
6h c25 Dredre2023
It would have been cool if there were some water benders or earthbenders with azula division. I remember a pjo / avatar fanfic where a water bender and earthbender was born from a firenation colony and were fire nation citizens
It would have been cool if there were some water benders or earthbenders with azula division. I remember a pjo / avatar fanfic where a water bender and earthbender was born from a firenation colony and were fire nation citizens
9h c10 Dredre2023
Back then I didnt know alotabput the world of asiaof . I read watched the show and I dint even realize about thr asioaf until 2 year after watching show and a reading a bunch of fanfic.
The goat is that god that demands blood and the 7 gods
Back then I didnt know alotabput the world of asiaof . I read watched the show and I dint even realize about thr asioaf until 2 year after watching show and a reading a bunch of fanfic.
The goat is that god that demands blood and the 7 gods
9h c9 Dredre2023
Its so good to reread fanfic bc I didnt realize. Azula and stannis had Valyrian steel sword amd that wildfire part that azula knew.
Also I alwasy wondered about the orgin of the Kemurikage. I was shocked that it was started with Xai Bau dead wife. Ik Xai Bau is the owner of the team shop.
Ik seffton can bend wildfire. I wonder if the nonbender were affected by wildfire like benders were
Its so good to reread fanfic bc I didnt realize. Azula and stannis had Valyrian steel sword amd that wildfire part that azula knew.
Also I alwasy wondered about the orgin of the Kemurikage. I was shocked that it was started with Xai Bau dead wife. Ik Xai Bau is the owner of the team shop.
Ik seffton can bend wildfire. I wonder if the nonbender were affected by wildfire like benders were
10h c8 Dredre2023
This is why i love azula in this bc she's so smart and creating a cult of personality
This is why i love azula in this bc she's so smart and creating a cult of personality
6/18 c3 Dredre2023
I found this today even tho its been 2 years since I read this /Characters/FuryAndFlame
Also I love this and its sequel Op really good
I found this today even tho its been 2 years since I read this /Characters/FuryAndFlame
Also I love this and its sequel Op really good
2/26 c69 dannasama
first you kill of ty lee and now mai? Propably... Just why. Just cause its a got fanfic, you don't have to kill off the best characters. Ty lee's death was already bad enough, and it happened off screen no less. pointless drama
first you kill of ty lee and now mai? Propably... Just why. Just cause its a got fanfic, you don't have to kill off the best characters. Ty lee's death was already bad enough, and it happened off screen no less. pointless drama
2/26 c69 asd
you foreshadowed the reveal of the other way too much from way too many places. It was obvious something would go wrong. If every other person and their mother's keep saying "I have a bad feeling about this..." it's ibvious
you foreshadowed the reveal of the other way too much from way too many places. It was obvious something would go wrong. If every other person and their mother's keep saying "I have a bad feeling about this..." it's ibvious
2/25 c58 habba
goos story, but I don't see the point of the propaganda machine still being so hard at work. In westetors, they truly are the civilised and modern society, even more than in atla world. So why they continue to spit on history and lie about the airnomads so much? It's like an adult man in adult hood constantly tells the story how he beat his enemy on the kindergarten playground
goos story, but I don't see the point of the propaganda machine still being so hard at work. In westetors, they truly are the civilised and modern society, even more than in atla world. So why they continue to spit on history and lie about the airnomads so much? It's like an adult man in adult hood constantly tells the story how he beat his enemy on the kindergarten playground
2/24 c31 habba
if that wasn't a ruse on lady stork's part under the order of azula, then that was incredibly stupid. If she knows azula, she would know to fear her more than cercei, and she so easily just gave information.
if that wasn't a ruse on lady stork's part under the order of azula, then that was incredibly stupid. If she knows azula, she would know to fear her more than cercei, and she so easily just gave information.
1/21 c3 Guest
So… the new character you added into the world of ice and fire… are we actually going to get her pov? Are we going to understand how she entered the world? Read about how she did what she did? See her interactions with other prominent characters in the work?
Or are we just going to remain ever confused as fuck with poor descriptions, no idea on locations, next to no context for anything that is actually going on, and most importantly, seeing the new ‘plot’ play out from irrelevant, third party characters who are frankly uninteresting. Like, we care about the new character who has influenced the plot, not some random actress who frankly is boring as hell to read about instead of the fire throwing additional character in the world.
