11/24/2015 c3 Happy Reader
I do hope you will continue writing this story, too many of good stories are left uncompleated ane forgotten. i wish you luck and good imagination so i can read more of this ) good luck
I do hope you will continue writing this story, too many of good stories are left uncompleated ane forgotten. i wish you luck and good imagination so i can read more of this ) good luck
11/25/2015 c3 pandapimpin
So... Is Hannah Shepard supposed to be Jane? Or is Jane really going to be 80ish when the reapers come around... I'm confused. That aside, knowing there are Uzumaki in the mass effect world does that mean there will be other clans out there due to his powers? And if that hold true.. I would be vary careful of what he makes into reality. A preemptive strike on all persons deemed a risk would be wise in almost all cases. Jack Harper, Danzo, The Flood... the flood alone scares the s*** out of me.
So... Is Hannah Shepard supposed to be Jane? Or is Jane really going to be 80ish when the reapers come around... I'm confused. That aside, knowing there are Uzumaki in the mass effect world does that mean there will be other clans out there due to his powers? And if that hold true.. I would be vary careful of what he makes into reality. A preemptive strike on all persons deemed a risk would be wise in almost all cases. Jack Harper, Danzo, The Flood... the flood alone scares the s*** out of me.
11/22/2015 c3 3Bolondka
The story is interesting...
... but the grammer and the fux ton of typos make my eyes bleed even though I'm not a native English speaker. It looks like something a 6 years old writes.
You should spend more time editing and spell-checking your story otherwise you just waste a fairly decent plot.
I gave up in the middle of the 3rd chapter. Fix it please and I'm sure more people will read it.
The story is interesting...
... but the grammer and the fux ton of typos make my eyes bleed even though I'm not a native English speaker. It looks like something a 6 years old writes.
You should spend more time editing and spell-checking your story otherwise you just waste a fairly decent plot.
I gave up in the middle of the 3rd chapter. Fix it please and I'm sure more people will read it.
11/20/2015 c3 Juvart24
It's a pretty good start. You need to go back and fix typo's and spelling errors,it can be a bit jarring to have stop and figure out what you ment not what was written.
It's a pretty good start. You need to go back and fix typo's and spelling errors,it can be a bit jarring to have stop and figure out what you ment not what was written.
11/14/2015 c3 Cf96
Cool
Cool
11/11/2015 c3 guestnobody
As short as this is right now, I'm still not bored reading it. :) Though my 'missing' review did show up, but only if people filter chapter 2 on the reviews. :/
Still definitely recommend JR's Troy Rising series, its a good read & well of ideas. Using redirected light from the sun to mine in space has been around since at least 2008 [called Optical Mining], though I found one reference from a conference in 1995. Its cheap, easy to replace, & greatly scalable. [which makes me wonder at the lack of use in scifi beyond copyright] While the Troy battlestations originate from long-standing ideas of using asteroids as colonies. [first showing up in fiction in Seetee Shock (1949) and Seetee Ship (1951)]
As short as this is right now, I'm still not bored reading it. :) Though my 'missing' review did show up, but only if people filter chapter 2 on the reviews. :/
Still definitely recommend JR's Troy Rising series, its a good read & well of ideas. Using redirected light from the sun to mine in space has been around since at least 2008 [called Optical Mining], though I found one reference from a conference in 1995. Its cheap, easy to replace, & greatly scalable. [which makes me wonder at the lack of use in scifi beyond copyright] While the Troy battlestations originate from long-standing ideas of using asteroids as colonies. [first showing up in fiction in Seetee Shock (1949) and Seetee Ship (1951)]
11/9/2015 c3 Guest
Some real fucked up punctuation in this chapter
Some real fucked up punctuation in this chapter
11/9/2015 c3 guestnobody
And now my review shows up... Reviewing as a Guest is seriously broken sometimes.
And now my review shows up... Reviewing as a Guest is seriously broken sometimes.
11/10/2015 c3 DeathSeeker96
Will the oc be a fighter like Shepard or will he be the leader of a private group.
Will the oc be a fighter like Shepard or will he be the leader of a private group.
11/8/2015 c3 guestnobody
Jane Shepard as an Uzumaki... makes a lot of sense when you think about it. Glad to know you'll add other series later! Thought of a few more, but my attempt at writing a second review for chapter 2 didn't work. The three I remember mentioning were Vanquish, Crysis, & Armored Core. [the first two as an outgrowth of developing nanites in the first place; can see the carnage a Nanosuit &/or the BLADE System can cause]
Jane Shepard as an Uzumaki... makes a lot of sense when you think about it. Glad to know you'll add other series later! Thought of a few more, but my attempt at writing a second review for chapter 2 didn't work. The three I remember mentioning were Vanquish, Crysis, & Armored Core. [the first two as an outgrowth of developing nanites in the first place; can see the carnage a Nanosuit &/or the BLADE System can cause]