for The Lost Tale1/13/2016 c8 Tg123455
I like that this chapter started out with a fake out (dream sequence); it drew on Rhys' aforementioned fear of dreaming and nightmares.
I loved how excited Rhys was to be transformed back into a sorcerer! No one can blame him for being so happy to be turned back into his native species. I also liked how Addie snagged herself a dancer's outfit for Rhys' enjoyment, haha.
I like that this chapter started out with a fake out (dream sequence); it drew on Rhys' aforementioned fear of dreaming and nightmares.
I loved how excited Rhys was to be transformed back into a sorcerer! No one can blame him for being so happy to be turned back into his native species. I also liked how Addie snagged herself a dancer's outfit for Rhys' enjoyment, haha.
1/13/2016 c7 Tg123455
Rhys' transformation was an unexpected twist! His freak out when he realized he was no longer a sorcerer was enjoyable and believable.
The memory sequences were absolutely heartbreaking! I love how you've built on the moments mentioned in the chapter regarding Rhys' backstory in "Twist and Twine." Rhys faced a lot of tragedy in his early years despite having such a loving family situation. As for Addie's sequence, I love how it further developed her father's character and made her miss him more, likely in a way that she wouldn't have not that many years before. I also like how well you've drawn on the big Lionel reveal in "Twist and Twine" and have established a deeper connection between Addie and her father, especially now that Addie has succeeded her father as sovereign and better understands the stresses and responsibilities he faced in life. Also, Marid conjuring apparations in the form of Lionel and Rhys' mother was cruel and heart wrenching.
Rhys mentions that Myra's rampage against the humans now made sense to him, given her history, but I'm annoyed that he doesn't hold the masters accountable for abandoning her and leaving her without options. That said, Myra did over do it in her vengeance.
I like that Kumal and the desert dweller were tied to Marid. The desert dweller had a much more ominous presence than Kumal did so I expected her to be tied to Marid. I like how you through the reader off of Kumal's true allegiance by having him take on a similar role to the one Rhys took in the book. For example, the scene in which he saves Rhys from the mirage that took Matilda's form, provided some information, and then flew off.
I liked that Marid's introduction had him killing off his minion; it really solidified the type of character Marid is, that is, pretty nonredeemable.
Rhys' transformation was an unexpected twist! His freak out when he realized he was no longer a sorcerer was enjoyable and believable.
The memory sequences were absolutely heartbreaking! I love how you've built on the moments mentioned in the chapter regarding Rhys' backstory in "Twist and Twine." Rhys faced a lot of tragedy in his early years despite having such a loving family situation. As for Addie's sequence, I love how it further developed her father's character and made her miss him more, likely in a way that she wouldn't have not that many years before. I also like how well you've drawn on the big Lionel reveal in "Twist and Twine" and have established a deeper connection between Addie and her father, especially now that Addie has succeeded her father as sovereign and better understands the stresses and responsibilities he faced in life. Also, Marid conjuring apparations in the form of Lionel and Rhys' mother was cruel and heart wrenching.
Rhys mentions that Myra's rampage against the humans now made sense to him, given her history, but I'm annoyed that he doesn't hold the masters accountable for abandoning her and leaving her without options. That said, Myra did over do it in her vengeance.
I like that Kumal and the desert dweller were tied to Marid. The desert dweller had a much more ominous presence than Kumal did so I expected her to be tied to Marid. I like how you through the reader off of Kumal's true allegiance by having him take on a similar role to the one Rhys took in the book. For example, the scene in which he saves Rhys from the mirage that took Matilda's form, provided some information, and then flew off.
I liked that Marid's introduction had him killing off his minion; it really solidified the type of character Marid is, that is, pretty nonredeemable.
1/8/2016 c6 Tg123455
I liked that Rhys is finally the one tricked by a specter/mirage! Addie has fallen prey to them far too often. I also liked that he missed the same detail that Addie had in the book (the fact that Addie was wearing the magic cloak and should not be able to be seen by anyone but dragons and specters.) I liked the extra details you included to differentiate mirages from specters such as the paralysis they cause in their victims as well as the far more difficult tell of not having blood versus specters who don't leave footprints.
