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for It's Like The First Time

1/24/2017 c1 izzyswag12
Great story so far
1/19/2017 c1 Alice
I'm not trying to be harsh, but dang.

First of all, don't use the story's summary area to talk. If you absolutely need to do an author's note, do it at the end of the story.

Secondly, ,'s go inside the ", not outside.

Thirdly, your spanish seems like you decided to plunk down some random spanish in the text. It just doesn't flow well. (And you call Santana by the descriptor "Latina" way way way too much.

And dude, do you know how american high schools work? Santana wouldn't get there an hour early and just hang out. Since she's a cheerleader, she's likely got practice before school starts. So if she's there that early, (it'd be earlier) that's what she's doing.

Next time, before you decide to post something online for other people to read, make sure it's error free, the plot makes sense, the characters are IN Character, and the details are correct.
I suggest you keep practicing, because that's the only way to get good. Practice practice practice (and remember you don't have to post what you write online!) Then when you feel like you have something that should be shared -find a beta.
1/18/2017 c1 MysteriousFacade
I like it. I think that you could do a lot with this and I hope that you won't give up writing it. Please do continue.

That being said I think you could do with looking it over once or twice before you post it. Read it over and see if you could change anything. Sometimes you don't even realise you made a mistake or phrased things the wrong way. I'm terrible at it myself! :D

I'll be watching, and waiting very patiently, for another chapter.

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