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9/2/2019 c5 Emporer Bloodfire
falling in 'love' with some one night stands is kinda pathetic.
8/20/2019 c1 11Worldmaker
Okay, constructive criticism time.

You need to work on your use of grammar.

You need to read your own prose and make sure you're not using the wrong words, or are forgetting to include words, or are otherwise constructing sentences that just don't make any sense and force the reader to figure out what you are trying to say.

You need to learn proper punctuation a bit better than you have.

You need to learn not to rely on exposition so much. Show, don't tell.

You need to not use Mary Sue characters.
9/15/2018 c4 SmartBrute
That flashback brought me to tears, you are an amazing writer my thanks.
7/9/2018 c7 1Araytigre
Sadly, can't help you about the Valkyrie, I barely remember seeing the Movie, so there you go. I have been enjoying reading this story, and it's been fun. I like how you've spliced the two genre together, and have returned Magic to the Universe, which also includes several Alien Races (some of which have blended with the Humans, particularly as we know, the Vulcans, and now Klingon). We have learned that there may have been Magic on Kronos, even if it wasn't seen in a good light at the time, so it would be interesting to see what information survived the destruction of Vulcan, and what their History of Magic was. I noticed that Harry's kids managed to apperate into the bedroom, even after he had warded it, even if it was accidental magic. Thank You. TTFN
4/14/2018 c1 Guest
Couldn't read more than a few paragraphs. If Harry and the magical world went through what you just wrote they would of created diseases to wipe out the muggles, they would of imperiused world leaders to use nukes, they would of done anything but die passively. It's their greatest fear come to life, after Khan they would of done anything and everything possible that Greene would never have come about...
4/14/2018 c7 2Tolotos
hmm, i'm not sure over the size, my best Estimation of the dimensions is length: 50 meters, max. width: 20 meter and high ca. 7 or 8 meters

and the weapon capabilities... the valkyrie was described as a freighter and i recognize from the movie only a single laser cannon
3/14/2018 c5 Guest
I really don't see who Khan is such a threat. Originally how did they even find the magical world? and given that they don't have magic and Harry does, why the hell did he do the stereotypical movie idiocy of resorting to a fistfight when he should have just AK'd Khan and had done with it.

With Starfleet-propper knowing Khan is still alive, shouldn't they have put out a BOLO or something on Khan, they know what he looks like and we have the software to age a photo of someone now so it shouldn't be a problem for the Federation.

Also, since Khan is over a century old I really doubt he would be a physical threat top Harry or his family in the slightest, so when you inevitably have it degrade to a stupid fistfight again, Harry better win VERY quickly.
3/14/2018 c4 Guest
Who moved Hagrid's grave from Godric's Hollow to Hogwarts?
9/24/2017 c6 K
I love it, hope there is more, I absolutely howled with laughter at the marauders being slapped upside their heads.
9/6/2017 c6 erik
An entertaining story, well done and thank you.
8/26/2017 c6 1Raven of the Whiplash
This is a really good story. It flows really well and the plot is really engaging. This is the second time Ive read it! I hope the next chapter comes out soon!
3/9/2017 c4 Guest
Ok, I get done crying from the reunion scene and think that there is no more crying from this chapter and then Hedwig shows up, waahhh!
3/9/2017 c4 Guest
Holy crap! That reunion scene was a tearjerker but so well written.
3/6/2017 c6 2ArthurShade
Amazing story looking forward to the next chapter
2/18/2017 c1 Stratos263
Wow hell of a way to start
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