Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for Ashura: Into the Digi-Dungeon

12/6/2017 c12 19Boyzilla
Yeah, the 'Naruto Characters' don't seem to play much part and could have easily been replaced with OCs or other Fate or Digimon human characters. They are just a means of background filler atm taking place of obvious characters (seriously, Kushina replaced Taiga seemingly!)

I'm getting the feeling this is originally intended to he a Fate x Digimon crossover but you believed it would get more traction and attention by replacing or adding Naruto characters into thr fold. Which really undermines the story more than helps it. Not that I blame you, I was also inexperianced as you were at one time and can understand the feeling that nobody would pay attention to thr story.

The true meaning behind Fanfiction writing is releasing your imagination and enjoying what you write! Never feel the responsibilty of having to update, you write for your sake, not your readers. Enjoy writing the story! Not just its afterglow of reviews.
12/6/2017 c7 Boyzilla
Okay, let's see it's mostly Fate Stay Night (VN influenced) along with Digimon Tamers with a touch of Cyber Slueth (hence the Eaters, now?) with Naruto characters... But not actually Naruto characters... Mostly just names/personalities? A bit confusing they act more like OCs than actual Naruto stuff
12/6/2017 c5 Boyzilla
This story seems catagorized wrong, this is more Fate x Digimon than Naruto x Digimon. It would attract more attention if you had put it into the right one. As a fellow Fate x Digimon FF author, I'm enjoying a change of pace with the Digimon being the Servants. Hadn't seen that before.
8/16/2017 c1 76DarkChild316
Well, I don't usually review other stories outside of M Rated stories, but you asked so I'll give it a go.

Overall, I think you've got a lot of promise as a writer. Your storytelling skills are pretty decent for an inexperienced author. I must say I'm impressed with how well your story flowed together, and how well choreographed they were (although I still think there's plenty of room for improvement on your part).

However, there are two MAJOR areas of criticism I have to impart on you and I truly hope you don't get offended and take these words to heart. The first criticism is the length, or should I say lack of length in your chapters. As well as the chapters flowed together, they often felt rushed and hurried as if you were trying to speed through it and get it done with, instead of taking your time and creatively thinking and planning it out.

The second area of criticism (and this is one I get onto people about all the time around here, so rest assured you're not the first and you probably won't be the last) is your over reliance on Original Characters. This is one of those things that bothers me more than anything else here on FanFiction because it takes away from the element of realism in the story and makes the story look a lot less real and organic. I'd prefer it if you were going to do a crossover story, to find a way to do it between the characters in the canon universe from the respective shows!

Other than those things I pointed out, I'd say just continue to refine and sharpen your already admittedly decent storytelling skills and you'll have a bright future here on this site.

God is Love
DarkChild316
8/1/2017 c1 Guest
Try a naruto crossover digimon tri fanfiction were naruto is a new student at the digidestins high school , but has a secret, he doesn't know that he has the crest of light and darkness in him. Is two digipathner can be form the royal knights or the seven demon Lords, for the light crest it's power can cure an infected digimon while the dark can corrupt a digimon to dark digivovle. good/evil naruto due to the crests, parring Kari.
7/28/2017 c1 6mangogreent
Although I haven't watched Digimon, this Fanfiction has a fair amount of description as it doesn't feel too short or too overloaded with it.

I enjoy your variety of words you have used and great punctuation despite your chapter to lack a few periods at the end of paragraphs.

I hope you continue to write this intriguing fanfiction.
7/1/2017 c12 2SuperApplePie
The grammar's pretty good and the pacing is too. It could do with a little more editing but all in all, it isn't bad. It seems to be following Fate's storyline way too exactly though, even down to the character interactions. The best parts are when you actually add original character interactions.
6/1/2017 c11 21HyperA1985
I am looking forward to chapter 12 and I wonder if Renamon fall in love with Naruto.
5/1/2017 c10 HyperA1985
I am looking forward to chapter 11 and is Naruto's digivise a digifusion one.
4/11/2017 c9 HyperA1985
I am looking forward to chapter 10 and I think Mabel be perfect girlfriend for Naruto.
12/29/2016 c6 14hussbek
Quite interesting, multiple crossovers in a single story. It has the potential to be a great story
10/26/2016 c4 21HyperA1985
I am looking forward to chapter 5 and I hope Ashura use what his father path of six sages taught him.
10/11/2016 c4 1Oniele
Too damn close to fate.

Still pretty interesting! Thank you for the chapter~.
9/24/2016 c3 1Fairytail1704
Nice chapter.!
9/7/2016 c3 1Oniele
Definitely.
Thank you for the chapter.

The Emperor protects.
20 Page 1 2 Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service