for A Surprise Twist9/20/2022 c1 Reader
A bit of too quick, but considering the length it is very good! Thank you :)
A bit of too quick, but considering the length it is very good! Thank you :)
7/30/2019 c1 
5Skydriane
Short and sweet. I've never seen a Laby fic done from this angle before.
Also, apparently Scrat from Ice Age got turned into a goblin, and you let him finally catch a snack :)
5SkydrianeShort and sweet. I've never seen a Laby fic done from this angle before.
Also, apparently Scrat from Ice Age got turned into a goblin, and you let him finally catch a snack :)
9/4/2018 c1 2tiedyefrog
I saw your comment on a different fanfic so I decided to check your stories out. I was not disappointed. You are doing really well. It is a bit cheesy with the whole “I love you thing” but I loved it!
2tiedyefrogI saw your comment on a different fanfic so I decided to check your stories out. I was not disappointed. You are doing really well. It is a bit cheesy with the whole “I love you thing” but I loved it!
7/18/2017 c1 35FrancesOsgood
Aww! This is so sweet and good. I love what you've done with the characters. The worm is perfect and Scrat is adorable. I love to see alternate takes on the story and this one is sweetly unique. Great job!
Btw, I have a goblin named Chib. We should get him and Scrat together for a playdate. :)
35FrancesOsgoodAww! This is so sweet and good. I love what you've done with the characters. The worm is perfect and Scrat is adorable. I love to see alternate takes on the story and this one is sweetly unique. Great job!
Btw, I have a goblin named Chib. We should get him and Scrat together for a playdate. :)
6/17/2017 c1 2Kinzichi
I know it's been a while since this was posted but this is super cute! I have been reading Labyrinth fics for a long time and this one is going in my archive of favorites!
2KinzichiI know it's been a while since this was posted but this is super cute! I have been reading Labyrinth fics for a long time and this one is going in my archive of favorites!
5/2/2017 c1 Jason B
Pros: Your narrative and dialogue is well balanced. The dialogue is believable, very natural. It's been a long time since I watched Labyrinth, I can't remember if Hoggle used curse-words. Still, the language flowed appropriately.
It was cool to see the emotional/empathetic side of Jareth...he seemed so detached sometimes...almost callous as I recall. nice change up.
It's also quite appropriate that you should write this now with the recent passing of David Bowie.
Cons: Watch your pronouns...there are quite a few. Alternate actions with descriptions of the scene/surroundings so that every sentence is not focused on the one of the characters. I always have to remind myself of that too. Tolkien was a master of descriptive narrative.
Good job. I like it. It was fun to read.
Pros: Your narrative and dialogue is well balanced. The dialogue is believable, very natural. It's been a long time since I watched Labyrinth, I can't remember if Hoggle used curse-words. Still, the language flowed appropriately.
It was cool to see the emotional/empathetic side of Jareth...he seemed so detached sometimes...almost callous as I recall. nice change up.
It's also quite appropriate that you should write this now with the recent passing of David Bowie.
Cons: Watch your pronouns...there are quite a few. Alternate actions with descriptions of the scene/surroundings so that every sentence is not focused on the one of the characters. I always have to remind myself of that too. Tolkien was a master of descriptive narrative.
Good job. I like it. It was fun to read.
5/2/2017 c1 giantgreengoat
This was a super fun read! The AU perspective took the story in a really interesting direction and the letter was perfect to tie it up neatly. Great job capturing the characters, loved that the guards were supposed to be firing blanks bit.
This was a super fun read! The AU perspective took the story in a really interesting direction and the letter was perfect to tie it up neatly. Great job capturing the characters, loved that the guards were supposed to be firing blanks bit.