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for New Overlord Vampire

1/24/2020 c1 4keller.blair1
So is mass effect warlord getting a rewrite
12/5/2019 c21 10godofmadness43
well things are gonna get crazy
12/5/2019 c21 4Gamelover41592
excellent work though I wish you had mizore and kumuru's mom meet takeshi's mom
11/27/2019 c1 SirSlaps
Sorry about the spelling bloody autocorrect
11/22/2019 c1 SirSlaps
For those that came to read an OverLand crossover this is definitely not an Overlord story and this story is confusing as hell nothing is explained, but that is just my opinion and this is just a warning
11/21/2019 c20 10godofmadness43
oh this is gonna be funny
11/21/2019 c20 4Gamelover41592
0-0 she's coming
10/25/2019 c19 User Closed
as someone who has played Overlord Raisin Hell and Overlord II, I feel like I'm reading more of a Rosario story than a crossover with Overlord?

First, did you actually play Overlord?

why does Takashi need Moka's blood?
in the manga Tsukune needed it because he was human and often seriously injured!

or why does Takashi need help from girls in each of his fights?

against the drawing teacher for example, as someone has already said he would force her to integrate his harem! not be saved by Moka and Kurumu!

for an Overlord to be kicked by an inferior monster and be forced to rely on the help of two girls is a shame unworthy of a TRUE Overlord!

and he is supposed to be the heir of the Overlord?
I hold my ribs trying not to scream so much laughter the situation is ridiculous!

if Takeshi had really been THE Overlord, he would impose his will on the monsters! reducing them to slavery, burning, manipulating, looting, scary and terrorizing them!
his reputation the previous sowing terror and desolation on his way!

and speaking of Overlord or is Gnarl the advisor?
where is his gauntlet supposed to allow him to control the minions?
where are they browns, reds, greens, blues Minions?

it's supposed to be a crossover with Overlord but I don't see any of that?

a REAL overlord would not be a pussy that needs the blood of a vampire or laments when you bite him! or who would need help or would be saved his ass by girls!

no, a TRUE Overlord would use his gauntlet to control his minions so they do the dirty work themselves!
eventually joining the fight if things go wrong or a tough opponent shows up.

this shit is not a crossover with Overlord because there is no real Overlord elements that would classify this story as a crossover!

no gauntlet, no Gnarl, no minions, Takeshi is unable to fight alone and is as useless as Tsukune, and would need help or get his ass saved by girls in the same way as Tsukune!

you should rename him Takeshit because he's just an oc pussy even more whiner than Tsukune!
10/6/2019 c19 10godofmadness43
oooh this is getting good
10/6/2019 c19 4Gamelover41592
Excellent work on this chapter and things are now looking up :)
8/16/2019 c1 Guest
Overlords Aren't pussys who cry in pain from being bitten by a vampire
6/7/2019 c10 Commissar Ciaphas Cain
this chapter is ridiculous, useless and above all totally cringeworthy! To too much to copy the manga, your oc who is supposedly "the Overlord heir" is in fact only a pale copy of Tsukune who doesn't say his name! and where are his minions supposed to serve him?

Why and how does the teacher manage to hypnotize Takeshi in the same way as Tsukune?

Tsukune was human, weak and helpless. Is not your oc supposed to be the Overlord who showed his powers a few days ago?
and yet the teacher acts exactly as if Takeshi was Tsukune!
Should not Overlord be immune? or the prof try to try to have an Overlord as a slave?

Worse, why is Takeshi being saved by Moka and Kurumu while he is THE Overlord?
I really wonder! is Takeshi really the "heir" to the Overlord or a pale copy of Tsukune who does not say his name?
I have the impression of reading the second so much its actions are similar to those of Tsukune!

If Tsukune had been the Overlord, the story would have been the same as yours. and even? I'm sure a good author would have created a different story.

I sincerely advise you to read Overlord stories like The Overlord at Yokai Academy (Tsukune is the Overlord), Overlord x Rwby or Kingdom Hearts and others mangas/animes.
because I DON'T have the feeling of reading an Overlord story, rather oc x rosario vampire harem.

as I said above to want to copy too much, Takeshi is only a Tsukune bis!
6/6/2019 c18 10godofmadness43
well that was fun
6/6/2019 c18 4Gamelover41592
that was excellent glad to see those three jerks get beaten up
6/2/2019 c18 6pedrofaria339
Like Kratos said: "Don't be sorry, BE BETTER!"
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