for Transformers RID Bumblebee past and the war from Cybertron to Earth9/16/2023 c8 Guest
Love it I cant wait for the next ep.
Love it I cant wait for the next ep.
10/29/2017 c5 
1akurokulover123
oh my gosh. more more more more more more more more *continues to chant*
1akurokulover123oh my gosh. more more more more more more more more *continues to chant*
9/23/2017 c4 Guest
Good story, but there's some few things you can really improve on making it even better;
"I" - the letter "i" is used to used when it is someone's first point of view. Never lowercase them when they're talking what they're doing and saying. For example "i have never done this before" should be "I have never done this before."
Apostrophe ( ' ) - This punctuation is your best friend. It is used to indicate possessive or ommiting words. The great examples of them would be "I'm new", "I'll be", "he's", etc.
Period.- Another punctuation that is very important. It's a punctuation that indicates that there's a pause between sentences. It also indicates that it's the end of the sentence. This one is different than commas ( , ) because period is meant to stop the sentence to run. If you don't use periods more, you're going to have run-on sentences.
Spellings - there's a lot of misspellings and that is okay, because you're sounding them out to see how they're spelled. But English is quite complex when it comes to spelling, so here are some examples of how some are spelled:
"apointed" should be "appointed"
"aroun" is "around"
"yougest" is "youngest"
"gammed" should be spelled "jammed"
Etc, etc.
Take your time in spelling, don't hesitate on looking up for words to see if they're spelled right. Dictionary is your big best friend for spelling.
Homograph and Homophones - this is a very complex spelling, but very simple. Homograph is a word that spells the same but has different sounds (like bass the voice and bass the fish) and Homophones is a word that sounds the same, but is spelled differently (like two/to/too).
All of themails has different meanings, so be careful when you write them down together.
Paragraphs - in literature itself, it's really important to make paragraphs. Paragraphs means new scenes or new subject change, and it can also means "look how much you can read easily than a big wall of text".
Paragraphs also helps separates the conversations because you're switch from one character to another. You just need to be careful on who's saying who.
Not many people would read a fanfiction or a story that has big wall of text. It's messy, clumpy, and unprofessional. While the rule might not apply in some certain countries, English is big on making paragraphs.
I think that is all I can provide you, I wish you luck on making this story even better. It's a good read, you just have make it even better wIthaca improvements.
Good story, but there's some few things you can really improve on making it even better;
"I" - the letter "i" is used to used when it is someone's first point of view. Never lowercase them when they're talking what they're doing and saying. For example "i have never done this before" should be "I have never done this before."
Apostrophe ( ' ) - This punctuation is your best friend. It is used to indicate possessive or ommiting words. The great examples of them would be "I'm new", "I'll be", "he's", etc.
Period.- Another punctuation that is very important. It's a punctuation that indicates that there's a pause between sentences. It also indicates that it's the end of the sentence. This one is different than commas ( , ) because period is meant to stop the sentence to run. If you don't use periods more, you're going to have run-on sentences.
Spellings - there's a lot of misspellings and that is okay, because you're sounding them out to see how they're spelled. But English is quite complex when it comes to spelling, so here are some examples of how some are spelled:
"apointed" should be "appointed"
"aroun" is "around"
"yougest" is "youngest"
"gammed" should be spelled "jammed"
Etc, etc.
Take your time in spelling, don't hesitate on looking up for words to see if they're spelled right. Dictionary is your big best friend for spelling.
Homograph and Homophones - this is a very complex spelling, but very simple. Homograph is a word that spells the same but has different sounds (like bass the voice and bass the fish) and Homophones is a word that sounds the same, but is spelled differently (like two/to/too).
All of themails has different meanings, so be careful when you write them down together.
Paragraphs - in literature itself, it's really important to make paragraphs. Paragraphs means new scenes or new subject change, and it can also means "look how much you can read easily than a big wall of text".
Paragraphs also helps separates the conversations because you're switch from one character to another. You just need to be careful on who's saying who.
Not many people would read a fanfiction or a story that has big wall of text. It's messy, clumpy, and unprofessional. While the rule might not apply in some certain countries, English is big on making paragraphs.
I think that is all I can provide you, I wish you luck on making this story even better. It's a good read, you just have make it even better wIthaca improvements.
7/20/2017 c1 SparkySparkfire
There aren't any RID fanfiction where Bee is a femme from what I've see, so your story has sparked my interest. I hope you continue.
There aren't any RID fanfiction where Bee is a femme from what I've see, so your story has sparked my interest. I hope you continue.