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10/1/2018 c3 2Charles Ceaser
Awesome chapter. Please update soon.
9/25/2018 c2 Charles Ceaser
Awesome chapter. Please update soon.
9/23/2018 c1 Guest
General idea has a lot of promise. Huge suggestion: run spell check on miscrosoft word or get a beta familiar with sentence structure and grammar rules of English to do it for you.
9/22/2018 c2 Doctor Doofenshmirtz
Nice idea, nice plot, but the general writing style and grammar are plain terrible. It is barely readable in some cases.
9/22/2018 c2 qunbulah
keep going
9/16/2018 c1 6rosyhatake
I dont think your writting is shitty, and I love the idea. I would suggest changing 'I said' to different terms. I stated , I hissed, I scowled, I say menacing, I muttered. A bit of variety can impact the way things sound for course lord hokage. Danzo sneered slighty narrowing his eyes as I informed him of my conditions. Other than that small issue I love the story. I will read (more like play the audio in my car while I'm on my way to workand try and leave reviews.
9/12/2018 c1 toadfist
Good idea shit writing
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