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for Mistakes of the Past: The First X-Games

2/15/2019 c35 5AlexFalTon
I must say, this has been a creative way of making the Hunger Games. The powers, the realism. And the ending.

Elim you did well on this. I can't wait for the sequel.
2/13/2018 c35 5So hard to choose usernames
I love Alvin, I’m just going to get that out there because he is my absolute favourite character and I can’t wait to see him in the sequel. I am glad that the coaches were proved wrong and that Alvin is helping to undermine the actual games, or at least the plan to get the rest of the X-men, by helping out Piper and the other mutants. It was also really sweet when he prioritized getting Hiro back to Jayden’s Aunt. I am so excited to see where his storyline will go.

Onto Piper, I am glad she survived although I with it had of been Akil because I liked him more. Still, her storyline with Erik is pretty great and I can see why she was the one that survived in the end. I am pumped to read more about Sanctuary 2.0 in the sequel and just how they might go about stopping the games. The fact that they are in Canada is awesome.

As for sanctuary I can say I did not expect the Linda and Anita Donahue plot twist but I enjoyed it. I’m wondering if Anita has any plans to help the mutants and just how her mother might react to finding out her daughter is with the MAAB. I can’t say I found Penelope all that interesting but I am looking forward to seeing whether or not she tries to break free again.

I’m looking forward to reading the sequel and seeing just what X-Men might have survived.
2/4/2018 c35 10BamItsTyler
You know what they say, you can't rush perfection! This chapter was worth the wait for sure.

So the entire island has been destroyed eh? I didn't imgaine 'energy manipulation' to go that far. Then again, if you can absorb the energy out of a nuclear reactor and act like a walking atom bomb, then destroying a small island isn't totally outta reach.

At least Snowball is still alive, and with kits!

Hmm, when it comes to their whole diatribe about improving on the formula they threw together, I was expecting the other authors to make just as dangerous 'tributes' like I did Penelope. When I only saw the likes of mayyyyybe John, then the elementals, I was like, "Woah, she's pretty OP compared to the rest." I wondered how it'd play out, and it played out pretty good.

That's the unoffical thing? I thought Penelope was going to be a secret agent or something . . . true story! But this seems just as plausible. Yeah see, my biases about Penelope were somewhat true, just warped along the way in order for MAAB to use Piper to try and kill off the Brotherhood.

... You americans and your stereotypes. MOUNTIES DRESS LIKE REGULAR COPS Y'KNOW! The red serges are ceremonial, a 'face' if you will, like how you picture a 'Marine'. But it was a funny touch regardless. *Puts away nerd glasses*. Again, nice touch with the 'old person who isn't 'hip' so doesn't know the slang of our day.'

Haha! I did a double take when Alvin spoke to Penelope about Anita . . . then the transition to Linda I was like !? What the heck was going on, but then your previous chapter, about Anita's sister being a

Did I write that about Linda in my form? WOw . . . that really went over my head, LOL. The whole thing about the sixties and her being a down to earth, I wrote that didn't I? And I read through It and didn't pick up on it . . .hahaha. That's good. I wish I had your skill with element of surprise, hidden surprises at that.

Because . . . we don't really go back to our form, only when were being selected for the SYOT in general, otherwise we don't look at it again. And when people read interludes... grasping the details aren't our forte, or we don't really dig in to it. I appreciate that easter egg! :)

Penelope is a teenager now. And the eyeroll only confirms that. The contrast makes me sad, Penelope is ...sorta free and Piper *is* free. I do enjoy how 'grounded' you made her character. Its like, okay, you've killed a dozens of people, lost friends along the way, you're property of the government and this is how its gonna be and now I have to live with that, but soon, with that 'cooperation' will come influence, and that influence will shape how the Games will change.

Its ambiguous but am I reading Ian's question right? President Nicholas Wright!? Make America Human Again . . . Uh oh. We'll deport all the mutants to Canada and build a wall along the border and make *us* pay for it?!

I wonder what Penelope will look like in the next installment, as I'm assuming there will possibly be a time warp.

I have the idea for my next mutant, just have to type it all down...

