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for Celestial Worm (Worm AU crossover)

5/18 c15 Gon Freaks
Wow, yeah, I can't read this anymore. Sorry, since I normally like your stories. This one I do not. No father would say house rules, no tracking asshat that just kidnapped his daughter with cops help.
5/18 c14 Gon Freaks
Ok... I think your Taylor is and idiot, they kidnap me and I am ok with it. I walk away and it's ok. Utterly stupid character.
5/11 c6 Kraizy
That was incredibly anticlimactic for a torture scene. Tug rope, feel pain, done.
3/12 c31 16zigmas
That's the funniest AdmiScion couple, like, EVER.
Not that there've been many in the first place.
It's either "kill him", "banish him", "coopt him", "EAT him", or something similar.
Even literally "ignore him" or "throw-out-of-story him" in some cases.
"DATE him" is still rather unique, lol.
And this is also non-SI, even though the level of AU is rather disconcerting all on its own (for me).
So, good job, but this isn't as good as Hope or Security, and that's so mainly due to the overwhelmingly unnecessary AU that basically made Worm itself become just a side-story for Mystal, to a degree.
And due to the utter lack of jaw-dropping info-stunned Kaisers and Lungs, if anything - heck, I'm not even sure you've MENTIONED either of them in this story, even in passing, huh?
Cause, ya know, THAT is what I like the most in Worm fiction, hehehe.
3/11 c10 zigmas
This got way too weird way too fast.
Slightly predictable (crossovers usually tend to be that way), but still somewhat disappointing.
As in, I was very much looking forward to seeing Janesha actually being the only AU element of the story, not making the actual Worm story be a side plot to the AU story somehow.
2/23 c31 1chain.reader
Good story!
1/13 c6 BlackStarMage
am I the only one who doesn't like Danny's character in this?
11/16/2020 c31 1tpx1
nice story
thank you for sharing!
10/30/2020 c31 shugokage
Great job on this interesting and impressive story!
10/21/2020 c11 Guest
Wait... 'prevent mortals from even seriously considering it'. But Taylor just seriously considered it with just that very question. With that and hints earlier, it seems like Taylor might actually be a bit More than Mortal.
10/22/2020 c31 4kdakmmt
Better ending but my opinion of Danny hasn't changed even though it worked out in the end.
10/20/2020 c31 10feauxen
Well, this ending does feel a lot more realistic than the first one. I didn't realize it until I saw this one, but there were some unresolved issues, weren't there?
10/20/2020 c31 5Warhawk Talon
I like the rewrite of the ending, seeing the moment when Taylor was shown that she had been Mastered was definitely something that I felt was missing from the other version. The original ending had actually reminded me of your other fic Trump Card where everything was wrapped up really fast at the end, with not much explanation.

Glad you took the time to improve this, it was a great story. BTW, I’m very much looking forward to the next chapter of Wyvern.
10/18/2020 c29 LordGrimstorm
I really loved this one. Just from reading the synopsis alone, that convinced me to purchase both of the novels in the Celestial Wars Saga, which I started last night and am also thoroughly enjoying so far. I will say that I preferred Jenesha a bit more before she started making all those divinely inspired changes. Some of the things, necessary, sure. But others tread all over important things that many people would not agree with. Namely canning the Constitution based on believing that it no longer applies because of when it was written. Sorry, but that ain't the case. Also, the mere existence of guns doesn't lead to a higher crime rate. There's plenty of murders in countries where guns are more restricted, they just use knives and other tools more often. The fact is, people suck and will kill if they feel they need to regardless of what tool is available. Also, stubborn mortals want to choose what to do with their lives, even if it isn't really in their best interests. Also, some people work hard their entire lives to make something of themselves, so it's not really fair to implement a "steal from the rich to give to the poor" system, because it's wrong to punish people for success. Why focus on bringing down anyone to raise up others, when you could instead just raise others up to their level? So yeah, Danny was in the right for calling Chance to fix matters before they got worse, and it's good how things turned out, but at the same time, I kind of don't like how Taylor also was tricked into believing the wrong thing about Jenesha. She had all the facts about her being a Celest way beforehand so she should have been able to logic her way through the "no, she's just a superhero" bit, she was within the 5 meter distance thing (not that that mattered as much due to the tether) AND she wore the anti-mindfuck ring, so I don't know how the powerbase/thrall on top of that wouldn't have protected her from that thought. Yes, Chance had the thrall from Danny, but either the ring works or it doesn't. It should've been able to do its job. Even if I can set that aside, my personal issue is that she knew the truth and then they lied to her. That was rightfully gained knowledge, and it was hers to keep. Feels pretty shitty to lie to her after she'donce been in the proper loop, even if it turned out well in the end. It's like Dr. Manhattan killing Rorshach for wanting to do the right thing and let everyone know the truth. Sure, they might've had good reasons for not wanting people to know, but it was a wrongfully attained peace, and the people had a right to know, so that makes them in the wrong for going through with that. I'll stop rambling now. Great story, thanks for getting me on to what seems to be a great new franchise as well, that I'll definitely be letting my friends know about. The Celestial Wars Saga seems right up their alley.
10/14/2020 c29 Sebine
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