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for Three Brothers: Remix

1/27/2021 c2 Guest
This story is great I love it so excited to see where you go with this and what the brothers will do next
11/19/2020 c2 kuraiyukikitsune
Love it, wondering if there’s more?
7/9/2020 c2 Idon'tgiveashit08
Is this story abounded?
5/8/2020 c1 Winter VizionZ
I hope you update this soon I look forward to seeing all the chaos that the brothers will cause with all three being together and having logia fruits.
3/31/2020 c2 4Le055Li0n
Really liking the rewrite so far.
11/27/2019 c2 1TheMostCasualObserver
Interesting story. I always enjoy seeing Luffy with the darkness fruit and I doubly enjoy seeing it act more like a typical logia. Sabo’s fruit is also pretty interesting; I have to admit I hadn’t thought of a steam fruit for logia before. You’re right, it does fit.

The brutality against the Goa Kingdom was not expected, but hey, I’ve never minded a darker Luffy.

Will the straw hats be a part of the adventure? Hope so. As much as I love the three brothers together, having them interact with the crew would be even better.

Then you could have an actual monster trio on the crew.

I have to ask; do you have a beta? You need one, or at the very least need to proofread the chapter before you write it. There are several dozen moments throughout each chapter where the sentence gets cut off prematurely and the fused with the back end of the following thought. The end result is an experience that leaves the reader more mentally tired than relaxed and reluctant to follow the story.

Honestly, aside from some basic things that you’ll pick up as you write and critique your work, this is the only real problem in your story. Unfortunately, it’s a very big and noticeable one. Thankfully, it is also easy to fix.

If it turns out you don’t have a beta and you want one (highly recommended) then feel free to hit me up. This is definitely a story I wouldn’t mind helping with. If not, I still urge you to find someone to beta for you.
11/19/2019 c2 Mina168
This story is amazing. You should really consider making a squeal about what they do after they leave.
11/12/2019 c2 1OceansAlliteration
Battlesny. To answer your questions. Yes being a more standard Logia Luffy is weak to light. If the light around him is strong/bright enough he would have a difficult time making his darkness strong enough to manifest and fight with. The trick is that Luffy is a combat genius and not having rubber brains and having fewer morals would only make that more apparent. There are many ways to keep darkness away from the light long enough to strike. But I will leave that for a future know if kamojis show up but its an evil cat face in case they dont). As to being weak to fire or lightning, I would say it depends on how it is used. If Ace were to get his fire going bright enough Luffy would have a hard time hitting him with darkness. But even a tiny touch is enough to nullify DF abilities so it might come down to who is fastest. A lot of Luffys combat ability when at a disadvantage against a DF user would come down to speed and endurance. He draws more fire naturally and takes more damage when he isnt incorporeal, you may recall. But he is also a D. Which comes with its own set of rules and very few restrictions... in any case. To sum it up. Yeah Luffys environment and opponent, should either have bright light, would put him on the back foot. But Im pretty sure he can handle whatever the world can throw at him. Thanks for the comment! The new chapter is in early stages and I want to have it done by Christmas. Weather I will be able to finish in time remains to be seen.
11/11/2019 c2 Battlesny
if Luffy's Dark Dark fruit is an actual logia in this story does that mean that his power (and thus him) is weak to light, such as fire, or lightning... or the middle of an Alabastan desert at high noon

is morganeer a real word? or did you just invent it to say people who do what captain Morgan did?
10/17/2019 c1 OceansAlliteration
Guest (with the Sasuke iconI get where you’re coming from. My reasoning for writing that section how it did is: the Dark Fruit in this story functions like a more standard Logia. Thus as long as Luffy is focusing on maintaining an intangible state, he can allow matter to pass through him. Another intangible logia touching him would have their intangibility negated, yes, but Luffys intangibility is not. Tl;dr it wasn’t Sabo passing Luffys head through his arm. It was Luffy passing Sabos arm through his head.
10/15/2019 c1 Guest
When sabo hit luffy, it should have been solid. Luffy's df negated sabo's so his fist shouldn't have pass through him.
10/12/2019 c2 3SakuraKoi
10/12/2019 c2 Lazymanjones96
Interesting stuff looking forward to more
10/11/2019 c1 1OceansAlliteration
SLkurotama. Thanks for your kind words! Im very happy to finally update and keep working on this story. Its been hard getting through this chapter since there was so much...dark content. I usually do better when I’m writing fluffy or funny stuff than angst. Even editing and building on another authors work wears me out quickly. The next chapter is going to be shorter, but it will also be one I wrote entirely myself and I hope it will be entertaining!
10/11/2019 c2 OceansAlliteration
NHarem Forevasorry to hear its not working on your end! I posted from my phone pretty much as soon as I was done. Once I get home I’ll pull it up on my laptop and see whats up. Far as I can tell on mobile though its working right...T
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