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1/14/2017 c1 Guest
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1/14/2016 c1 19dolphinrain
Nice short story. Your writing is good. Ignore the nasty trolls infecting the Lost World. Ignore their comments as the sewer water it is.

It's nice to see a new writer and new story placed with courage in the face of all the bullies. Thank you for this lovely story.
12/23/2015 c1 10TLWROX
Sequel please!
12/22/2015 c1 33Gemini Explorer
This is a good story. I enjoyed it. It is not quite perfect, as a point or two may confuse some who read in haste. Look:

We thought our watchdog might want breakfast." Needs the quotation mark in front of the sentence. Just a typo error, I'm sure, and one that I've found in my own fics, sometimes, alas, after I can no longer edit them.

Being a "straight" man, I am probably not as versed in subtle shades of color as are women, usually more attuned to fashion in its considerable nuances. But when I checked, I found that "lavender" was shown as a shade of basic violet. I've always thought of Marguerite's blouse as being lavender. I thought that violet was usually a shade darker. But a color chart on the Net showed several variances that can pass as either hue. The Wisteria tree is one of those colors, as is the flower known as a violet, presumably the defining shade of "violet." So, I learned a bit about colors...

Those of us with military backgrounds may initially think that you had Roxton sleeping while on watch. Those who rapidly skim the story may make that error. On closer examination, he was just tired and looked to be sure that his rifle was at hand if needed. He wasn't on actual sentry duty; was just resting in his chair for awhile before probably intending to go up to bed soon. He drifted off to sleep instead.

One hopes that you meant that Marguerite was willing to fulfill his dreams after encountering his "violet " question of the new day. Of such thoughts are masculine fantasies sometimes composed...But had you moved the couple to her room and had her remove that violet blouse, you'd have to settle for a Mature rating for the tale, eh?

One hopes that you will write a Part 2 to the story, rated Mature, in which John does indeed undo the buttons on that blouse, whether it's violet, lavender, or whatever shade. I'd read it.

You spell and punctuate better than some "authors" here, and tell a nice tale. Please write more. There aren't enough good TLW fics being written these days.
12/20/2015 c1 jag389
nicely done. glad someone is still written lost world stories. hope you write more.

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