As per usual, give yourself a bow, thank you for the story, I appreciate it , see you next time. Yadda, yadda, yadda.
1/10/2018 c34 5So hard to choose usernames
Ok so I haven’t reviewed in a while, I’ve been reading but I just keep forgetting to review. Since the games are over I’m just going to review the last four chapters with this review, and there is a lot to talk about. Man, I can’t wait for the final chapter to see what the other victor is wanted for.

So I’m going to start my review off by talking about Victoria. This is because I honestly think she had the best character development I have ever read, I started out hating her and honestly she was my second favourite character by the time she finally died. Losing her voice really humbled her and it made her a much better person, a lot of people might have just given up after losing their power but she ultimately changed. Sacrificing herself for Akil and Piper was the best ending she could have gotten and I really think it showed how much she growled overall as a character. I kind of wish she had won but I’m satisfied with her death overall.

Cassidy and Natasha fighting was something I wasn’t very surprised over, and while I was rooting for Cassidy I figured Natasha would win because she is more cunning overall. However, I was not expecting Ben to have instigated the fight by drawing the heat out of the air. I honestly thought he had a chance at winning, or that he’d team up with Akil and Piper to attack Penelope. I have to say I was shocked by his death, it was unexpected for me but it did make me realize how dangerous illusions can really be.

I’ll admit, I was not expecting Cameron to come up with such a good plan, luring the two groups together to fight. It’s a shame he had to die but I’m not really surprised overall, he was too nice to survive. Reese was also an awesome character but he also didn’t have it in him to kill, if he did he would have gone with Simon to the lake.

If Terry and Taylor hadn’t fought each other to the death one of them would have won, maybe even both. I’m going to say one of them because Penelope is a force to be reckoned with. They were a seriously powerful duo and I’m honestly amazed at what Akil and Victoria did to make them fight, it was ingenious.

And now onto Akil, my absolute favourite character. I was rooting for him to win since Piper was blind and I thought he could trick Penelope and stab her but alas, it wasn’t meant to be. He was a pretty deadly duo with Piper while it lasted and his thoughts about her being all he had broke my heart because I knew he’d die for her in that moment. He started to doubt wanting to survive if it meant Piper died and I just knew he wasn’t going to win. I can’t remember who made him but to the author that did, you made an awesome character and I loved reading his POV throughout the fanfic.

When Akil died I honestly thought Piper was a goner. I mean I know she really developed into a cunning badass, with the way she helped kill Verona and how she handled Reese, but I mean she’s blind and against Penelope. However the two victors thing really shocked me, but I have to admit I really like this twist. I’m really curious to see her thoughts on it, I mean it’s obvious Diana never told her because she fought Penelope after their collars were turned off.

As for Penelope there’s not much to say, I mean she is a badass and has insane powers so I’m not too surprised she won. What I am looking forward to learning is what the MAAB has planned for her now that the Games are over. I mean she is very powerful, not blind, and has escaped government custody once before so it is her future I’m looking forward to the most, depending on whether or not you write a sequel or have Erik save them.

I am also looking forward to reading the final chapter and seeing how this all wraps up and everything. Ties together. It’d be cute if Hiro could be Pipers seeing eye dog or something but I’m assuming she might find it weird since Jayden died and Alvin did promise he’d give the dog back to her aunt. Anyways, I’m looking forward to reading the next chapter to find out what the second victor is needed for! Oh, and where they might be planning on holding future games since the island got destroyed.
1/9/2018 c34 4bobothebear
ok you got me this time i did not see that one coming

Ben - I was expecting him to get 3rd after killing Akil/Piper and the other one killing him back to set up for a one on one between Penelope and Akil/Piper but now we know that would've been super anticlimactic since MAAB would've just swooped in after lul. Out of the four, Ben was probably my favorite just in his character (his power was about average). I found him to be the most relatable and \changed\ from all this. The moment that comes to mind is him standing above Natasha after she'd killed Cassidy and wondering if he should. rip benny boi

Akil - I was definitely thinking he would win so when he died i was like :O Akil probably had my favorite power out of these four, maybe out of the whole arena. shoutout to olive for being a cool calico cat and making this treasure. He was always a dynamic part of the story and I really enjoyed watching him interact with Piper and Victoria and Diana (omg that was a millennium ago).