Between the freak spider, the ababil attack, and Kumal's betrayal, this was a really action packed chapter, maybe the most action oriented of any of the chapters I've read that you've written. I liked the argument that surrounded the spider attack - it was awful and petty, but I understand Addie's frustrations. Again, I really like how well you've captured the dynamic of a couple who has been together a long time (and gone through a lot). They know each other very well (the good AND the bad in each other) and often argue over minor things that they have argued about a lot before. I'm sure this wasn't the first time Addie got mad at Rhys for not thinking something completely through and how this argument turned into an argument larger than the events that caused it. I also liked how, as soon as they were in danger, the argument ended and they were completely on the same team. Rhys' regret that their (possible) last interaction before the (potentially) fatal attack was negative was heartbreaking.
I like that your Rhys still practices his scene making abilities with clouds and now earth. I also like that he still cannot to do himself justice in his representation of himself.
I liked that Rhys is finally the one tricked by a specter/mirage! Addie has fallen prey to them far too often. I also liked that he missed the same detail that Addie had in the book (the fact that Addie was wearing the magic cloak and should not be able to be seen by anyone but dragons and specters.) I liked the extra details you included to differentiate mirages from specters such as the paralysis they cause in their victims as well as the far more difficult tell of not having blood versus specters who don't leave footprints.
Between the freak spider, the ababil attack, and Kumal's betrayal, this was a really action packed chapter, maybe the most action oriented of any of the chapters I've read that you've written. I liked the argument that surrounded the spider attack - it was awful and petty, but I understand Addie's frustrations. Again, I really like how well you've captured the dynamic of a couple who has been together a long time (and gone through a lot). They know each other very well (the good AND the bad in each other) and often argue over minor things that they have argued about a lot before. I'm sure this wasn't the first time Addie got mad at Rhys for not thinking something completely through and how this argument turned into an argument larger than the events that caused it. I also liked how, as soon as they were in danger, the argument ended and they were completely on the same team. Rhys' regret that their (possible) last interaction before the (potentially) fatal attack was negative was heartbreaking.
I like that your Rhys still practices his scene making abilities with clouds and now earth. I also like that he still cannot to do himself justice in his representation of himself.
1/8/2016 c5 Tg123455
I liked the book reference regarding the sorcerers' philosophy on quests as well as how frustrating such a philosophy can be when you are looking for direction.
The desert dweller was an interesting, albeit awfully convenient character for Rhys and Addie to run into. Rhys and Addie were awfully lucky that this stranger happened to have an item that fulfills one of their greatest desires (to be able to speak with their children). I think they trusted her way too easily. Also, I really liked her ominous comment of "Marid will find you " and how well it ties in with the aforementioned sorcerer quest philosophy.
I hate to admit how familiar Rhys and Addie's flight direction argument was. I am guilty of acting like Addie and assuming that my husband should know what I want to do and act accordingly. It's silly situation that happens a lot more often than it really should.
Poor Rosie! That has to be the most awkward (and mortifying) parent/child encounter and the last chapter had Addie and Rhys' sex life brought to her father's attention.
Also, of course Rhys missed out on an apprentice ceremony. Those things always have the worst timing. I can only imagine what the masters' comments will be the next time Rhys shows up to the citadel.
I liked the book reference regarding the sorcerers' philosophy on quests as well as how frustrating such a philosophy can be when you are looking for direction.
The desert dweller was an interesting, albeit awfully convenient character for Rhys and Addie to run into. Rhys and Addie were awfully lucky that this stranger happened to have an item that fulfills one of their greatest desires (to be able to speak with their children). I think they trusted her way too easily. Also, I really liked her ominous comment of "Marid will find you " and how well it ties in with the aforementioned sorcerer quest philosophy.
I hate to admit how familiar Rhys and Addie's flight direction argument was. I am guilty of acting like Addie and assuming that my husband should know what I want to do and act accordingly. It's silly situation that happens a lot more often than it really should.
Poor Rosie! That has to be the most awkward (and mortifying) parent/child encounter and the last chapter had Addie and Rhys' sex life brought to her father's attention.
Also, of course Rhys missed out on an apprentice ceremony. Those things always have the worst timing. I can only imagine what the masters' comments will be the next time Rhys shows up to the citadel.
