for Illegal Love9/7/2019 c2 Engineer1869
Great to see this getting updated
Neo was absolutely hilarious from her ranking system to asking Ruby if she could make a move on Jaune.
I look forward to the next chapter.
Great to see this getting updated
Neo was absolutely hilarious from her ranking system to asking Ruby if she could make a move on Jaune.
I look forward to the next chapter.
9/2/2019 c2 Zifryt
Nice story, i like your characterization for Jaune and Ruby.
You should put some characteer tag so that people whio use them can find it.
Nice story, i like your characterization for Jaune and Ruby.
You should put some characteer tag so that people whio use them can find it.
9/1/2019 c2 Guest
Ooh, I look forward to more!
Ooh, I look forward to more!
9/1/2019 c2 nhehvnukl
"Dirt is infinetly more likable"- Man, aint that the truth. I really like your portrayal of Roman, Neo, Cinder- Basically, all of the cast. Jaune and Ruby are really fun too. This also came at a really good time for me- I was literally looking for Lancaster (background Roman and Neo for some reason lol) so I cant be happier. Looking forward for more!
"Dirt is infinetly more likable"- Man, aint that the truth. I really like your portrayal of Roman, Neo, Cinder- Basically, all of the cast. Jaune and Ruby are really fun too. This also came at a really good time for me- I was literally looking for Lancaster (background Roman and Neo for some reason lol) so I cant be happier. Looking forward for more!
6/21/2019 c2 Calamk
Yes, the story is gonna continue. I've actually been waiting for this since I followed. Good to hear you can update soon and I will look forward to the next chapter.
Yes, the story is gonna continue. I've actually been waiting for this since I followed. Good to hear you can update soon and I will look forward to the next chapter.
3/3/2019 c1 
2Dumbass0
Just found this fic and I gotta say that its really interesting. A lot of things work really well in this initial chapter and some things I feel could've been different or more improved.
I'll start with my criticisms: Jaune simply doesn't seem nearly as capable as Ruby. There isn't a lot shown that shows how their supposed to be equal partners. I understand if Ruby is better at combat, that's fine, but Jaune has to have his own strengths that separate him from Ruby. Next, these guys have through five breakups as friends, granted more than half of them probably were really serious considering they were friends for 10 years, but they shouldn't be that awkward around each other because they should understand each others emotions. Also the part about Ruby's self doubt, hope its not the first time she's had that because that simply just doesn't make much sense.
Now for the good shit: The characters feel great so far and are likeable with their own quirks and flaws that will hopefully get more and more developed. The direction seems to be good and the potential to where the story goes is huge. They could be confronted by specters of their past when fighting off idiotic Beacon students for Roman, or finding out Cinder's endgame and each of them having a dilemma over running away or stopping the destruction of Vale. Or simply just a daily look into how their relationship progresses as they commit countless crimes ranging from dangerous to ridiculous
Well, that's all I got. I know its been a while since you've updated this story, but it would be great to see more. I'm loving it and I bet others do too. I do recommend putting character tags in the description, so that more people would view this story. :)
2Dumbass0Just found this fic and I gotta say that its really interesting. A lot of things work really well in this initial chapter and some things I feel could've been different or more improved.
I'll start with my criticisms: Jaune simply doesn't seem nearly as capable as Ruby. There isn't a lot shown that shows how their supposed to be equal partners. I understand if Ruby is better at combat, that's fine, but Jaune has to have his own strengths that separate him from Ruby. Next, these guys have through five breakups as friends, granted more than half of them probably were really serious considering they were friends for 10 years, but they shouldn't be that awkward around each other because they should understand each others emotions. Also the part about Ruby's self doubt, hope its not the first time she's had that because that simply just doesn't make much sense.
Now for the good shit: The characters feel great so far and are likeable with their own quirks and flaws that will hopefully get more and more developed. The direction seems to be good and the potential to where the story goes is huge. They could be confronted by specters of their past when fighting off idiotic Beacon students for Roman, or finding out Cinder's endgame and each of them having a dilemma over running away or stopping the destruction of Vale. Or simply just a daily look into how their relationship progresses as they commit countless crimes ranging from dangerous to ridiculous
Well, that's all I got. I know its been a while since you've updated this story, but it would be great to see more. I'm loving it and I bet others do too. I do recommend putting character tags in the description, so that more people would view this story. :)
3/1/2019 c1 Idk
Update!
Update!
7/10/2018 c1 Guest
I'm not sure I like this, you seem to be making Ruby more competent then Jaune, I mean you shown she's strong, she fought Cinder, is not to be messed with and she reads, the only real thing you've shown of Jaune is that he forgot the money in the bank and that he doesn't read, I mean does he even have a semblance, and let me guess Ruby's reading is just so she can connect with Blake later on, because that's really the only reason anyone ever reads in these fics is to connect with Blake.
Also why does Jaune have Crocea mors, it just doesn't seem to fit with him in this, I mean he is a criminal after all and last time I checked Crocea mors was a hero's sword, so yeah doesn't suit him.
I'm not sure I like this, you seem to be making Ruby more competent then Jaune, I mean you shown she's strong, she fought Cinder, is not to be messed with and she reads, the only real thing you've shown of Jaune is that he forgot the money in the bank and that he doesn't read, I mean does he even have a semblance, and let me guess Ruby's reading is just so she can connect with Blake later on, because that's really the only reason anyone ever reads in these fics is to connect with Blake.
Also why does Jaune have Crocea mors, it just doesn't seem to fit with him in this, I mean he is a criminal after all and last time I checked Crocea mors was a hero's sword, so yeah doesn't suit him.