Piper/Penelope - Reviewing them together might feel weird but to me, they're kind of a package now. They're so so different, and that's what makes them such an interesting surviving pair. Penelope's this hardened, unmoving child and Piper is very much the opposite - a broken, changed, and reformed girl. Reading the story, I'd say Penelope wasn't my favorite throughout just in her predictability and unmatched strength, but I think what she does in the post-story is really interesting: she's the face of the Mutant Games, belligerent and remorseless and vicious (even tho that's not her but irrelevant). Piper was definitely one of my favorite characters throughout the story (that alliance was always the most dynamic group) and I think she'll be equally interesting in her role of training future mutants and whatnot.

wow watch me get their roles reversed

Overall, I'm super super super happy with the way things turned out and the way you've wrapped up this story! see ya for the conclusion!
1/9/2018 c34 12jakey121
So this is probably a pretty crappy place to restart reviewing, and we both know why I'm reviewing this chapter so I'm not gonna try and defend myself. I am really sorry I slipped off the radar, but I am genuinely grateful for you bringing Piper all the way and out of this Arena.

Joint victor with Penelope is awesome, and they're both so different. One was probably the greatest threat in the entire Arena, I mean when she literally just touched Natasha and she like exploded yeah that was intense. And then you have Piper who legit went blind however many chapters ago - but she's done some stuff, she's been through a rough ride, and if it weren't for Akil I doubt she'd have made it here. I loved Akil. He was one of my favourites and if it weren't Piper who was to join Penelope as victor, I would have chosen him for sure.

I liked Penelope. I remember Tyler getting like all frantic about hoping there was gonna be at least a few more tributes with attack based powers than just defence so I can see why he gave Penelope this damn good power. She wasn't really OP because she was still a good character. If only one were to survive, realistically it would be Penelope, but in terms of story and such bias aside I would have said Piper out of these two. Only because everyone likes an underdog and for once being 12 meant absolutely nothing.

Overall this has been a very different, but very good story. I haven't been as obsessed with this one as others - but that's mainly because life got in the way. I'm no longer that teenager glued to their laptop, refreshing for updates, hovering over blogs and discussing SYOTs with my other ff friends. I'm graduating, starting a job this year, moving into a house with my partner, everything is very real right now and fanfiction took a step back a long time ago. But I have still stuck around, and I will still stick around for your other SYOT and if you produce anything else. You're the only writer I still read - partly because no one else seems to be writing anymore, and partly because you've always been a favourite. And now I finally have an Elim victor! I'm proud of that!

Again thank you, this was a great chapter, a great story, and overall another brilliant addition to what you've provided this website with.

Can't wait for the next chapter!
1/8/2018 c34 10BamItsTyler
Be Tyler
Be chillin Monday night, working away on projects and what not
Casually checks Elim's blog, sees that its a 404
Omhomhomomgomgogmg dot jpeg.

Heart races while he slowly peers through the chapter . . . afraid and frightened.

Hmm, I wasn't expecting Taylor at all. The Akil/Piper/Penelope being the top was what I was expecting. Morseo Akil than everyone else.

Okay! So, my "doomsday theory" had two or so distinct scenarios.

ONE: Ben was going to run far enough to meet up with Akil and Piper, and try and team up again Penelope in which she dies.

TWO: Akil and Piper do some Tom-foolery with the illusion projection, something like seeing Harper again or her former "Sanctuary." Then they kill her while she's distracted. But her personality doesn't really call for being sentimental, and I was partly right about using illusion, but she already saw em coming.

THREE?: The island crumbles after Penelope dying, but Akil or Piper finally succumb to their hypothermia and die before one of em is picked up.

I'm glad to say I was wrong, but surprised at this ending overall! I can see why though. Why not have the best of both worlds? Piper, although limited in scope, has temporal foresight - which would be beneficial in multiple instances for MAAB to use in the future. She'd serve well in some form of advisory position.

Penelope in my mind was a shoe in to win. Imagine seeing a twelve year old girl blowing someone to bits, stopping someones heart with a touch and creating shockwaves strong enough to collapse a small island, then put that on your TV sets. She's the ultimate propaganda tool without her even knowing it. Clearly every political across the aisle would approve anything the MAAB asks for.

I was expecting her to come out on top *alone*, but having them too will be interesting, which makes me yearn for the "ending".

