1/3/2017 c27 Tubafox
It's a wonderful story and a great plot but you are in great need of some kind of beta reader. Your sentence structure is often confusing, awkward, redundant, (sometimes a sentance is nearly backwards) and many of your verb tenses are incorrect. The work comes across as having been written by a non native speaker of English. If this is the case I do understand but still recommend a native speaker as a beta. I'll be keeping an eye on the story as the concept and plot are very good and quite interesting to follow.
But, again, the quality of your grammar is distracting and keeps one from completely enjoying the work.
Best wishes and good luck to you.

1/1/2017 c27 Master-Xavier
Ok, first things first, HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Now as for this chapter… there’s not much I can say, is just an info dumping chapter, those are necessary between major events to help pace the story, give some explanations to past events and foreshadow future ones, but they are not great to comment on with reviews because not much actually happens in them.

I do find unrealistic and a bit… distasteful that Molly Weasley told her daughter THROUGH HER ENTIRE CHILDHOOD to “Conquer” Neville, like, I’m not going to complain that’s not her canon self because you already shown you are willing to part with it, maybe it’s just me but I have a hard time believing that, I could believe she talking big about the boy-who-lived being one of his worshippers, and even asking her to catch his eye AFTER he was already friends with Ron, but telling her THAT through her childhood? I don’t know why but that feels wrong to me.

Then again that’s just my opinion and maybe you have a plan for it so I’ll wait what you have in store for us, and I can't wait to see how the diary will influence this very different reality, again I wish you a happy new year and hope yours is full of happiness and prosperity.

12/31/2016 c2 Smutley Do-Wrong
She had no intention to come back to the Dursley's house with a trunk full of magical books and devices. With her luck, her uncle would lock all her supplies in a cupboard until September 1st, which was out of the question.

What falls under what I call, "telegraphing canon". More reasonable, a "maybe", that IF at all possible (has enough money, inn, hotel, magical world as she knows she can't rent a regular room (muggle hotel) ).

Perhaps, particularly with French business. She might have (at least) asked (though you tied her up with Dumbledore guardianship shit) about attending a school in another country. Sheesh, you're saddling up femme Harry with terrible family rep. If not for the WTF, WHO are these folk, at the intro(freaking about a stolen philosopher's stone), I'd be lobbying for the girl as being THE CHOSEN ONE, the Neville deal, just a sneaky prophesy misdirect, Voldy not vanquished just blown up a bit. Imagine dumped by Dumbledore in Durskaban, the raiding of Potter heirlooms and assets, mob murdering her mum, James screwed over(innocent), Potter fortune bled out funding war effort, and years down the road, scum sheeple expect(demand) she "save them", vanquish Voldy.

12/31/2016 c1 Smutley Do-Wrong
There is one "Harry" still in the chapter, looking for his missing "tackle", perhaps.

The intro: other than Dumbledore, goblins, and Order of the Phoenix, it is all WhoTF are these characters. If this is some crossover, the "Exchequer" not some pulled out of thr ether, you might note it, otherwise readers I guess will assume, not knowing wtf the group is, is intended, a mysterious mystery.

12/31/2016 c27 1setokayba2n
Somehow I imagine this conversation...

"Dear Diary... The boy-who-lived is not making sense, I a 11 year old try to seduce him but he don't seem to fall to my beauty... What can I do?"

"Don't worry Ginny, I'm with you... Try to use a love potion, here is the recipe and if you have problems just ask your mom"

12/20/2016 c11 mckertis
This is chapter 11, and so far there's been two paragraphs at most with the LotR connection. That is false advertisement.

12/20/2016 c2 mckertis
"Quasi-instantly" ? It seems to me, you are afflicted with severe bouts of graphomania, my dear...