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for Inconceivable

12/4/2019 c5 Meh
Is this your first story? I couldn’t even get through the first chapter. It’s a good concept, but awfully patchy and doesn’t flow right. Look into getting a beta to help you arrange your story in a way that is conducive to a you and the readers.
6/11/2019 c3 Guest
West coast? They're in Florida.

And why is she such a bitch to Emmett? Did I miss something?
1/27/2019 c4 acw1
1/26/2019 c4 cheshire15
I'm not sure why she winked at Alice when they ignored her and surprised she gave him the time of day by how he humiliated her and she almost died. Glad to see an update. Keep it coming
7/19/2018 c1 Guest
So all she had to do was blurt out " I didn't get the abortion" Once heard it can't be unheard.
Too much unnecessary drama.
7/16/2018 c3 Mick
Emmett says that she's been on the West Coast, but she has been in Florida? Florida is on the Atlantic and Gulf of Mexico. California is on the West Coast. The story has a good start, but details are important.
7/15/2018 c2 Scattycow
How can a sixteen year old afford a $500 flight just like that?
7/15/2018 c1 Scattycow
Really overdramatic. It’s like a South American soap opera.
All this ‘killing my baby’ and collapsing to the knees is silly.
Sixteen is ridiculously young to have a child, you’re a child yourself and abortion is the best option.
12/18/2017 c2 Solangelo Lover 292
Thank you so much for writing this. I can’t wait for your next update! _
12/18/2017 c2 2Sunflower Fran
So many chances to talk but it never happened.
12/17/2017 c1 Solangelo Lover 292
Please continue! _
12/16/2017 c1 8teambellaedward
12/16/2017 c1 2Sunflower Fran
Oh, wow.
So Edward thinks she had the abortion, but ...
12/16/2017 c1 simbacurls
Sounds interesting. First chapter already have me tearing up. Poor Bella
12/16/2017 c1 Corr5092
good start

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