A side note: I've been doing some research . . . and the term "Nothing new is ever original" rings so true for when it comes to me and creating Penelope. I recently watched "Logan" and I kinda facepalmed at seeing X2. MIND YOU, I've never picked up a comic. I'm a casual fan of the series in general . . . I've seen X1 . . . X2 was decent? I've seen First Class and the other 2010's installments. I mainly modeled her power after Sebastian Shaw, unaware of the whole "Children of DNA being used as Supersoldiers" . . . in a series like Xmen, you kinda expect super soldiers to be a thing.

Meh . . . Penelope was made in good faith ;).

All in all, I enjoyed every time she had a point of view. Stoic and extremely mature for someone so young, she seems like she was primed for an environment like this. Since the beginning she had nothing to lose Very detached from her environment- if she were like Jayden and the rest, who had 'normal' upbringings, I don't think she would've made it. With military writing in mind, she took the loss of Rachel and the killing of Monet like nothing. She's seen loss countless times, the island and the things she would have to do would just be one of many.

Thank you for writing her- it's always nice to see a "Younger experiment trying to survive" trope being worked on.

I wonder what an "Older" Penelope would look like. Mind you she can manipulate energy. "It keeps her young" eheheh. What about the future of the X-Games? Like I said the footage would be enough to give Nicholas and Co. all the funding they'd need for a lifetime. What about Piper and Family?

I guess I'll bide my time for the "closing update" . . . begrudgingly.
12/20/2017 c33 BamItsTyler
As soon as I saw this update, I could hear my heart beating in my ears. Its safe to say that I was releaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaved and amazed and excited all at the same time . . .

Everytime there's a bloodbath chapter for any story or a fight scene involving my character, I always getting a little antsy :(. I guess that's a . . . *plus* in terms of your writing ability and the skill to keep your readers on the edge.

Dr. Donahue: potential injuries that may arise . . . mhm.

Terry/Rachel fight: I didn't think of water being the equalizer to Rachel's power. Death by drowning is something I've had a brush with from time to time, scary stuff . . . I don't have much to say, as the circumstances revolving around their demise are so set in stone. Would they be able to trust each other *if* they stopped fighting . . . maybe. If only they understoon Victoria's power beforehand, then maybe things could've been resolved. Then again, with Terrry's lack of humanity in the early stages of the Games, I recall that sew some 'doubts' between both 'tributes'.

The Volcano scene: THAT was what I was afraid of. The cooling of the lava. then again, her power makes that attempt null. My heart was beating so crazily until She clasped Natasha's hand then I was like

o sht.

Now I know what happened to the likes of Colonel Hendry and that guy . . . Darwin? I guess that's what PG-13 does to genres like x-men. I enjoyed the description, I wasn't expecting that to happen. So the 'Careers' of our 'Games' are as I thought they were, scared children who *reacted* instead of *acted* . . . if these 'games' were to continue, I mean waaaaaaaaaaay into the future, I could see more powerful groups binding together and taking out the weaker contestants. Trial and error is king for this story. How's Ben's ribs by the way ;)))))))))))))))))))?!

The pessimist in me has one more negative outcome foreseen . . . but I'll bide my thoughts as I did with this chapter.

Both Akil and Piper have realistic rationales . . . I'll keep trying to think things through. Oh yes, he doesn't have a working hand besides one . . .hmph.

How would that go? I wonder . . . Will anyone survive!? I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

It's been a good year of this story. A crazy concept but a plausible one at that too. I wonder how the epilogue and stuff will work out? Not to mention you have Hide your Fires, and we're just moving on to the next phase almost. That will also be pretty interesting.

So many thoughts, oh boy . . . I'll just continue to ponder and unleash them all next chapter. As per usual, great chapter . . . you're awesome as per usual . . . happy holidays . . .