1/8/2016 c4 Tg123455
I loved, loved, loved the flashback scene! It was sweet, sexy, and mortifying. It was a treat to to read a scene so early into Rhys and Addie's marriage (post-honey moon) where Rhys and Addie have been together long enough that they (Addie) are more comfortable with each other, but everything is still new and exciting. The trek (and later tryst) to the Lake is such a classic new couple thing to do. I remember when my husband and I started dating we would have similar adventures all the time :)
One of my favorite parts of the scene was Bella's moment of recognition when Rhys' comment fully registered. She was so upset! As for her escalation of the issue to the king, what am embarrassing situation for all involved. I felt so embarrassed on Addie's behalf. No one wants to have that conversation (or anything) with their parent! Another of my favorite moments in the scene was when Lionel alluded to his past ventures to the lake with his late wife. So awkward! Also, great job on that "Homely Truths" quote.
I really liked your attention to detail concerning appropriate desert wear. Having the characters switch into environment appropriate clothing is a detail many others would have left out.
Finally, I liked that the final scene includes Meryl and Drault. They provided a nice (and interesting) backstory for the adventure. I also liked the callback to "Twist and Twine" with Meryl's remark that "suffering builds character"
I loved, loved, loved the flashback scene! It was sweet, sexy, and mortifying. It was a treat to to read a scene so early into Rhys and Addie's marriage (post-honey moon) where Rhys and Addie have been together long enough that they (Addie) are more comfortable with each other, but everything is still new and exciting. The trek (and later tryst) to the Lake is such a classic new couple thing to do. I remember when my husband and I started dating we would have similar adventures all the time :)
One of my favorite parts of the scene was Bella's moment of recognition when Rhys' comment fully registered. She was so upset! As for her escalation of the issue to the king, what am embarrassing situation for all involved. I felt so embarrassed on Addie's behalf. No one wants to have that conversation (or anything) with their parent! Another of my favorite moments in the scene was when Lionel alluded to his past ventures to the lake with his late wife. So awkward! Also, great job on that "Homely Truths" quote.
I really liked your attention to detail concerning appropriate desert wear. Having the characters switch into environment appropriate clothing is a detail many others would have left out.
Finally, I liked that the final scene includes Meryl and Drault. They provided a nice (and interesting) backstory for the adventure. I also liked the callback to "Twist and Twine" with Meryl's remark that "suffering builds character"
1/4/2016 c3 Tg123455
King Salah is such a scumbag! I can't stand him and I can perfectly imagine what it would be like to be in a room with him and have to interact with him - it makes my skin crawl! I love how much Rhys can't stand him and how jealous he got, especially since he knew he had nothing to worry about. Rhys' reaction to Salah's dancer outfit remarks was fantastic! On that note, I loved how Rhys absentmindedly stroked Addie's leg during the dancer's performance and imagined her in a similar outfit. My husband has done similar things to this in the past like whenever we pass a lingerie display at the mall, haha.
I also liked the explanation for Salah's behaviors in the flashback of "Twist and Twine". His threats were the understandable, but misguided follies of a young king.
The beauty treatment scene was hilarious! I would have been so annoyed at Rhys had I been Addie. He couldn't stop complaining about relatively minor things! I really enjoyed the extra, interesting details like how Rhys does like having his feet touched which makes sense considering that sorcerer feet are practically just for show.
Finally, I love reading the intimate scenes between Rhys and Addie. They were wonderfully done and capture, so far, how good this trip has been for their relationship. Both characters read more relaxed than they did in the previous chapters. They both really needed to get away from their work and home and spend some time together without the pressures of every day life!
King Salah is such a scumbag! I can't stand him and I can perfectly imagine what it would be like to be in a room with him and have to interact with him - it makes my skin crawl! I love how much Rhys can't stand him and how jealous he got, especially since he knew he had nothing to worry about. Rhys' reaction to Salah's dancer outfit remarks was fantastic! On that note, I loved how Rhys absentmindedly stroked Addie's leg during the dancer's performance and imagined her in a similar outfit. My husband has done similar things to this in the past like whenever we pass a lingerie display at the mall, haha.
