Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for until we meet again

5/2 c2 1Acrwdof1
I’ve enjoyed your stories very much so far, especially the NCIS ones. However this one just doesn’t work for me. For one, you’ve missed the whole point of “Conscience of the King” and Kodos the Executionor. Kodos as the Governor, was faced with the worst possible situation as a leader of Tarsis IV. He had 8,000 colonists that he was responsible for. However a terrible ecological disaster wiped out the supplies, and Star Fleet was not supposed to be able to arrive with relive supplies FOR MONTHS! He had just enough for 4,000 to just BARELY SURVIVE UNTIL RELIEF ARRIVED, or to condemn the ENTIRE COLONY TO DEATH! He was faced with a no win situation. He ordered the executions because he felt he had no choice. It was only because some Star Fleet vessels NOT on normal patrol were able to arrive much earlier than anticipated, that Kodos became known as The Executioner. He lived with that agony on his conscience. It was finding out that his daughter insanely admired his past and was killing to protect him is what finally finished him. He was NOT like Krennic, a blood thirsty dictator.

Next, there is no way that they could have constructed a Death Star. In the Star Wars universe, it took twenty years and millions of workers and untold amounts a raw material to build. In the Star Trek universe, Kodos only had about 4,000 people and they were still busy wiping out remnants of the population who still resisted. So he didn’t have the necessary manpower. Plus this is in Federation territory, not the Empire’s, where such a project could have been hidden. Kodos and his minions would have been caught long before any such weapon could be made functional in Federation territory. Plus, after the Xindi probe attack, the Federation had a good idea on how to deal with such a weapon should it exist.

Wrong Kirk was used. Chris Pine’s Kirk would never have been on Tarsis IV. He hated his Step Father and never would have gone. Shatner’s Kirk was on Tarsis IV because he was accompanying his father, who he admired and loved dearly. Also, Pine’s Kirk was too much of a rebel to start of with. It was only because of Christopher Pike that he straightened his act out. While a natural leader, he would not accept or go by “Captain”. Boss or Chief maybe. You are just trying to show horn the character so we recognize who he is, when it is totally unnecessary. After all, a person would have had to live on a deserted island for 50 years not to recognize the name “James T. Kirk”. Kirk and Spock have been honored, spoofed, imitated, and just generally recognized as some of the most important characters in pop culture in the latter half and the beginning of this century!

Next, there is no “Force” in the Star Trek” universe. There are way too many diverse cultures with too many belief systems in Trek, as well as entities such as the Metrons or the Organians that many could mistake as Gods. The Force works in Star Wars because it is a unified galaxy that has 10,000 or more years of Jedi, so the Force is a well known and accepted concept.

There are a bunch of other things as well, such as Jyn as a Vulcan (even half-Vulcan) would be less than anxious for physical contact with others. As touch telepaths, they would dread the constant effort to maintain their own emotional control without being bombarded by the feelings of others. You didn’t have Jyn once even try to meditate. She acts way too Human. We’ve seen what happens to Spock when he loses it...

I applaud your effort, but I don’t think you researched your sources well enough, nor did you have the disparate cultures far enough apart [example: Jyn wore a dilithium crystal given by her mother around her neck (why did the term ‘Khyber’ suddenly pop into her mind as she struggled to organize her thoughts.)]
4/18/2018 c1 Guest
Omgsh I like Star Wars too let’s be friends
4/18/2018 c1 Halg
Quit school and write for a living I love this omgsh I’m your biggest fan praise the sun god
7/4/2017 c2 DarkDragonQueen0
God this is such an agonisingly good yet sad story. It really capture the essence of rogue one and slots it in so well with Tartarus IV. It is genuinely a pleasure to read such an original story. :D

Desktop Mode . Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service