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for Jana's Johto Journey

4/6/2015 c3 132signelchan
Jana fights two Leaders and gets two badges, has another rousing battle of curbstomping with her rival, and also falls down in the Burned Tower, with Nicholas and two stoners as witnesses. But, hey, she meets Suicune in the process of that ordeal, so maybe it wasn't a good "bad" thing to throw in there. She's got new Pokemon and a bit of a new perspective on the, er, lovely city of Ecruteak, plus she's got knowledge about Team Rocket that her mom doesn't seem to want her to have. All in all, a fairly eventful chapter in her life!

I just want to take this time to mention that I love inebriated Eusine a whole lot, and I love the whole "Ecruteak is for stoners" thing that you've made sure to include. There are some things that just don't make sense unless drugs are involved, and that man in his funny costume is one of them. I love that you break a bit from the game canon to add this humor to an otherwise pretty dry part of the game. And that's being said knowing that Suicune has butt ribbons. xD

Anyway, sorry for the lateness of this review! Hopefully the one-two punch I'm delivering here today will make up for that. :)

Signel
3/26/2015 c2 signelchan
There are two things I noticed as I read this chapter. One, holy cow you use Jana's name a lot in this fic. Two, the whole Azalea Town saga in the games is a lot longer than I think it is when it's written out in a fun story format. Neither of those are bad things, don't worry, just things I noticed. Don't take 'em personally.

However, do take it personally that you're great at turning something as dry as lame Rocket grunt battles into a fun experience to be had by those reading it. And you made everything that goes down there at Ye Old Slowpoke Welle less of a bore and more of a decent time. Still not the most exciting thing to happen, but hey, with the source material you're working with, there's not much excitement you could add without ruining the original intent. You did a great job at making Kurt more than just the balls guy who falls in a ditch, though, and that's freaking awesome. :)

Anyway, Jana's still got a long way to go, but she's making progress and she's going places. I'm excited for what comes next in her journey, and I'm also excited to see what else you manage to change into being more fun than the original version!

Signel
3/15/2015 c1 signelchan
I remember back when Jana was first created as a player character for your run-through of Crystal, and all of us in the group Facebook chat would pretend to "interact" with her while she was on her journey. She wasn't that great of a person, had a pretty terrible backstory that makes us both cringe when thinking about it, and she fell to the wayside when the group fractured into small pieces. But you let Jana live on in your heart, and we both knew that someday she would get her chance to have a great story to shine in.

And boy, does she have that story now. You're building her up to be an interesting character that does more than just follow the events of the game she's transplanted from. You've given her traits that no player avatar in the Pokemon universe would dare to have. Best of all, though, you've given her several somethings that make her unique, her journal being the most important one (because screw her father. Seriously, fuck that guy).

I don't really know if there's much more for me to say here, since this is the first chapter and I've told you my thoughts on Jana and her adventure many times in the past. Keep up the great writing, and keep adding your own flair to the game story we know so well!

Signel
3/14/2015 c1 Commander M
The name of Janna here is supposed to be Lyra and Nicholas name is supposed to be Silver. Also, do you plan on having Ash(Red) to appear here.
3/11/2015 c1 10ultima-owner
Weird cave girl is a meanie
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