and yeah, see you in the next chapter!
12/5/2017 c32 1grimbutnotalways
This is actually insane. Just the image of Penelope standing in all that lava basking in the energy is actually terrifying. I have no idea what anyone on this island could actually do to stop her, much less just Ben and Nat.
Poor Cameron, he went through so much crap. He watched both his friends die, then got caught between two groups trying to murder him.
Really enjoyed Victoria's growth this chapter though... Oh, I just realized "growth" is probobly a weird way of putting it now that she's dead. Still, I felt that she really did change after having people who she could rely on not because she made them but because they wanted to be reliable and it was really cool to see the result of that.
As for the result of that dedication... TERRY, TAYLOR GODDAMN IT! STOOOP! How the hell does that even work? I suppose her power has more to do with touch than the actual commands since it didn't have to be her actual voice. Crud, they were a pretty powerful team too (Not that it would've mattered with Penelope around.)
In conclusion: Fuck.
12/4/2017 c32 10BamItsTyler
Help, I'm hanging off a cliff and I'm not sure if I can hold out much longer :(

Hey hey! That camp Nanaimo thing is back up again. I wish I had your speed ;) Just as I was ironing out this chapter, you decided to update again.

So Judah is the guy who did it eh? I don't blame him. Me pegging Francine as the one who did it could go both ways, as she didn't possibly want anyone getting hurt from any fallout from the volcano. Then again, his motivations for wanting the "others" to kill each other off makes sense.

Nicholas seems like your typical 'conniving' boss in this segment, it really brings that "Head Honcho" personality to light. Agitated, very particular in how he wants things done. So on and so forth. And he's old!but they all are pretty up there in age, but still.

How will Taylor die? Or can she die. This should be interesting to see next time. That whole meeting and fight was unexpected. I didn't see Piper doing what she did. Victoria finally got her voice back as well for one last hurrah. Speaking of Piper, I wonder where she and Akil fit, honestly . . . hmmm. I guess all will be revealed soon enough.

Shugarloaf bonanza: I'm so scarred! And the fact that we have a cliffhanger makes me even more giddy to get to the next chapter :/ Not that I want to even read the next chapter with the possibilities swimming in my head.

I like that heel you gave her, in regards to dropping the past and having a 'realistic' point of view in regard to these games. That, and the whole her tapping into the lengths her power is willing to go and *liking* it, it all gives off good visuals and a good grasp on her character. I liked that part of the chapter the most.

Nat's first impression on Ben's power has me thinking. He doesn't have projection which I find relieving. I don't think gravity manipulation can do much, in terms of offensive capability but maybe Im not thinking too hard. I do have one clear idea on how this can go exactly, and I'm not liking it! Now that I'm actually giving it thought . . . I'm not going to anymore.

. . . Still! I can only hope for the best.

Otherwise, a very good chapter as per usual. I will await the next one.
11/18/2017 c31 BamItsTyler
Wowowwo, we're so very close! Hello Elim, how are you :D.

Shameless advertisement here. So, there's this SYOT right, but it's not getting off the ground in the way it should be. It's basically a AU SYOT set in the Thirteen Colonies in a world where the loyalist beat the patriots. 13 colonies, 13 tributes, you know the drill basically.

It's called "To Cry Peccavi" by The Wandering Phantom. I guess because a lot of people aren't really savvy with history, it flew over their heads... it's just a recommendation if you have time.


I'm not sure what to think about all this MAAB politics. I'm going to keep quiet about speculating about Penelope's psyche as I already an inkling of what she would think about the current situation. I have my fingers crossed.

There's a lot of internal strife concerning Ben and his thoughts. That's very true, in training, they pegged me as a force to be reckoned with due to their 'Career' like development, but I guess reality smacked them upside the head.

I really enjoy her inner monologue. I have high hopes. What ever she does, she'll do it with calculation, that's always a in a setting like this.

Terry and Rachel are on the move . . . I wonder how Reese and Cameron will handle this threat. I've been blindsided on how ones power, however harmless, could cause so much conflict. I'm looking forward to the possibilities that might arise with his conclusion to hunt Cameron down.

Akil, Piper,Victoria dilemma: I don't really feel this alliance. Vic's inner thoughts are right . . . if they were by themselves, they'd be dead most likely. So I wonder how they'll face conflict in the future.
Verona seemed to be too broken to move on, so this end seems plausible to me. I found it slightly annoying that they were going to skip confrontation altogether, but the last sentence of this chapter reaffirmed that they are conflicted instead of resolute.

