for Lyrical Nanoha Robot Wars: INNONCENT5/24/2016 c3 Purple Heart
Don't tell me Levi is suppose to be Deadpool...
Don't tell me Levi is suppose to be Deadpool...
5/24/2016 c2 Purple Heart
Awesome. But isn't cutting a mech in half using nothing but a HF Horn kinda overkill?
Awesome. But isn't cutting a mech in half using nothing but a HF Horn kinda overkill?
5/25/2016 c3 
6Eldenwind
Well, my friend, here we go again. I see you've brought in even more references this time.
Poor Nanoha, her upgrades are limited, and only one slot... For the best really, it's would be broken as hell when fully upgraded.
I can see some grammar mistakes all over the place, so maybe you would want to think about that? And honestly I don't see any problem with putting ice in the water category. Ice is after all water, if frozen. Besides, the spirits from La Gias follow the elements as defined by classical western alchemy, fire, water, earth, air and void (although I can only name one void spirit).
Other than that, I have to admit that I'm not overly fond of your combining Levi and Deadpool. Or am I forgetting something about one of the Materials again?
Keep up the good work.
6EldenwindWell, my friend, here we go again. I see you've brought in even more references this time.
Poor Nanoha, her upgrades are limited, and only one slot... For the best really, it's would be broken as hell when fully upgraded.
I can see some grammar mistakes all over the place, so maybe you would want to think about that? And honestly I don't see any problem with putting ice in the water category. Ice is after all water, if frozen. Besides, the spirits from La Gias follow the elements as defined by classical western alchemy, fire, water, earth, air and void (although I can only name one void spirit).
Other than that, I have to admit that I'm not overly fond of your combining Levi and Deadpool. Or am I forgetting something about one of the Materials again?
Keep up the good work.
5/24/2016 c3 1The Otaku Critic
Awesome mechs. I see that you're favoring the FIRE elemental lord, eh?
1The Otaku CriticAwesome mechs. I see that you're favoring the FIRE elemental lord, eh?
5/24/2016 c3 1Natoko Mizuki
Apparently Levi's naming philosophy is taken from Ryusei: As zany as possible. Anyway, good chapter.
1Natoko MizukiApparently Levi's naming philosophy is taken from Ryusei: As zany as possible. Anyway, good chapter.
5/24/2016 c2 Natoko Mizuki
The Nanorymer is in danger of becomming an OP Mary Sue here...if it wasn't for the fact that it requires too much will to do anything, and even Divine Shoot takes up too much EN.
The Nanorymer is in danger of becomming an OP Mary Sue here...if it wasn't for the fact that it requires too much will to do anything, and even Divine Shoot takes up too much EN.
5/24/2016 c2 1The Otaku Critic
Uuuhhh, is it just me, or is the Nanorymer was purposefully MADE to be OP?
1The Otaku CriticUuuhhh, is it just me, or is the Nanorymer was purposefully MADE to be OP?
5/22/2016 c2 6Eldenwind
Well, I have no words. But I do believe the balancing department messed up there.
Don't you think Vita's defence is a tad bit low? I mean, I know that pilots with high in this stat are about as rare as it gets, but still... Vita is a tank. Blocking damage is one of her specialities if my memory serves.
I would tell you to limit the fourth wall breakage, but... As long as you're not trying to write something serious I guess it's fine. Other than that I would request you don't change around character's personalities too much, but since this is your story I'll just leave you alone.
Don't give up! Don't falter! Believe in the me that believes in you!
6EldenwindWell, I have no words. But I do believe the balancing department messed up there.
Don't you think Vita's defence is a tad bit low? I mean, I know that pilots with high in this stat are about as rare as it gets, but still... Vita is a tank. Blocking damage is one of her specialities if my memory serves.
I would tell you to limit the fourth wall breakage, but... As long as you're not trying to write something serious I guess it's fine. Other than that I would request you don't change around character's personalities too much, but since this is your story I'll just leave you alone.
Don't give up! Don't falter! Believe in the me that believes in you!
5/18/2016 c1 Purple Heart
This is so much fun, even though it is ridiculous and sometime stupid as hell...in a good way!
It's like I'm playing my own game!
This is so much fun, even though it is ridiculous and sometime stupid as hell...in a good way!
It's like I'm playing my own game!
5/15/2016 c1 1The Otaku Critic
Was that "Ice Barrier Bouncer" joke really necessary? I mean, she isn't Brionac, y'know?
Those jokes should be save for Hayate. She is rightfully OP and she have attacks with names like the Ice Barrier Dragons.
1The Otaku CriticWas that "Ice Barrier Bouncer" joke really necessary? I mean, she isn't Brionac, y'know?
Those jokes should be save for Hayate. She is rightfully OP and she have attacks with names like the Ice Barrier Dragons.
5/15/2016 c1 6Eldenwind
The base concept of Innocent combined with Super Robot Wars and large amounts of referential humour... Good grief you can be crazy entertaining at times. Sadly, I have to inform you that I do not know of any BGM called "The Narrator is an asshole." Have you properly confirmed that this is indeed a properly existent BGM?
On a more serious note, I feel like Nanoha's melee stat is too high and her ranged stat too low. Because, let's be honest, Nanoha's way of dealing with melee is to either fly off or whack the opponent with her staff. I'm also not sure how a Myers Briggs test combined with basic information is able to determine a fitting mech and skills for someone. Then again it gave Nanoha a Grungust so... I'm also not sure I would describe the Alteisen as the bastard child between a red Gespenst and Goldymarg, but then again that certainly is a way to describe it.
Try not to lose the will to write this time, your stories are an excellent source of amusement for me.
6EldenwindThe base concept of Innocent combined with Super Robot Wars and large amounts of referential humour... Good grief you can be crazy entertaining at times. Sadly, I have to inform you that I do not know of any BGM called "The Narrator is an asshole." Have you properly confirmed that this is indeed a properly existent BGM?
On a more serious note, I feel like Nanoha's melee stat is too high and her ranged stat too low. Because, let's be honest, Nanoha's way of dealing with melee is to either fly off or whack the opponent with her staff. I'm also not sure how a Myers Briggs test combined with basic information is able to determine a fitting mech and skills for someone. Then again it gave Nanoha a Grungust so... I'm also not sure I would describe the Alteisen as the bastard child between a red Gespenst and Goldymarg, but then again that certainly is a way to describe it.
Try not to lose the will to write this time, your stories are an excellent source of amusement for me.