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for We, Alone

3/6/2016 c25 god of all
Great chapter and story so far please continue this story soon.
2/15/2016 c24 tymofey
This story should be more popular..l
2/13/2016 c24 83Nemesis13
Thoroughly enjoying the story and loving Teacher!Neville, keep up the good work hope you update soon!
2/12/2016 c24 pawsrule
Good chapter! I'm not sure if they should trust Ron or not. Keep up the good work.
2/12/2016 c24 2mwinter1
Awaiting more.
1/28/2016 c23 Lirael Black
I'm loving this story. I love the characters (except for McGonagall going all manipulative. Not that it doesn't fit the story) , the plot and just everything. Always excited to get the email about the new chapter. Anyway, gonna stop gushing now and just say Great Job! Excited to read the next chapter. Also, I really hope Luna shows up at some point and that she isn't terribly/irrevocably destroyed/ damaged by the circumstances of this horrible world.
1/22/2016 c23 pawsrule
Nice update! I didn't mind the time sequence. Hope to read next chapter soon.
1/22/2016 c23 god of all
Great chapter and story so far please continue this story soon..
1/22/2016 c23 mwinter1
Awaiting more.
1/22/2016 c23 10Philosophize
It is a little confusing, but I was most confused by the shift from the flashback to his 16yo self to the rally than I was between the rally and training. The early flashback was good - it was a nice reveal of Harry's development and meeting with Hermione, but the shift to the rally was abrupt and the time spent at the rally was very short.

That said, I think that trying to do something like that is a good idea. Training is... boring. Spending lots of time on training slows a story down and isn't worth doing unless you can include important bits of character and/or plot development as well. In my story, I focused on Hermione's difficulty with learning how to deliberately hurt and even kill people. It was something she struggled with, especially as she learned she could cast lethal spells very well. So, "training" was more than just training.

If you don't have that, then you need to keep training time short. Intercutting training with glimpses of the future and flashbacks is good if you use that to, again, advance plot and/or character development. The elements you used here did so, but they were a bit abrupt - especially the one. I wonder if perhaps two are too many, especially in a chapter of this length.

A glimpse of the future which showed them realizing that there were dementors nearby which they'd have to face and spent a little time on their fears before going back to them learning about dementors and the patronus spell might have been smoother. There's a common theme, plus the training in the patronus is suddenly given a lot more weight given what we saw at the top. Tension is built even more if the first scene is the first fight with dementors, or at least the first fight involving multiple dementors, then we see how much trouble they had learning the patronus spell. Canon Harry did well with it, but you'd be showing us that your Harry is struggling, giving us real reason to wonder how he'll do in his first dementor fight.
1/18/2016 c22 20Gandalf's Beard
This is truly one of the best AU's I have read in quite some time. Almost perfect really (which isn't to say that it couldn't use a bit of an edit for typos... ;) ).

The only things which would make it perfect would be to remember to use the terms Mum and Mummy, instead of Mom and Mommy (that's a bit jarring to us Brits), and also to revise the section where you bring an obvious fanon trope like "magical cores" into things.

In any case, I love your characterisations of Harry and Hermione (and everyone else really). They're very credible as the same characters we fell in love with (or love to hate). The whole scenario arising from Dumbledore dying is very believable.

Great story!
1/18/2016 c22 5Man of Constant Sorrow
This is so amazing, it truly is a one of a kind story. So well thought out, such an interesting AU, this is an AU done right.

Can't wait to read more
1/6/2016 c22 2mwinter1
Awaiting more.
1/6/2016 c22 god of all
Great chapter and story so far please continue this story soon...
12/15/2015 c21 3BJH
It was interesting hearing about the Order from Neville's point of view. A good person but with only the Ministry's version of events.

I wonder what they will do.

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