Who is the whistleblower!? Is it Francine?! She seems emotional . . . hmmm, the next chapter will reveal everything, and then I will feel complete once I see the "inner workings" of why the person did what they did and how this will all play together.
11/18/2017 c31 1grimbutnotalways
That was one hell of a chapter. So much shit happened in it I don't even know where to begin. I guess with Verona's death. I'm a bit surprised she told the truth though I can't imagine the emotions she must've been feeling at that point. Slitting a crying little girl's throat can't feel great either but I agree that it was the best decision. Penelope's still heading toward the volcano and that's still what frightens me most. Found out someone's trying to get all the contestants closer to each other. Everything feels like it's coming to a crescendo here. Taylor trying to hide that Terry had killed was pretty awesome even if he found out anyway. I feel terrible for Cameron but at least he found Reese. Piper, Victoria and Akil seem to be very powerful together at least. Ben and Nat seem to be the tensest alliance here.
Anyway, really looking forward to the next chapter, seems like that's when shits gonna hit the fan.
10/28/2017 c30 10BamItsTyler
Hey Elim, sorry for the late review.

You know the jig, I always read as soon as the update is out, but then again I get slow when it comes to actually reviewing.

Heh, there's only 11 people left . . . in a span of 2 years..hmph. Just the other day we were only just learning about them and now a Victor of your experiment will be crowned. I wonder what the next big conflict will be, and who'll win hmmm. I hope that last part isn't true ;).

Cameron is just chilling. I wonder where he'll end up.

Reese: Hey hey! He broke Verona's code! His power was actually quite useful in that regard.

Fight Sequence: There wasn't much leeway for truces or escape. In my opinion, it was paranoia that resulted of this. You showed off the tension and the fight scenes very well. You have a good penchant for that, your fights always seemed to be very . . . "Simple". Be it your Hunger Games arenas not having actual weaponry as a common occurrence, and Cassidy dying by being stabbed and drowned. Very practical, very *personal* I would say.

I wonder where these guys will go . . . I think you might surprise me though. Personally I dont see much? But I know you'll make it work. Their powers got discombobulated due to their disabilities, but somehow they make it work. But will it be effective for the upcoming stuff, who knowss.

At least terry is realistic. Considering his edge of the island and taylor as well, I wonder what'll bring everyone together or how they'll interact with those around them, if plausible.
10/21/2017 c30 1grimbutnotalways
So, nobody seems to be stopping Penelope (Not that many people could do anything to stop Penelope). That could be really really bad for a lot of contestants. Not sure exactly what she's planning on doing but I am sure that if she manages it we'll have a lot less than 11 tributes left. That kinda scares and excites me at the same time.
That fight between Cassidy and Nat was really well done. I really felt the tension building up until there was really no other way to end it but in a fight. Still, someone really... BEN-efited from this! I'm so sorry.
9/11/2017 c29 5So hard to choose usernames
To quote Vincent: "Holy shit."

I was not expecting that, if I'm being honest I thought Veronas power would only be good if she manipulated Victoria's words (before she lost her voice) so I never expected this outcome. So just ... wow, I'm in shock. It's a plot twist I never saw coming but it makes so much sense, I love it but holy cow.

I think the saddest part was Verona crying at the end. She's breaking my heart and I feel bad for her, I'm rooting for her to win but I don't know if she'll be able to get over what she did when she realizes they misinterpreted the number 7. I'm hoping Snowball will find her because Verona needs something cute to cheer her up, although it may just cause more pain.

As for my OCs death. Jayden made me sad but I'm happy she didn't kill anyone and she made Snowball run, I count it as a win for her because while she may have decided to fight in the end she didn't hurt anyone and she didn't become the "monster" her parents thought she was, she stayed pure. I'm satisfied with her death, saddened but it was well written. I'm just wondering what will happen to Hiro now, I know Alvin promised to return him to Katrina.

Now onto Penelope, that plan is crazy and I'm wondering how the heck it'll work without her blowing up everything. Will the MAAB turn her collar on? Or will they let it happen? If she does that it could be the kind of signal Erik needs to swoop in and save the survivor(s). I'm still excited to see that storyline and what Diana demanded.

I checked out the map and I'm wondering if Akil, Piper, and Victoria will end up encountering Penelope. I think it'd be kind of awesome since they also stopped the last disaster on the island, can't wait to find out.

Only a few contestants left and I'm rooting for Akil to win! He's my favourite, if he dies I have a backup, but here's hoping he survives.

Can't wait for the next chapter!
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