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9/26/2022 c5 harry uzumaki
What happened to Mission’s brother?
9/11/2022 c23 Neotono
This story must only have a maximum of around 5 chapters left and thats being generous. It's a shame that I doubt it will be finished since its been over a year since the last update.

Harry soon forgot about his former apprentice though, you did the same thing with Daphne in Blood Stained. You build up a side character for ages just to forget about them in the end.
8/28/2022 c23 Fallen Gluttonous Angel
Really good sw ff hope you get new ideas and motivation for this ff. I would really like to read more og it
8/16/2022 c4 EternalAnglo94
Wait so Harry didn't even get the details from these people about the mission until now?!
For god sake man that doesn't make any sense I had thought that it had simply happened off screen or something why would Harry agree to join them for a mission with no details and no payment?
8/16/2022 c3 EternalAnglo94
I still don't get why Harry/Thanatos has joined them
Why did he ask why they would want him to join them instead of asking why he would want to join them meaning what does he get out of this?

He basically just left with the first group that asked without any reason to trust them or even a damn payment?

This has broken the immersion of the story it feels so very silly
8/16/2022 c2 EternalAnglo94
Umm why would Harry join them? he has no real reason to do so he could easily pay for a lift of the planet to somewhere else

Surely Harry would of asked for payment I mean is he just giving away his services now? I don't get it? it's rather silly and extremely forced he didn't even need to be convinced he was just like "Ok sure I'll go with you despite having no reason to do so"

Also his alias did you mean to call him Thanatos rather than Thantos?
8/14/2022 c12 Difdi
You have a recurring typo in this chapter and others. Where you should have written “through” you wrote “threw” instead. The two are homonyms, words that sound alike but are spelled differently, with very different meanings.
8/13/2022 c8 Difdi
You have a recurring typo in the story. When Harry first called himself Thantos, I assumed it was just a made-up alias. Then in this chapter you specified that he was using a name of Death as his own, which made the typo clear. It’s spelled Thanatos, not Thantos.
8/13/2022 c2 Difdi
If Harry is on Nar Shadaa, then Death is wrong about the local money being credits. Hutts use peggats instead - it’s why Qui-Gon and Queen Amidala had so much trouble getting spare parts on Tatooine, they only had credits and the locals only used peggats. Likewise, a bounty posted on Nar Shadaa wouldn’t pay out in credits either, it would be peggats instead;
8/11/2022 c23 Guest
Great story sad to see it will not likely be finished but that’s fine I look forward to reading more of your stories
8/8/2022 c1 Bluenait
how stupid and unsatisfying how Dumbass died and the Potters and the Dursleys
8/7/2022 c23 1Gresleg
Read your story over the weekend it was great thanks for sharing your take on this crossover probably top 5 on this site can't say for sure but I just like a bit more lemon in my stories otherwise probably top 3. I'm going to start your witcher/hp crossover next week because I enjoy your writing style and lack of mistakes.
8/2/2022 c7 frisbeeg70
Did everyone forget about fiendfyre? Seems like that should at least have been tried on the Star . Not saying you don't have reasons but at least they're not showing in the story. Harry doesn't seem to be using much in the way of magic other than skills that copy Jedi abilities or a handful of basic skills such as aparition.
8/1/2022 c1 Guest
Why is the whole WBWL thing even there? It didn't seem to change or add anything to the story.
5/23/2022 c2 pedrokotii
I hear you are quite the bounty hunter around here. What would you think about joining my ships crew?" Kale asked Harry kindly. Harry looked surprised by the offer then looked at Kale suspiciously.

"Why would you want that?" Harry asked.

Eh, according to the characterization of this Harry so far, I'd expected that he'd ask: "Why would I want to do that?" - he had no reason to be friendly with a stranger, he'd been a bounty hunter for a short while already and Bastillia had already managed to make a bad first impression, so where were demands for compensation?

After all, this Harry was not supposed to be a hero, so why accept a random quest or worry about opinions of people he'd only just met?

It threw me for a loop, I'll admit. I can follow Doylist reasoning, but the Watsonian escapes me.
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