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for The Raven's Plan

5/4 c45 LoveThisStoryBUT
So, this is not within the top 20 of all fic I have ever read, but is is within the top 3 of all game of thrones fics I have ever read. Your ending with the night king killing everyone and winning before time travel shenanigans happen is better than the canon ending, and please don't let what happened to that series hurt your drive. I will be reading whatever you write, and trust that you will continue writing.
5/4 c44 CarolsSister
Better that little Sam not come to be than the way the Red Witch took him out.
5/4 c43 41Black' Victor Cachat
Very well done with Ned putting the Karstarks in their place. Because yeah, he is not ASKING, he is COMMANDING, as they swore to obey. It is NOT a negotiation. Meanwhile Alys is freaked out that she very well might end up Lady Karstark while stuck within an even younger body than the last time.

Really enjoyed rereading all the humour with people reacting to Jon getting those legendary blades from his "uncle," and then realized it is a joke which could go throughout the continent as people hear how 'Ned' gave him those swords. Robert is even more livid of course, but those who live by the Game of Thrones are left wondering just how far back the Starks have been planning for this. Those who actually know Jon are all enjoying the joke.

Nice bit with Daenerys and loyalist aristocrat; you really got into his arrogant but indeed Loyal mind well. Although her having to repeat what happened in the alternate future for the upteenth time makes me feel she and Jon should have people make up pamphlets for people to read :-P

Shireen is a treat to read by the way, and glad to see she is getting a better life. Easily one of my favourite parts.

Interesting stuff with Ser Barristan, but poor him having to deal with a king who is actually capable of genuine friendships with those 'lower' than him. Complete contrast to the ones he is used to, and confusing :-P Although yeah, Jon is probably going to have to put into place someone who tries being too familiar.

Just imagining now how stories of Sam reach the greater continent, how he is a fearsome warrior who died fighting the Night King in equal combat. A genius politician who conquered the Reach without a single death (except for the Maesters, but who cares about them). A true Tarly, no GREATER than any Tarly before him, and fearsomely devout to his King. People start imagining him as basically what Tywin was to Robert (if Robert was also a more competent king). Tyrion finds the whole comparison quite entertaining, but does not really dispute it.

One thing you could do with Qyburn while waiting on Jon's return, is him being questioned about what happened in his timeline in King's Landing. Their information is a bit sparse there, and the fact he is blatantly honest about his own crimes actually makes even Davos willing to take his word for it. Except he also reveals that Varys' spy network is heavily based upon basically child slaves, which causes issues for the Targaryan inner circle
5/3 c45 The stoic
Awesome! I just found the three days ago and by far one of the best I’ve read! Hope to see more from ya!
5/2 c44 Black' Victor Cachat
Two of my favourite parts are noting the irony of how Bracken and Blackwood would only end their feud if it was the end of the world, and OH LOOK WHAT HAPPENED! Second being that Shireen notes she is apparently the only sane person in her family.
5/2 c45 Black' Victor Cachat
This is an incredibly well done and detailed story!

Nice bits where you address the faults of the alternate future, and working hard though to avert it, while serious issues still crop up. Politics well done too, and oh man it is NOT going to end well with Robert...

I do recommend a Beta though, as there are a bunch of grammar and spelling errors which slip through.

Some suggestions (not expecting you to use them, I hope they at least inspire you in some manner):
-Lyanna Mormont is sent to Winterfell, ostensibly so she can continue to support House Stark, but everyone knows it is to get some space from her, because she is CRANKY at being stuck in her old body. Sansa welcomes her with open arms, and the circumstances allows her to be more open with the girl, and she quickly befriends the other 'kids.' Also freaks out the adults to see such and eloquent 'child' whose glare can make a man back up.

-When learning that he is going to be meeting Lyanna Mormont, Jon tells Ser Barristan that later he can put in the Book of Brothers how his first major task in serving King Jon I was protecting him from a little girl. Somebody who knows her, notes that Jon is only half-joking :-P

-Showing Davos in his role as Hand of the King, and Catelyn being forced to confront how this 'upjumped commoner' is able to order around various lords without issue, and is indeed good at his job.

-Jon working to pass through the laws that women and children in the North are to start learning self-defense for fighting Wights. Ned and others who do not Remember surprised to learn most Northern Houses have already started to varying degrees. Sam and Tyrion also getting that started

-As part of preparing his plans for a certain maester, Tyrion gathers together some bards for the express purpose of getting a song ready. Telling them it is for the murder of his mother, gives them enough starting material.

-The Isle of Faces is made secure. Even if time travel is impossible now without the mad red priestess, it is still a very powerful place of magic. Noted how it is being made more fortified than Riverrun, with forces from other lands heading in.

-Gendry is not just remaking Needle, he is making it better, as it is now perfectly balanced for the women Arya will grow to be.

-Non-combatants are being moved south as winter arrives sooner. Not everybody, and no one fails to contribute in some way in the North, but the fact remains they can get people to the Riverlands where a) less likely to be turned into an enemy combatant, and b) easier on the food supplies where the main fighting needs to be constrained to.

-Castle Black is basically being torn apart to go through any and all possible records about the White Walkers. Done before of course, but now less desperate, and more organized, with more people who know their letters. Happening at the Citadel as well.
4/30 c45 1Fyr RedNight
Great work on this story so far!

The core plot as a whole is a very much interesting concept, I look forward to read how it'll go from there!
4/23 c1 Guest
oh no! a little demon spawn who is the product of father daughter incestuous rape is not to be born! how unfortunate!
4/23 c1 Guest
how the fuck would arya fucking handle a massive sword like dark sister. the reason she gets needle is because that specific type of sword would be best fit for someone as small as her. her build is likely to never support the wielding of a sword like dark sister. jon snow, with all his 'hidden' strength in the books, cannot properly optimize the use of a long sword, yet you tell me a skinny twig like arya would? go shove your own dick up your arse
4/21 c35 BlazeStryker
Tyrion has of course realized that the poisons that cost Joanna her life also made him the Halfman and guaranteed Tywin's hatred of him. I suspect he's going to buy goats.
4/21 c32 BlazeStryker
I think I understand. Viserys was getting the madness poison in the first run, wasn't he?
4/21 c28 BlazeStryker
Oh, it's well past pies now. We have Lommy! "What the %&%%'s a Lommy?" Even with the Hound elsewhere, this means she may turn preventative on every %&%&ing chicken in the room sometime soon.
4/21 c45 110Right What Is Wrong
It's not abandoned?! Hallelujah!

Nice chapter. I can see the point of the Guest who said Dark Sister should be Dany's, but... I mean, it's named "Dark Sister". Sounds made for Arya, heh.

Going to be interesting as the confrontation with the Others nears... I suspect BOTH sides have been preparing for this...
4/9 c45 CarolsSister
Robb had better swing well with that sword. Going out amongst the wights is no time to muck around, and if the Night's King decides to make an early entrance Valyrian steel may be the difference between dying north of the wall or making it back through alive. After all, he has to survive at least until he meets Talisa again.
4/9 c36 CarolsSister
Surprised at his reaction? Oh, not in the least. As to what he will do next? Long term planning is not Robert's strong suit, so I can see him steaming off north with no more of a plan than just smashing anything in his way.
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