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4/5 c4 1fluffy-fanfic-lover
is this dead
12/7/2019 c3 Visual Bliss
I like the Gilgamesh pairing buuuuuuut everything else was kinda cliche
12/4/2019 c4 8youngmark
Here's another one. XD
The battles were real quick.
I feel like Zouken's defeat was based on the Mafuba from Dragon ball. XD
12/3/2019 c3 youngmark
Here's another review. I already told you my gripe with Naruto being pissed at Rin, even with Gaia's influence.
12/2/2019 c2 youngmark
Here's another review. I feel like Gil is a little too into it.
12/1/2019 c1 youngmark
There we go here's a review. You really haben't updated in a while, huh? XD
8/25/2019 c4 MatthewGremory
to be continued
6/18/2019 c4 1copet
I really like the story. If I had to give criticism, it would be that you could put more development in the chapters, making them longer and even more interesting. Hope to read more of this story
12/28/2018 c4 Not a flamer
Look you have a great plot.
But you needed to check your grammar!
It's the little things like:
"Thank Archer" she thought
"THANKS ARCHER" she thought.
And things such as
" Grrr why you( I forgot the phase)" Naruto said
You can say "Why you !" Naruto growled, his voice as quiet as an avalanche ...
Also your distinct lack of punctuation, and use more similes!
And there is also a lack of character development, such as Naruto, recovering WAY too quickly from being posesed and not, saying even Shirou not questionning Naruto's weird character.
The story also doesn't flow naturaly, you need to work on that, the only way I think you can work on that, is by reading stories that are very well done, ( not saying yours is bad, it just needs an extra oomph) such as Authors like Third Fang, Fairly Tail Dragon Slayer, Kenchi1 ect... (I highly suggest Third Fang as he is doing A fate/Stay night story with over 8k reviews one of the best on this website, as well as an Amazing Naruto story, that has over 9k reviews in total.
Or else you have a great story idear,.
Don't give up! Happy New Year's!
GR
4/2/2017 c4 2miguelgiuliano.co
Interesante historia espero con ansias por el próximo capitulo .
Será posible ver una apographia ?
1/4/2017 c2 T
YOu need better punctuation so it will make more sense. it was Pretty much a run 9n sentence which didn't work.
10/11/2016 c4 Hirameki Kitsune
Good story
9/26/2016 c4 Stratos263
Well that got graphic really quickly
9/26/2016 c3 Stratos263
What is with the mark on Naruto chest
9/26/2016 c2 Stratos263
Whoa more interesting stuff happen
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