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for Brooding Responsibilities

11/14/2020 c13 ElyseSyrova
Just getting around to reading this finally, and enjoying it a lot more than I thought I would.I especially enjoyed just how gut-wrenching the loss of Akane/Eclipse and Nabiki/Yuki, both person and mind, to Alexia was. That sort of bitter-acrid-burnt-brown/mud textured emotional dilemma is rare, difficult to achieve, and nightmarishly difficult to bring home to a satisfying climax or conclusion, something you managed quite well, comparing favorably with some of my favorites. I can't wait to read the rest now!
7/27/2019 c1 The foxxx
This feels more like the second or third chapter in a story rather than the first, a lot of info is just straight up missing.
It should have started with ranma & Pluto's conviction, as well as how ranma became a sailor scout.. show don't tell.
7/27/2019 c5 The foxxx
Why would ranma feel betrayed if him becoming a sailor scout was an accident?
Hell in a previous chapter he acknowledges that it was an accident, to to be betrayed there has to be an act of betrayal.
7/27/2019 c3 The foxxx
What's the time frame, why did this need to be in Canada, why dose ranma have such a hard time believing that an organization that admits to arranging "accidents" for people would be willing to arrange an "accident" for someone, why is kasumi the mercenary and not nabiki the character who's nickname is mercenary girl, why ranma so cool with trusting a shadowy orginazion of killers in the first place, why are akane and nabiki living in Canada if kasumi is the only one of them that works for the shadowy orginazion, why would ranma's dad want him to attend school as a girl when is whole deal is make in ranma into a man among men?
5/25/2019 c13 1beast5200
Well. This was a wild ride. I didn't know what to think about this story at first. The beginning was a bit slow in pacing and I almost dropped it.

BOY an i glad I didn't.

This story is actually really fun and exciting. I really enjoy the characters and how this WIC company is set it. Things are a bit convenient... but it only stretches my suspension of disbelief not quite exceeding it.

I kinda wish Usagi was in this a bit more than she was. But hey this is only book one and I shall be beginning book 2 very soon.

I don't know what the state of this story was before the rewrite but I can say that in the state it is in now it is well done all around. Nothing really sticks out for me to complement nor critique. It's a well above average fun story.

Thank you
3/5/2019 c1 Steve
I don't have any idea what the fuck did you did there and honestly? I don't even want to know.
2/4/2019 c13 40deathgeonous
This has always been not only one of my favorite Ranma fics of all time, but one of my very favorite fics period of all time. So, when I saw that you were rewriting this fic, I decided to wait and reread the whole thing when you were done. Sadly, I was, busy, very, very busy in early December when you did finish with the rewrite, so I'm starting rereading it now. Now this rewrite was good, but... there were some slip ups, sentences that were not completed and had obviously missing words and content. Also there were conversations and explanations that went on for multiple paragraphs that had some changed content followed by unchanged content that should have been changed as well to flow and make sense. That said I do approve of the two chapters you removed. The crossover chapter was a cute Omake chapter, but didn't truly belong in the fic. The other one though, Well, I always thought that the 'History of the Company' Chapter was in the wrong spot. I just made no sense being where you originally put it. If I may make a suggestion, why don't you put it as a single chapter post/fic and list it as the Return Part 0? I had always been under the impression that it would have made a better prologue than chapter, 6? Was it? Anyways, thank you ever so much for not only writing this in the first place, but taking the time to rewrite it to match what came latter on, and bye for now. Now, now onto Part Two!
12/5/2018 c11 fellow
I love all the bits with Setsuna. :)
12/5/2018 c10 fellow
I like how you are writing Ukyou here.
12/5/2018 c5 fellow
I really like non-crazy Nodoka in Ranma stories. You have done it very well here.
12/5/2018 c4 fellow
I liked the bit with the business card at the end.
12/5/2018 c3 fellow
Usagi's lesbian daydreams, and her issues with them, are amusing.
12/5/2018 c1 fellow
This writing seems quite a bit smoother than in The Return. I look forward to seeing where you take this.
4/24/2018 c8 2Raved Thrad
1/17/2018 c6 Volendi
While I despair at yet another stall in the most excellent story of Sailor!Demon!Ranmachan, I am very glad to see it being split up into separate books for each arc! Of course, revisions and updates are a good thing too, look at how much better the Dark Tower series is since Stephen King went back and revised/rewrote a bunch of it. While these stories don't have the creep factor of Stephen King's works, I think they deserve to be mentioned in comparison to such a great author. Much enjoyment has been had from reading these stories, and you should really think about trying to do something publishable! (it's been said that 50 shades of grey started as a twilight fanfic). Looking forward to the series continuing, and wanted you to know your stories are very fun and original, and very enjoyable! _
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