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for The Night Unfurls (UNDERGOING REVISION)

6/13/2019 c12 1YeTianshi
You know, it may be an exaggeration, but given Kyril's situation, all the time and effort he's put in to help these people and one errant rumor somehow turns into disappointment and anger. Wouldn't have been surprised if he told all to fuck off and simply left them to rot... There's only so much ungratefulness one can take.
6/13/2019 c10 YeTianshi
You know, for a minute there I could just imagine Kyril standing in a field of corpses, the entire army dead, and his reinforcements only just arriving to see the end-results. It'd be a wallpaper worthy picture xD

Really love your writing :D
6/13/2019 c3 YeTianshi
Huh... I really wasn't expecting him to take up the offer of becoming a Knight... Seems like kind of a step-down really.
Nice chapter, I was kind of expecting Olga to take up interest in the Hunter rather than Celestine.
6/10/2019 c33 9Aemon.D.Boneless
My dude I gotta tell you that this is hands down one of the BEST stories I've ever read. And you one of the best writers I've ever found. I gotta tell you never in my wildest dreams did I think I'd find such an amazing story from a God damn H-Series! Seriously I was expecting this to be a non stop sex and Gary stu OC-ness but you actually made me care about the characters who faced and overcome actual struggles, gave me and actually interesting story and even the overpowered MC makes sense. Hell even the damn love square is appealing and I fucking hate harems. Honestly keep up the amazing work and let me tell you if you ever decided to go for professional writer I day go for it cause this story is awesome
6/8/2019 c33 Guest
6/6/2019 c15 4Kian Xki
good story

the only problem is that i am confused with the age and relative size of the aprendices

when found they give me the impresion of alley kids no older than 12 and stheal for survival

but after becoming Hunters they are 200cm muscle warriors no younger than 18

even Soran went from 10 years to at least 15 and has yet to be taken as a true trainee

is this to say that they are not inocent? were their initial ages actually older than i thought? or is this merelly the result of Hunter Set being that awesome

is not really a problem but i am wondering if i should be thinking of them as

a) precosious chirden (less than 12) following the style of Yoda to kill things twice their size

b) teenageers with actutide (14~16), like teentitans cartoon and stronger than your average adult despite being slim and sighly smaller

c) young adults (18~20) who are killing machines and share the apperance of comic superheroes
6/5/2019 c33 Hunger Man
Will something actually happen this time? Every single chapter I keep hoping maybe SOMETHING will go wrong and Kyril will be threatened, or have to actually try, but so far he has not faced an ounce of difficulty, as even the closest thing to a Boss Fight in this story ended with Kyril just showing his real face to the villain. It can be sometimes hard to care about your story, which is most of the time very entertaining, when the protagonist that holds the entire cast together is such a boring Marty Stu.

I am well aware that he's a Great One, but as the skirmishes earlier with Luu Luu had shown, this world has characters that are capable of gathering that power for themselves as well, if not on the same level as Kyril. That alone makes fertile room for all sorts of possibilities for the villains to evolve and get on the same level as Kyril instead of just being curbstomped.

As much as I like the characters, the complete lack of any meaningful conflict meant I was reading and skipping the battle scenes for the sake of the slice-of-life aspects because they were infinitely more fun than seeing Bloodborne Kirito brood as he slaughters everything without a sweat because he's SO strong and EVERY girl loves him and deep down he CARES for the Dark Elf Queen that basically sold her people out for slavery even thought one of Kyril's most noticeable traits is his intolerance towards evil and how he tortures and murders anyone who even thinks about preying on the weak. Meanwhile, he slaughters nobles for thinking about picking a side that they think will win the war when it comes to the Black Dogs, but fucking OLGA is the exception?

Look, I like the fic. Almost all the characters are interesting and fun to read about. The ONE exception is One Punch Kyril, which is frustrating because, as the protagonist, HE'S THE ONE WE SHOULD BE CARING FOR THE MOST! Please please PLEASE either find a way to make things at least a bit hard for him by nerfing his powers a bit, or just buffing the antagonists during this final arc.

If ALL this epic buildup of over 33 freaking chapters, all those scenes of Hunter recruitment and training, all this romantic tension of the two Queens worrying about Kyril dying, all those cameos of great warriors from neither Bloodborne nor Kuroinu getting involved into the battle for the final round, all that lampshade about Kyril being actually VULNERABLE after getting shot in the eye, all those Black Dog hints that Volt himself (who not only once fought Kyril to a stand-still with nothing but his sword in an earlier chapter) is getting closer to coming in contact with Insight through the mages he employs and turning into a true threat, if it ALL ends up being yet another curb-stomp fest as Kyril casually walks up to Volt, beats him up and then mind-rapes him into submission like he did with every other major villain so far, I'll be seriously disappointed in the wasted potential of this story.

But it you pull it off in the final chapters, I'll be putting this one in my favourites, that's for sure. I want to see Kyril's apprentices have some character development and decide which path in life they want to take. I want Olga to genuinely pay for her sins, and not have Kyril white-knight her crimes away just because he caaaaares about her so much. I want to see what might happen to the next lineage of Hunters, and how Celestine will handle things once peace is achieved and Kyril can't just poof away all her problems with his powers. I want to find closure for everyone that isn't Kyril.

I don't criticize this story because I utterly hated it, I criticize it because it is a diamond in the rough, and if the finishing touches are applied in the final chapters, it could end so satisfyingly that all of its flaws could be easily solved! You have shown time and time again that you have a great writing style. Don't trip now, when it can end gracefully and become something really amazing!
6/1/2019 c33 PasiveNox
5/31/2019 c33 17Ben56
The end is near i supose, i know Vault and all the patetic bastards of the Black Dogs will suffer before they die, and hopefuly...Kiril will find a place to live and womans to love...soon whit his childrens to. I know Bloodborne always have tragic endings, but for once that can change. Thanks for the new chapter, see you in the next one.
5/31/2019 c33 10MidnightFenrir
Oh ? Yukimura Sanada is taking the stage ? Looking forward to him and Kyril kicking some ass together.

And is it just me, or is it the Nioh version of Sanada ?
5/30/2019 c33 HeidenGrey
so happy to see this updated!
5/29/2019 c33 Tribus
This is a fucking great fanfic.

It’s honestly weird to say that when it derives from a hentai.
5/29/2019 c33 Tron1112
Hot dam... I can not wait for summer updates
5/29/2019 c33 Guest
Yaaay! New chapter! Love your work, thank you so much! :D
5/29/2019 c33 Neema Amiry
Been a while
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