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8/20 c12 mumphie
He didn't use Peter to free Sirius? Grrrr
8/18 c21 ThePhenoix11
Dam hagrid hulk mode using a armor suit as a club is kinda funny tho it might have been more badass if someone transfigured the suit around him for a charging half giant knight cue vodys forces shitting there pants haha.
8/14 c15 HellsMaji
So.. is Harry even the main character anymore? Last chapter was all about making fun of him and how little he knows about girls and other things. And this chapter was all about how useless Harry is and how much better Hermione and Fleur are than him. Jesus.
8/13 c10 HellsMaji
Just to let you know, in one paragraph you have Harry and Fleur walking away from the stunned Slytherins and back towards the school. And in the very next paragraph they're walking right up to the Slytherins instead.
8/13 c9 HellsMaji
So fleur can prank Malfoy when he's rude to Harry no problem, but Harry pranks someone rude to her and suddenly it's "I can defend my own honor" huh? Also, no chance that both of them, especially fleur, forgot to teach Harry to dance when they've known about the ball for months. But oh well.
8/8 c3 JStuczy
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8/8 c1 JStuczy
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8/8 c1 JStuczy
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8/7 c1 muzjun no kishi
holy fuck, this chapter felt like I just read about thirty really good chapters, it's honestly a little frighting how you paid in full what you said this story was about, most of the time people build around it and they loose what drew people in, you haven't, good job. thanks for the really good reading material
8/2 c21 17Lerris
The biggest issue I see with this story is yes, her tricking a marriage does make sense, giving how much danger he was in, and not having another option. She was also young, and young are bound to be impetuous. Pretty much after that, it didn't make sense for him to remain in Hogwarts. Even if Fleur didn't see it, her parents would have. They might have even helped transfer all of Harry's friends. Sure they might have had to return for the tasks, may have even stayed at Hogwarts through the end of the third task, but after that there is just no way Fleur's parents would not have done everything possible to forbid them returning. No parent would truly accept that it was Harry's job to fight these things. Another thing I don't think helped your story was all the scenes requiring the rating. They seemed excessive.
8/2 c17 Lerris
Harry was hit by a killling curse. The Harry's mom thing is weird, but I just don't see him being a horcrux anymore. Basically, it would take considerable work to make that still be plausible.
8/2 c16 Lerris
Slytherin is interesting. Ambition is not, in itself, evil. Ambition with no limits however, generally is. Slytherin has a reputation, so I suppose it could be causing it to select only those who are okay with that reputation, or at least brought up to embrace that particular path. Even with that though, there are bound to be exceptions that are not girls, since the Hat is presumably selecting by what it was made to.

That all being said, I'm just not sure I buy the bad guys not being good enough at politics to keep their base happy. Good doesn't defend bad behavior because its bad. Evil also doesn't usually defend someone like Umbridge, because its just easier to throw her under the bus to take the fallout.
8/2 c15 Lerris
Um, Umbridge used lethal spells on students without any being fired at her. As a comparison, imagine in America a teacher of that year students brought in a gun and fired at students as many rounds as Umbridge did. Now, I just don't see that teacher having a job the next day, let alone the president praising the teachers actions. Needless to say with that much evidence there is a lot they can and should be doing. First of all writing home about exactly what happened and sending the information to every single parent in the school would be perhaps the first start. Fudge would probably be lynched and so would Umbridge, but, well it is better than letting an attempted murdered continue to teach students. The Daphne scene worked I guess, but, well, I just can't move past Albus's ineffective actions.
8/2 c14 Lerris
The biggest issue I see with this story is I'd really recommend you add something at the start where all the characters are a few years older, or you change the triwizard arc to a later year, etc.
8/2 c21 MrCaspian
Finally caught up on this!

Excellent work my friend!
Pleasure to read,
MrCaspian
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