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1/5 c3 JustDusty
I don't think you've given them enough advantages. I mean, intel all known and unknown skills of anll masters, ability to block structural analysis, Natural healing faster than Avalon on Arturia, and don't forget overpowering the supposedly extremely famous heroic child (in all of Japan but apparently not Fuyuki) to the point where he hits like a damn berserker and is as fast as an assassin, while being a dual wielding saber at the same time. I don't think that's enough to make him break a sweat in a 6vs1 matchup.
1/5 c1 JustDusty
I don't normally comment on power-scaling in fanfiction, but i really don't like it when the Author is well aware of the differences in power and nerfs/boosts the original stats. I would normally let that go and keep reading if it wasn't on purpose.
12/14/2020 c10 ManticoreBlues
love the fanfiction. hope you continue soon, also I was wondering if your plan on writing a second part or continuing this to a point in which Shirou and maybe Rin(although I honestly personally don't care much about Rin) help Kirito and crew save Asuna?
12/9/2020 c10 Yoriko Shinjiru
Love your story 3
12/1/2020 c10 Guest
These stories you have made are very good I hope you can come back to it soon.
10/3/2020 c7 mathdump
so the problems with changing first perspectives is that it can get confusing who talks. Instead of leaving it to the reader to figure it out based on context, I would announce the character of interest in each perspective change. personally, i would honestly prefer changing to 3rd person altogether
9/18/2020 c5 Guest
Argo calls herself onee-san in regards to kirito and asuna (who is a year older than kirito), so its generally assumed argo is older than kirito at least.
9/12/2020 c10 xfel
Hell yeah, this is great!

The biggest problem I tend to have with F/SN grail war fics is that often enough, the lineup of masters has too many connections to truly fight each other. This was not the case here, we have a decent roster of Masters and Servants who each have motivations, and reason to fight each other, and only few cases of holding back. And when that does happen, it stems naturally from the characters, such as Archer's reluctance to kill children.
Even the interactions between the protagonist factions, which are to be expected to turn more friendly in time, are well built up in a way that leads to enough conflict without it seeming forced.

The balance of power works out. Kirito tends to be OP, but here he's on a playing field with others who are similarily powerful. His bag of tricks is deep, but we were warned about it, and it doesn't ex-machina him every time. Of course, older Shirou Emiya being around also helps to alleviate any accusations of OP-ness.

I also really like how you drew out the full realization of Shirou's capabilities. Kirito already knew they underestimated him, but that last action is going to open up a whole new level of WTF.

If there is one thing to criticise, it's how the enemy servants seem to line up for their fights. Whenever one is about to be defeated, another one shows up to position themself as the next threat. It simply seems a bit too neat for me that there were apparently no battles that we didn't see.
4/24/2020 c10 5Robin the Ylissian Grandmaster
Wow that was an awesome read. I can't wait to see Rider vs everyone else!
2/7/2020 c10 Iiznelomviing
I was wondering where this story was! Please keep continuing your work!
2/7/2020 c10 victor janus
Fuck you Rider. You can steel all the fame in the world, but of all the people with the title of king of kings you deserve to call yourself that least.
Sorry about that. As for the story I've really enjoyed it. It's for the best that Assassin bought it though. Honestly I thought it was assassin that was going to attack them, so that was a surprise.
I also thought that Rin was being silly preparing healing against a sure kill. She knows Shirou better then me I guess.
2/5/2020 c7 victor janus
hmm unless they can hack a secure database I think you have a plothole since there are multiple minor plot points that rely on Kirito not being known to the public. Rumors about a black swordsman make sense, but the government cracked down to keep the identities of SAO safe.
2/5/2020 c6 victor janus
Ah dungeon diving. RPG hell. Must feel like home to our SAO cast.
Huh Sakura wasn't even mad. Awfully nice of her. so she died from mana exhaustion like her uncle?
2/5/2020 c5 victor janus
Ah Sakura why'd you have to do that.
Still this is good news. She's merely gone full Makiri instead of going full dark Sakura. Compared to skipping all the steps this is only a mild hell no so far.
Unlimited blade works is truly Sakura's worst timeline.
2/5/2020 c4 victor janus
This might just be Shirou not knowing better but Atlanta is a bear girl not a cat girl. They look similar, but are different.
I found Kirito using his super human reflexes to keep Argo from head desking into her food hilarious.
Oh right I forgot about Argo's counter measures. I thought he couldn't understand them because they were digital.
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