I also liked the explanation for Salah's behaviors in the flashback of "Twist and Twine". His threats were the understandable, but misguided follies of a young king.
The beauty treatment scene was hilarious! I would have been so annoyed at Rhys had I been Addie. He couldn't stop complaining about relatively minor things! I really enjoyed the extra, interesting details like how Rhys does like having his feet touched which makes sense considering that sorcerer feet are practically just for show.
Finally, I love reading the intimate scenes between Rhys and Addie. They were wonderfully done and capture, so far, how good this trip has been for their relationship. Both characters read more relaxed than they did in the previous chapters. They both really needed to get away from their work and home and spend some time together without the pressures of every day life!
12/30/2015 c2 Tg123455
I liked the mention of the perpetually broken tower door! We all have one of those things that we keep meaning to fix, but never actually do.
I also like the idea of a solo getaway for Rhys and Addie to go on that, of course, gets out of hand. While I agree with Rhys that Addie's way of obtaining said trip was flawed, I admit that, if in her shoes, I would have done the same thing. Better to ask forgiveness than ask permission! Also, those advisers sound like a piece of work (very similar to what I envision advisers to be like); I'd be tired of dealing with them too.
The misunderstanding with the merchant was fantastic. It reminded me a lot of the scene in Aladdin when Jasmine goes to the bazaar. The combo of her sheltered life as a princess, now queen, and the language barrier is not a very good one for Addie.
I liked the mention of the perpetually broken tower door! We all have one of those things that we keep meaning to fix, but never actually do.
I also like the idea of a solo getaway for Rhys and Addie to go on that, of course, gets out of hand. While I agree with Rhys that Addie's way of obtaining said trip was flawed, I admit that, if in her shoes, I would have done the same thing. Better to ask forgiveness than ask permission! Also, those advisers sound like a piece of work (very similar to what I envision advisers to be like); I'd be tired of dealing with them too.
The misunderstanding with the merchant was fantastic. It reminded me a lot of the scene in Aladdin when Jasmine goes to the bazaar. The combo of her sheltered life as a princess, now queen, and the language barrier is not a very good one for Addie.
12/30/2015 c1 Tg123455
Yay! I'm so glad that this story is finally posted :)
It was a great choice to use Addie's miscarriage from the last story as a starting point for this one. "Twist and Twine" briefly mentioned how hard and upsetting the miscarriage was for both Addie and Rhys, but I like how realistically you've portrayed the lasting effects of it over a year, in story, later. Addie's heartbreak over her lady-in-waiting's childbirth twisted my heart strings!
I love how well you've written a couple who has spent over 15 years together, especially the sex element. Of course, Rhys would not fall prey so easily to Addie's seduction tactics at this point! I've found that my husband is immune to my seduction tactics as a means of distraction and inducement after only 2.5 years together, haha.
I also really like how you've handled the subtleties of Addie's change in status and what that means for her and Rhys' life. Addie's more overworked, stressed, and demanding than she's ever been in her life. They obviously still love each other very much, but their is tension - they still haven't fully adjusted. I love how realistic your portrayal of them is.
I'm so glad you've written this Rhys and Addie focused tale!
Yay! I'm so glad that this story is finally posted :)
It was a great choice to use Addie's miscarriage from the last story as a starting point for this one. "Twist and Twine" briefly mentioned how hard and upsetting the miscarriage was for both Addie and Rhys, but I like how realistically you've portrayed the lasting effects of it over a year, in story, later. Addie's heartbreak over her lady-in-waiting's childbirth twisted my heart strings!
I love how well you've written a couple who has spent over 15 years together, especially the sex element. Of course, Rhys would not fall prey so easily to Addie's seduction tactics at this point! I've found that my husband is immune to my seduction tactics as a means of distraction and inducement after only 2.5 years together, haha.
I also really like how you've handled the subtleties of Addie's change in status and what that means for her and Rhys' life. Addie's more overworked, stressed, and demanding than she's ever been in her life. They obviously still love each other very much, but their is tension - they still haven't fully adjusted. I love how realistic your portrayal of them is.
I'm so glad you've written this Rhys and Addie focused tale!