers and as for that ugly toad human hybrid in pink you sent well after she insulted and threatened my pregnant daughter-in-law i allowed my son to decide her fate and he sentenced her to be burned at the stake! by the time you read this letter she'll be a burned corpse if you don't want to suffer the same fate you will stay away from mossflower. obay or die! Signed Cluny the scourge adopted father of bolt scar (formerly known as harry potter).
8/4 c361 Nicholas
I've an idea for a rejection letter and it features some characters from the anime grimm's fairy tale classics, (Harry's note) To the ministry of morons who the hell do you think you are? I left your stupid society of stagnation and hypocrisy after you bastard's sent those fucking dementors after me then tried to give me a kangaroo court and now you expect me to go back and marry some shrivelled up ugly twofaced bint slag old enough to be my grandmother? NO FUCKING WAY IN HELL! I will never go back firstly because i'm no longer in your world and secondly i'm already married to a wonderful girl named Josephine and i would never give her up in a million years i'm staying in my new home and that's final! Insincerely harry james potter. Ps Don't expect to see umbitch or her goons again as some friends of mine are currently dealing with them. (Josephine's letter) To this ministry of another world that's got nothing to do with us HOW DARE YOU?! You have no right to command my husband to do anything he's seen as a hero by many people in our world and you have the gall to try and order him to marry someone you've chosen? What an outrage i'll never divorce him after he saved me from being murdered by an insane prince i fell in love with him and my brother like him too so you can take your demands and go jump in a lake signed mrs Josephine potter. (Beelzebub's letter) To the mortals of the wizarding world thank you very much for souls you sent to our world i finally got my promotion! No more being a low level demon for me! i've never seen my boss so happy before also unless you want to join these so called wizards in the underworld you leave harry alone it just so happens i owed him a favour that i was able to collect the souls of these so called aurors pray you don't see me soon signed Beelzebub. (Johnny wolf's letter) Dear idiot's your not taking harry without a fight! it was thanks to him that i was able to befriend little red riding hood and gain her grandma's forgiveness also why have you sent letters to me? i'm not a human so i can't mate with a human female i'll find my own mate when i'm good and ready and it will be of my choice not yours from johnny wolf. ps stop sending those stupid owls into my forest! I'm getting sick of owl meat and i'm still picking feathers from the last one out of my teeth! (puss in boots letter) To the british ministry of magic i am wrighting on behalf of my master count von heineken we decline and refuse your demands to send harry potter to you he told us all about your way of life and we find it disgraceful and disgusting that you would use such a magnificent young man as a scapegoat cordially out of good manner puss. Ps on a personal note your auror's were very tasty after harry turned some of them into mice. (Rumpelstiltskin's letter) deer fools are you people sick or something? A marriage law letter sent to my goddaughter? She's only a toddler for crying out loud! and you think you can just force the king and queen to agree to it just because you have magic? Well my magic is stronger as the fools you sent to kidnap her found out and they make wonderful golden statures outside my home! you try sending anymore of your so called army here again and i'll go to your world and turn all of you into chipmunks! Signed Rumpelstiltskin.
8/2 c35 Andy
How dare you? My sister is eleven years old, and she comes into my room, crying about a letter that says that she has to marry a thirty five year old man? One who was accused of rape, no less? What the fucking hell is wrong with you? I cannot believe that someone could be so cruel. I showed this to my mom, we're leaving, and not quietly.
Andy, Mia's brother.

(Totally random, if you want to add a last name that's cool. Please use it!)
7/30 c42 Eclectica737
I don't know how Goyle got this job but I never thought that he would actually have a conscience about this bullshit law. And whose smartass idea was it to pair a nine year old girl to a grownass man!? I mean WTF!?
7/30 c51 Eclectica737
Similar to Chap. 26 & I can't express how much I love the idea of the Laws of Arcadia to protect someone from forced contracts. I also love how Dumbasadoor & the Weasel's were punished for even trying. Could you have more letters that include the Laws of Arcadia?
7/30 c26 Eclectica737
One of the more interesting ones I've read. It's a good thing that she had such good protection against others trying to force her into contracts other than herself. They must be bat shit crazy to even think she would go along with this, marriage law or not, to one of her top enemies that helped to ruin her life, after Dumbasadoor, Trelawney, Snape, & Pettigrew of course.
7/29 c1 rand06901a
Even shitfaced drunk as well as being totally pissed AND on the rag there is no way in hell Hermione would be that inarticulate. You really need to rethink that one, 'cause ain't nobody gonna buy that for a dollar, eh?
7/9 c359 Cyril Kain
I see no difference between the two versions of the Wizengamot.

Actually, that's not true. Instead of them all acting like children, now some will literally fling poo around. That is all.
7/9 c344 Cyril Kain
Ouch, he sent Bitch to the HP universe? Hope she goes all Demon Goddess and wrecks the place.
7/9 c321 Cyril Kain
Seriously, Quatermass, it is Artoria, not Arturia. The official Fate Wiki even states it is Artoria.
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