Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for It's A Long Way To The Top (If You Want to Rock and Roll)

11/25/2015 c1 FelixNormandy07
I have done some deducing and I have some complaints. First of all, "I will spam and delete any negative comments," is what first caught my eye. No, I am not going to let something like that slide because (good) writers take criticism and negative comments and improve on them. What you have proven sir is that you CANNOT TAKE criticism or some may even see you as a sort of weak minded writer. You need to disprove and dislodge those accusations if they are in fact inaccurate. Another problem is the pace of this chapter (even chapter two was a bit slow paced). This made my friend and I bored within the first few minutes of reading. This problem goes hand-in-hand with the next problem, descriptions. Honestly some of them did not make me bored or lost (even some of the musicians) but most were unnecessary. These struck me as basically you showing off (no offense) and it completely derailed the plot for a good while and greatly confused me and my friend, Pete. For example when you cited Issei and Itchigo's influences (especially the former) struck me as you just showing off with most of those musicians, I'll safely assume, not many people on this website know at all. Also those kinds of descriptions are littered throughout the first chapter. Another thing was how you threw higher English at seemingly random points in the story and honestly to me the whole Issei being really perverted wierded Pete and I out but to be honest, we have not seen much of Highschool DxD. BUT I do like the flow of the story when I am not assaulted with descriptions and the story, if fixed, can hold some potential. In conclusion, I will assume you are a highschool student who wants to start a band and this is kind of an outlet or a fantasy of how you want your band to be/what you expect to face/what could have happened but without further adieu, goodluck with the story and your band. PS thank you in advance for not taking the criticism and spamming and deleting this comment. There's no harm done to me (I won't cry a river if you delete this) but you do not get what you need to improve and be better. PPS I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings, I just know too many people who are afraid of one negative/criticizing mark (comment) and are a bit self-centered.
11/16/2015 c1 Mugetsu1996
Hmm very nice I'm interested. If you do pairings can it be issei with orihime and Ichigo with Rias so it can mix? Also one of the rare stories that I like with issei in it
17 « Prev Page 1 2

Desktop Mode . Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service