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for Saving My Family: Exit Strategy Aftermaths

9/5/2022 c1 8EverFlawless
I think the only reason a lot of people are confused is cause there is no separations between the big monologues and the discriptions of those who are talking. It may seem to others you’re repeating. But all I got so far is that you’re trying to set the stage of what’s going to happen in your book. Anyone who’s seen charmed would love all the characters you’re presenting in the beginning. But would love for a fine tuning of discription and tone and foreshadowing words instead of big placed monologues. Please message me. I really want to help you with this. I’m not a beta, well I don’t know how to beta, but would love to help you. Im going to keep reading to see where this is going and then I will give you a full list of how I would have written this and then in hopes maybe I’m nice about it that you would come back to this story.
7/30/2022 c1 10thunderofdeath97
Honestly this was pretty ridiculous, convoluted, and really stupid. Very hard to follow, a lot of things don't make sense.
9/8/2021 c22 ChrisBiancaFan
Also Phoebe sollte sich jetzt erst recht mit Cole zusammen tun und ihre Schwestern bestrafen.
7/31/2021 c1 Guest
This chapter is so convoluted it is very hard to read.
Great story by the way
9/15/2019 c1 5booklover2314
I liked the premise, but the way it's written is very difficult to follow. The formatting is too tight and the dialogue debating when in time he's going back to has too many characters talking in the same scene and they constantly change and repeat things. I don't know when he went back to and who is alive. I don't know if I will continue with the rest of the story.
8/3/2019 c17 8PotterRathboneGreyFan
I like your stories but it seems like everything just keeps getting repeated over and over. It's difficult to keep up.
3/12/2019 c1 ThomasNealy
I was really excited about this story,but when I read it I was just confused. It is hard to tell who is talking for one. Their planning session is confusing and seems complicated for complicateds sake. And the whole show thing is confusing as well? Are you breaking the fourth wall? Is this some kind "the characters read/watch the story of them selevs" type story?
11/27/2018 c19 kalininanatay
Thanks it's an interesting story
11/18/2018 c1 1TheLoneHale
It's a great idea, But my brain hurts.
9/28/2018 c19 8PotterRathboneGreyFan
I love the ideas of your stories but I get so confused because everything is being repeated.
6/15/2018 c18 PotterRathboneGreyFan
Sorry spelled that wrong, 'rewrite'
6/15/2018 c18 PotterRathboneGreyFan
I love the plot, but it's really confusing to keep up. Don't be discouraged, but I think you need to either re site this you get a beta.
5/17/2018 c1 7Talhulla
The plot was good but it's too confusing and you give away all in chapter one.
If you do a rewrit i will read it but not this sorry
5/12/2018 c18 gabyhyatt
Im getting confused
2/19/2018 c2 Guest
You have some pretty good ideas in there but I'm sorry. This is giving me a headache. Maybe it's me . I hope this doesn't discourage you though. As a writer one can understand it takes a lot of work to get your story right and you already know how to make an interesting plot. It's the execution that's the problem. I've struggled with that also but trust me you can get past it. Don't stop trying is all I'm saying.
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