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7/31/2021 c33 Guest
We are now 3 years past the last update. Can we get an update on the story’s progress or just an update on how YOU are?
7/24/2021 c15 WandersAway
wait how is ruby gonna go to beacon when torchwick is gone?
7/4/2021 c25 CMDR Kai
Hmm, I wonder if Jaune can make nukes. It seems like Atlas is being naughty with a ripoff Spartan program, and they need to be disciplined. A few HAVOK tactical nuclear weapons should do the trick. They’re literally football nukes too, so sneaking them in wouldn’t be an issue.
7/1/2021 c33 Reader
Wow, that was a trip! Some enemies were weaker and stupider and the power balance were somewhat more skewed than I expected but this fanfic were still good! Too bad the fanfic stopped, though I think it's because the chapter size were growing too big. Around 10k each chapter should already be long enough.
6/27/2021 c24 Reader
Defensive-only Gamer's Mind that will leave completely vulnerable to your emotional and hormonal mood-swings? Oookaayyy... Only if you wouldn't be seen by dangerous characters that have seen your calmness as a part of your persona. And that you wouldn't see any other dangerous characters that can easily read and evaluate micro expressions that many Hunters and Huntresses would surely be capable of. So honestly, that feature is clearly a nerf, a weakness, if used outside of selective interactions with his most trusted allies.
6/26/2021 c20 Reader
Usually, one can easily Load Save to undo all (or at least most) of the f*cked ups that happened in Atlas. That's the lifeline feature there. Memory loss after Loading? Complete memory loss would make Load obsolete because the Gamer would just keep Reloading due to repeat actions. And any other penalties should still be much better than letting the world (Atlas, Ozpin, Cinder, AND Salem) know about Shiro:
* He can somehow sneak the whole ship into a high security level site and was just found out after the ship had built up speed flying away from the site.
* Duplicating and upgrading Penny, showing that he had previously gotten Penny's blueprints and can actually built one. And using the exact same design as the original would be interpreted as his marketing. In the future, people would easily blame him when bad things related to technology happens, and every bad guys like Cinder will seek to exploit it now that they know he can do it.
* Control the Grimms. Ozpin and his inner circle would connect that with Salem, while Salem would become VERY interested which will lead to disaster this early in the game.
* Sanguine might not be captured in camera but people has definitely known about spirits and can analyze the fight, showing clearly that Shiro was helped by at least one spirit. Combining the spirit's attack patterns and effects with the attacks to the Jackals? Voila, an extra criminal record.
* His best fighting style was exposed, using Jaune's, Shiro's, and White Fox's. No matter how he will try to hide it, people can easily analyze Jaune's fighting style and see that they used the same style even if only bits of it. If Ruby with her lower INT and WIS could quickly deduce his identity, why don't Ozpin, Cinder, and Salem?
* And Candice. Digital traces. Impossible to completely erase.

Basically, he should have Loaded. It's better if you had actually never included the feature in the first place if you don't use it.
6/22/2021 c33 Guest
Come back to me bby
6/21/2021 c33 Kakbiel
6/19/2021 c6 Guest
Worry not jaune magic plus aura can heal anything brooo

Incest born children cant beat a magic heal
6/14/2021 c1 PersonHumanThing
Generic harem fic
6/5/2021 c6 Guest
From what I've read so far this has been much better than than other gamer fics I've read but Im just not feeling it with him having an eventual harem and sharing the gamer stuff but still leagues better than most fics I look for.
6/2/2021 c1 Guest
Autistic ass story
5/19/2021 c15 17Luciendar
Great story. The only depiction of Jaune over even come close to enjoying. This story just wasn't for me. It wasn't what I was looking for, ya know? Too much sex, not enough action. Plus, I wanted more infection with the main cast, especially my fave girl Pyrrha.

Other than that, my only real issue was the reality behind the story. He'd never know if any of the girls truly loved him or it was just his ability. Even Joan didn't truly know him and lived her brother. I doubt she'd have handled the truth well. The other girls were all drawn by his power. It's lungs funny that Cinder was the only person to figure it out and control herself.

Psychologically it all sounds like he's this really sad and lonely guy.

I'll applaud your world building though. You did a phenomenal job of explaining shit. It just didn't do it for me.
4/29/2021 c1 PSYCONIG
Yeah tell everybody that you have powers that makes you a traget, real pro move, why not writing it on your forehead.
4/29/2021 c33 LordFluffyPuffy
This has been a long three days of reading the story. An absolute wonderful journey. I've massively enjoyed the story, the characterization and of course the smut haha. There's a few instances where I felt the info dumps were a bit too many but quite like that the chapter wasn't a narration of a gaming character but an actual story with gaming elements.

Keep up the good stuff!
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