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5/4/2017 c1 15JDH1080
This was very different than the version I read the other day. I have won't say I prefer this over the first one and I won't say that I prefer the original my since the both tell a fundamentally different story. I did enjoy your descriptions, and the dialogue between Librom and Sortiara was interesting. Overall I enjoyed this it was pretty well written. I didn't spot any grammical errors or misspelling. Good job.

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