for A Wish on a Comet2/15/2017 c1 
19Estriella
Hey, I love the previous version, but I'm glad that I'll see how she goes to the island in the sky. I see that she knows 71 Volume One Piece, so a little further than the last. But I also noticed the lack of fruit. I hope that she will get it because I do not know how to imagine Rose as something other than logy wind. I also hope that she will be able before to tell the crew about her origin. Her unfounded fear in the previous version was the only thing that irritated me.
19EstriellaHey, I love the previous version, but I'm glad that I'll see how she goes to the island in the sky. I see that she knows 71 Volume One Piece, so a little further than the last. But I also noticed the lack of fruit. I hope that she will get it because I do not know how to imagine Rose as something other than logy wind. I also hope that she will be able before to tell the crew about her origin. Her unfounded fear in the previous version was the only thing that irritated me.
2/14/2017 c1 xxnomdeplume
I can't wait for the next chapter when she meets the Strawhats! I really loved Rose's relationship with Luffy in the original. It was so adorable! I think she made a smart choice taking the dinosaurs. :) Although, if she got found by Sanji, it wouldn't be all that bad... ;)
I can't wait for the next chapter when she meets the Strawhats! I really loved Rose's relationship with Luffy in the original. It was so adorable! I think she made a smart choice taking the dinosaurs. :) Although, if she got found by Sanji, it wouldn't be all that bad... ;)
2/14/2017 c1 One Star in a Lonely Sky
Ahh, great start. I can't wait to see where you go with the rewrite. I really loved the original and am so excited for the next chapter!
Ahh, great start. I can't wait to see where you go with the rewrite. I really loved the original and am so excited for the next chapter!
2/14/2017 c1 2Maistyria
Well, it's exciting to see you posting a rewrite. I look forward to read how you will make changes compared to your previous version.
I wanted to point out when you write "Roses hair"/"Roses freckled face", for example, grammatically, it is actually "Rose's hair"/Rose's freckled face". Her name is Rose and when referring to her as a possessive noun: singular you put it as "Rose's", while plural, where if for example her name is Roses, then it is written as "Roses' hair".
I know that you like to use parentheses to differentiate thoughts from speech, but grammatically it is better to use quotation marks (single - ' or double - ", it is your preference) and italicize the thought. If you want to emphasize a thought while in a flashback to make it stand out, then underline or bold it. Often times, it is good to use double quotation marks for speech and single quotation marks for thoughts. In this case, even in a flashback where the whole section may be italicized, thought and speech can still be distinguished using the single and double quotation marks. In addition, parentheses are usually used to allow a writer to provide additional information, and whatever the material inside the parentheses, it must not be grammatically integral to the surrounding sentence. For example: We verified her physic degree (Princeton, class of 1998), but her work history remains unconfirmed. If you take out the information in the parentheses, the sentence would still be grammatically correct and understandable.
Spelling and sentence structure wise, you are doing a good job. Overall, I do enjoy this story and hope to see where you will take it in the future. Cheers!
2MaistyriaWell, it's exciting to see you posting a rewrite. I look forward to read how you will make changes compared to your previous version.
I wanted to point out when you write "Roses hair"/"Roses freckled face", for example, grammatically, it is actually "Rose's hair"/Rose's freckled face". Her name is Rose and when referring to her as a possessive noun: singular you put it as "Rose's", while plural, where if for example her name is Roses, then it is written as "Roses' hair".
I know that you like to use parentheses to differentiate thoughts from speech, but grammatically it is better to use quotation marks (single - ' or double - ", it is your preference) and italicize the thought. If you want to emphasize a thought while in a flashback to make it stand out, then underline or bold it. Often times, it is good to use double quotation marks for speech and single quotation marks for thoughts. In this case, even in a flashback where the whole section may be italicized, thought and speech can still be distinguished using the single and double quotation marks. In addition, parentheses are usually used to allow a writer to provide additional information, and whatever the material inside the parentheses, it must not be grammatically integral to the surrounding sentence. For example: We verified her physic degree (Princeton, class of 1998), but her work history remains unconfirmed. If you take out the information in the parentheses, the sentence would still be grammatically correct and understandable.
Spelling and sentence structure wise, you are doing a good job. Overall, I do enjoy this story and hope to see where you will take it in the future. Cheers!
2/14/2017 c1 RoseRavenWillow RandomFangirl
I'll be honest, I skimmed the part with the foster family because I just plain hate people like them, even if they're important to a story, but I got the gist of it. I'd rather risk running from a T-rex than risk any of the Straw Hats wrath, unless it's Sanji than I'm safe.
I'll be honest, I skimmed the part with the foster family because I just plain hate people like them, even if they're important to a story, but I got the gist of it. I'd rather risk running from a T-rex than risk any of the Straw Hats wrath, unless it's Sanji than I'm safe.
2/14/2017 c1 Hawkeye
This is very nice also is rose still gonna have wind wind devil fruit powers because she is awesome when she uses it
This is very nice also is rose still gonna have wind wind devil fruit powers because she is awesome when she uses it
2/14/2017 c1 Arvas13
I LOVE THIS SO MUCH! Oh and Happy Valentines to Everyone who is enjoying the story as much as I am
I LOVE THIS SO MUCH! Oh and Happy Valentines to Everyone who is enjoying the story as much as I am
2/14/2017 c1 suntan140
Since rose is one the little garden arc that means maybe her bounty will become higher and she could become a supernova pirate :D
Since rose is one the little garden arc that means maybe her bounty will become higher and she could become a supernova pirate :D
2/14/2017 c1 56Generalhyna
this is gonna be really cool and gonna be I beech a lot different then before...though to add a change can my oc join? she joins way later like during the Albasta ark
but anyway Cant wait to see what is next since its different then before.
56Generalhynathis is gonna be really cool and gonna be I beech a lot different then before...though to add a change can my oc join? she joins way later like during the Albasta ark
but anyway Cant wait to see what is next since its different then before.
2/14/2017 c1 4DarkAzura09
oohhhh little garden! you took us way back there! I loved it! perfect job! can't wait to see this remake!<3
4DarkAzura09oohhhh little garden! you took us way back there! I loved it! perfect job! can't wait to see this remake!<3
2/14/2017 c1 14TheRominLegion
Great start on the rewrite, I really enjoyed the original version, but its nice that Rose will meet Vivi and Carue, will Rose has the same Devil Fruit or will that change as well.
14TheRominLegionGreat start on the rewrite, I really enjoyed the original version, but its nice that Rose will meet Vivi and Carue, will Rose has the same Devil Fruit or will that change as well.