for Between Floors Six and Seven11/10/2021 c15 InsomniacticReader
Let me start by saying I have never commented on a story as I typically try to use this as a forum to be outside of myself and my daily life. However, I am making a single exception now.
This feels….I was going to say mildly but is actually wildly racist and playing on awful tropes of black women. I am going off of the coded name you gave the character Chantrelle and don’t appreciate the insidious method of insinuation. I was totally enjoying the story up until this point and now can’t stomach finishing it.
I don’t know your identity but I can only assume you are white and do not really know any black women. If this is untrue and your are a black woman, please feel free to stop reading now and I wish you the best in your self-identity journey.
I am white but feel the need to point out (especially if you are also white) that if you’re going to write black characters into a story you should avoid using inaccurate and harmful stereotypes that paint all black women as loud, hyper-sexualized, and/or ostentatious.
Yes, obviously loud, hyper-sexualized, and ostentatious women exist in every ethnic group; but to make the only black character in you story so starkly and descriptively so is uneducated and tone-deaf.
Additionally since I’m already breaking my rule of no engagement, you should think of utilizing a dictionary and avoiding colloquialisms you are not really familiar with as there are some mistakes that take one out of the story.
I do not mean this to derail your writing and would encourage you to continue to do so for as long as it gives you pleasure. Though perhaps, with more thoughtfulness to avoid perpetuating damaging and morally degrading stereotypes.
Let me start by saying I have never commented on a story as I typically try to use this as a forum to be outside of myself and my daily life. However, I am making a single exception now.
This feels….I was going to say mildly but is actually wildly racist and playing on awful tropes of black women. I am going off of the coded name you gave the character Chantrelle and don’t appreciate the insidious method of insinuation. I was totally enjoying the story up until this point and now can’t stomach finishing it.
I don’t know your identity but I can only assume you are white and do not really know any black women. If this is untrue and your are a black woman, please feel free to stop reading now and I wish you the best in your self-identity journey.
I am white but feel the need to point out (especially if you are also white) that if you’re going to write black characters into a story you should avoid using inaccurate and harmful stereotypes that paint all black women as loud, hyper-sexualized, and/or ostentatious.
Yes, obviously loud, hyper-sexualized, and ostentatious women exist in every ethnic group; but to make the only black character in you story so starkly and descriptively so is uneducated and tone-deaf.
Additionally since I’m already breaking my rule of no engagement, you should think of utilizing a dictionary and avoiding colloquialisms you are not really familiar with as there are some mistakes that take one out of the story.
I do not mean this to derail your writing and would encourage you to continue to do so for as long as it gives you pleasure. Though perhaps, with more thoughtfulness to avoid perpetuating damaging and morally degrading stereotypes.
11/1/2021 c1 Raz Alas
Oh dear yet another writer that's determined to go down with their sinking ship ...
Not so much titanic but more totes-tragic as it so sad really ... like this silly fic ...
Oh dear yet another writer that's determined to go down with their sinking ship ...
Not so much titanic but more totes-tragic as it so sad really ... like this silly fic ...
10/13/2021 c17 Guest
I love this story! It’s fascinating game and very intriguing, and it’s one of the best I’ve ever seen! It has a warm and touching side to it but also a fair side of melodrama! It’s really humorous and fabulous at the same time! I’m lucky to have read it! Thank you for writing this beautiful story. ️️️
I love this story! It’s fascinating game and very intriguing, and it’s one of the best I’ve ever seen! It has a warm and touching side to it but also a fair side of melodrama! It’s really humorous and fabulous at the same time! I’m lucky to have read it! Thank you for writing this beautiful story. ️️️
10/13/2021 c12 Mina Liu
Merlin I’m so sorry for what happened to you. I know it sounds insincere but I kind of know the feeling. My father died when I was five and my mother never remarried. I snooped and saw in her iPhone a few years ago one of her “friend” confessed “his undying love” for her. She refused. And later I heard them arguing on late nights. About a few months ago, the man, who was a drinker, came here despite my mom’s warning not to come here if he drinks. But he refused and banged on the door and yelled obscene stuff to my mom. My brother and I were so scared. But my mom just told him calmly, again and again, to beat it while the man told her she doesn’t deserve to live as a human being. Of course, with all that shouting, our nice neighbors called the police and the coward left. But I wish I could say that she cut him off, but sadly she couldn’t, as they are work partners. But I’m glad for you that you left the person. Nobody deserves to be treated like that. Oh, and also, I really love how you write. You’re one hell of an amazing author. Endless love from one corner of the world~
Merlin I’m so sorry for what happened to you. I know it sounds insincere but I kind of know the feeling. My father died when I was five and my mother never remarried. I snooped and saw in her iPhone a few years ago one of her “friend” confessed “his undying love” for her. She refused. And later I heard them arguing on late nights. About a few months ago, the man, who was a drinker, came here despite my mom’s warning not to come here if he drinks. But he refused and banged on the door and yelled obscene stuff to my mom. My brother and I were so scared. But my mom just told him calmly, again and again, to beat it while the man told her she doesn’t deserve to live as a human being. Of course, with all that shouting, our nice neighbors called the police and the coward left. But I wish I could say that she cut him off, but sadly she couldn’t, as they are work partners. But I’m glad for you that you left the person. Nobody deserves to be treated like that. Oh, and also, I really love how you write. You’re one hell of an amazing author. Endless love from one corner of the world~
8/23/2021 c9 FrozenTaho
This is such a fun story. Enjoying it immensely. But i have to say, the way Astoria told the Draco’s back story is so unnatural. No one converses like that. Might have worked better as a flashback, since it’s written in the same style the author writes, instead of Astoria narrating it like she’s reading a book.
This is such a fun story. Enjoying it immensely. But i have to say, the way Astoria told the Draco’s back story is so unnatural. No one converses like that. Might have worked better as a flashback, since it’s written in the same style the author writes, instead of Astoria narrating it like she’s reading a book.
8/14/2021 c17 Guest
Nice piece of writing ️
Nice piece of writing ️
8/11/2021 c17 
3HarryPGinnyW4eva
Brava! You hit on every point and wrapped them up so well! I am so happy for all of them, especially the waiter at the restaurant! lol The addition of Mildred was perfection. :-) Thank you for every word of this fun story! HG4eva
3HarryPGinnyW4evaBrava! You hit on every point and wrapped them up so well! I am so happy for all of them, especially the waiter at the restaurant! lol The addition of Mildred was perfection. :-) Thank you for every word of this fun story! HG4eva
8/2/2021 c17 Dee P. Rotor
An elevator.
Only possible way to make Malfoy go down on anything.
An elevator.
Only possible way to make Malfoy go down on anything.
8/1/2021 c17 Karen the Karen
Downerish ending. Characters were just going through the motions. Or so I felt.
Downerish ending. Characters were just going through the motions. Or so I felt.
8/2/2021 c17 SpaceKace
I lovvveeeedd all of the loose ends you tied up! Very very fun! You have such a whimsical writing style that I so appreciate! Thank you so much for this cheeky story!
I lovvveeeedd all of the loose ends you tied up! Very very fun! You have such a whimsical writing style that I so appreciate! Thank you so much for this cheeky story!