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for Of Ghosts and Valkyries

11/1/2016 c43 13Writingaddict169
Absolutely incredible chapter as always! Never worry about uploading because your writing is always great. I can honestly imagine this being some crazy intense TV show that I watch religiously. Also, A for that Jelsa moment because that gave me life.
11/1/2016 c43 12snowfire12345
Miscarriage, I meant miscarriage. Stupid autocorrect.
11/1/2016 c31 snowfire12345
Speaking about songs, This is Gospel by Panic! At the Disco sums up the story for me. The first verse of the song is about the Ghost and the second about the citizens and Unity itself. At least in the point of view of the Ghost. Great, now I want it to be a chapter's theme song. Kiss, kiss, kiss! Half way through the story I knew you were going to concoct a scenario where two oral orifices will fluctuate against each other. So who failed Astrid or Elsa? Is dark!Elsa the one with 'ice blue eyes so pale they could easily have been two black dots in the sea of white'? Great chapter as always. You describe awkward Elsa well enough for me to conjure a clear image of it. Lastly, as a medical student, I'm concerned about Anna and her child's well being. Everybody thinks that the late months of pregnancy, as the others like to call it the heavily pregnant stage, are the most crucial. Actually all of those nine months are crucial but the first three months of pregnancy is when misconception is most likely because the fetus is developing all of the organs needed to survive the outside world and and the placenta is still not firmly attached to the wall of the uterus. How far is Anna in her pregnancy?
11/1/2016 c43 3TheOneAndOnlyFailWhale
Hey there, bud! I haven't written a review in a while, and I figured I should get back into doing it semi-regularly. While I haven't been reviewing, I HAVE been following this story rather obsessively, as it's one of my favorites. So, without further ado, here goes!

Your writing is still very descriptive and vivid, and your dialogue is still fantastic. The story still flows well, even hundreds of thousands of words into it, and that's remarkable. There are a couple of sticking points for me in this chapter, so lemme go over those quickly. First off, I'm having some problems with characterization. Jack and Elsa seem very flirty for people just starting to get along. I understand that they're both trying to knock down that barrier (and I also understand the pressure of the Jelsa fandom when it comes to their ship), but I still think the flirtiness is a bit too soon. Secondly, this chapter marks the second time that a hallucination/spirit has given someone exactly what they need to keep going. Personally, I felt that it was a copout even the first time you did it, and this instance was no different. I know that you're a strong writer and that you can write growth and development without the use of devices like that, so it makes me sad to see it being used twice. Unless this is some kind of weird hidden abnormal power, but even then it's a little shaky. That's pretty much it for the negatives.
I did want to point out one other positive before I closed out the review, which is the humor. The humor is still really great, one specific instance I wanted to mention being Jack's dialogue after the first fake kiss. That was great, I laughed out loud while I was reading it before class started.
So to close out this review before it gets grossly overlong, I just wanna say great job! Even 400 thousand words in, you're still doing a lot of things right. I look forward to the next one!
11/1/2016 c43 mellowfluffyangel
Beautiful chapter.
10/31/2016 c42 Guest
You did a really good job with making Anna a realistic character and I think the way she handled it (talking to Elsa and being honest about needing them) was really good :)
10/29/2016 c42 Guest
Oh my god! Jelsa is my life right now and so is Pitch and Merida, everything just feels right so far.
10/26/2016 c42 Polar Panda
After reading several of the other reviews and seeing their problems with Anna's character, I believe you have given them just the chapter they wanted. Had you just fixed Elsa and Anna's relationship right of the bat,it would have lost a little validity. My reasons being that in the real world, you can't just fix that much of a void in a relationship in an instant. I believe that you are making this fic very true to reality and I applaud you for it. The only issue I have with this chapter is that Elsa seams to have gone from total emotional control to giggling teen. I may be wrong but I thought I would mention it. Thank you for your continued writing and for continuing to respond to my reviews, it means the world to me. :)
For the Ghosts and Ghosts in training
Polar Panda
10/25/2016 c42 5Whimsical Acumen
Here's that review I said I was going to do and then life got in the way and ugh this week better be better ... anyhoo!

I won't go much into the AnnaxElsa section only because we've already talked that one, but I will say I like how you changed the ending and omitted the bit with Jack because honestly, it emphasizes their relationship all the more which is fantastic!

As for the other sections, well: I love how you've incorporated the same growth Elsa has in the original movie to here, with the braid and all that - super creative work there! And it's interesting to see how her passion? and focus on him, because she's so used to being obsessed with him, is now shifting to that of attraction of the sexual sort. Like, part of me wants to say, "gee, this is fast" but when I consider her hyper focus on him before and then it's like, "wait this guy I've been hunting and obsessing over is actually super hot and my sister's best friend and helps all these people and is actually kind of wonderful?"

Honestly didn't think Merida would be one who would get makeup. Also the makeup-user in me wants to point out that if he's only using one foundation, he's still going to look super pasty and not quite right. Needs some blush and contouring in there ;)

Definitely looking forward to and am curious about the next chapter where I'm assuming we're going to get a lot of Jack and Elsa goodness and I am super looking forward to it! x3 Happy writing
10/24/2016 c42 50Jpbake
With the chapter title letting it go I almost expected Elsa to finally unveil her ice powers to the Ghost and excepting herself as a abnormal and was mildly bummed that she is still fighting her true self. But I'm sure that will happen eventually, hopefully soon though, I really want to see Jack's reaction to Elsa being a abnormal.
It was nice to see Anna and Elsa finally talk. Even if Anna said she needed time it's obvious that they are making progress. Hopefully they both fully come to peace with the past and forgive each other soon. But progress is progress.
Oh and the bit with Merida and Pitch was hilarious.
Keep up the good work and update soon.
10/21/2016 c42 Aniza
Definitely. Today I said out loud that I was looking forward to the new chapter and it seems like the cosmos conspires on my favor. As always, awesome chapter. I'm glad you managed to find your way out of the rut. There must be many wonderful writers I have yet to read, but you are my favorite so far, and so is this story. Be proud, as I am sure many of us readers are proud of you!
10/23/2016 c42 5Fantasy OH YEA
Another Awesome chapter I cannot wait to see how this unfolds and A if there was a grade that I am certainly not qualified to give so keep up the stunning work thnx lots.
10/22/2016 c42 HornedGoddess
Ahh. The joy of showers. And Merida and Pitch interaction is wonderful. I'm really loving this! It's my favorite fic to have any of these characters. Thank you! I can't wait for Maleficent to (hopefully) make an appearance. P.S. You're wonderful!
10/22/2016 c42 12snowfire12345
That one shot, can you find a way to circumvent the Helsa? Please don't add another to the list of stories that will mess me up. Also I was inspired by your Broken fic (I still cry every time I read it) and I'm working on a fanfic. A Janna fanfic. In Elsa's POV. Jealous Elsa.
10/22/2016 c42 8OniNoKo
HE GAVE HER HIS SWEATER! Fine. One of his sweaters. BUT! :D

Okay, now that's out of my system.

I really didn't want this chapter to end. It was so much fun! I laughed hard while reading the part about Pitch's makeup attempt :D

Also, I'm happy that Anna made the first step towards fixing things with Elsa. It was about time she approached the issue. I mean, there's a lot for all of them to process and figure out, especially since so little time has passed since the Purge. But at least Anna hasn't lost all her love towards Elsa and acknowledges the fact that Elsa is trying to reconnect.

Psst, Anna totally called it, btw :D
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