And the first chapter, what does it add to the story other than a word count and an instant turn off for anyone coming to read about the fire princess in westeros? Like who the fuck cares about a long ass chapter that boils down to ‘my lady, you and your son will escape dragonstone on different plain ships’. Ooooo. Wow! So fucking interesting! Like honestly. If you want a chapter that will be interesting, put it from the POV of the character YOU ADVERTISE as the main character, princess fire lady or whatever, and not some random ass knight who i think was in the kings guard, talking about shit nobody cares about. If you want to set the scene, have a brief monologue from the not mc but advertised mc before she smashes the redwyne fleet or something. Not mr boring fuckass taking about plain ships.
And where did all these fire nation dumabsses come from? Are they newly indoctrinated locals? From the actual fire nation? How did they get into the world? How did they create a underground base thing? Where did the ship come from? You give us fuck all context to anything, leave us all trying to guess just what in the everloving fuck is going on, and give us pov’s that explain fuck all while boring the shit out of your readers.
Like you get a 3/10 for the work so far. And those 3 points are simply due to the fact the english is good enough to read (despite the paragraphs being way too long) and the fact that the work,despite how tragically bad its execution is, does not seem like some 11 year olds wish fulfilment fantasy. So i mean, great job with that. But you lack the single thing that makes something a good work.
The ability to make your work interesting enough for someone to read. A real shame too, since i was quite interested to see how the premise played out, but after this incredibly abysmal and utterly disappointing start… well, im going to check out the other works that had caught my eye instead of yours.
And thats the issue you face. People will drop something boring to read something interesting instead of wasting their limited and precious time. If you flounder about in your first few chapters and fail to actually draw in any readers… well, you may write 300,000 words, but most wont get past 5,000. A wase of both your and their time.
So… the new character you added into the world of ice and fire… are we actually going to get her pov? Are we going to understand how she entered the world? Read about how she did what she did? See her interactions with other prominent characters in the work?
Or are we just going to remain ever confused as fuck with poor descriptions, no idea on locations, next to no context for anything that is actually going on, and most importantly, seeing the new ‘plot’ play out from irrelevant, third party characters who are frankly uninteresting. Like, we care about the new character who has influenced the plot, not some random actress who frankly is boring as hell to read about instead of the fire throwing additional character in the world.
And the first chapter, what does it add to the story other than a word count and an instant turn off for anyone coming to read about the fire princess in westeros? Like who the fuck cares about a long ass chapter that boils down to ‘my lady, you and your son will escape dragonstone on different plain ships’. Ooooo. Wow! So fucking interesting! Like honestly. If you want a chapter that will be interesting, put it from the POV of the character YOU ADVERTISE as the main character, princess fire lady or whatever, and not some random ass knight who i think was in the kings guard, talking about shit nobody cares about. If you want to set the scene, have a brief monologue from the not mc but advertised mc before she smashes the redwyne fleet or something. Not mr boring fuckass taking about plain ships.
And where did all these fire nation dumabsses come from? Are they newly indoctrinated locals? From the actual fire nation? How did they get into the world? How did they create a underground base thing? Where did the ship come from? You give us fuck all context to anything, leave us all trying to guess just what in the everloving fuck is going on, and give us pov’s that explain fuck all while boring the shit out of your readers.
Like you get a 3/10 for the work so far. And those 3 points are simply due to the fact the english is good enough to read (despite the paragraphs being way too long) and the fact that the work,despite how tragically bad its execution is, does not seem like some 11 year olds wish fulfilment fantasy. So i mean, great job with that. But you lack the single thing that makes something a good work.
The ability to make your work interesting enough for someone to read. A real shame too, since i was quite interested to see how the premise played out, but after this incredibly abysmal and utterly disappointing start… well, im going to check out the other works that had caught my eye instead of yours.
And thats the issue you face. People will drop something boring to read something interesting instead of wasting their limited and precious time. If you flounder about in your first few chapters and fail to actually draw in any readers… well, you may write 300,000 words, but most wont get past 5,000. A wase of both your and their time.