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for Ambition of the Red Princess

9/24/2019 c12 VulpineSnow
Hm. Good chapter, overall. I don't have a lot to say. I love the references in the names, and in particular how Lautrec just unnerves everybody. XD Here's hoping he's more loyal and less a backstabber than his namesake, but we shall just see.

But now you have Naofumi sharing colors with Ren, don't you? I mean, Motoyasu is Red, Ren is Blue, Itsuki is Green. Why not a bright yellow? XD Too goofy for you?
9/24/2019 c12 40lord Martiya
Someone should get Las Noches a raise. And Malty to learn how to actually act as a cool older sister.

Something about the Shield being unable to attack: he could easily go Roman, the legions used their shields as weapons quite well.
9/24/2019 c6 Avalon2077
I'm really enjoying every bit of this chapters! I'm glad I found this story, I was looking for something like this after watching the anime. I share the same feeling for Malty, so for me it's amazing what a deep and thought character is here. Honestly, I feel genuinely lucky to have found somenone with this view of how he wants to change a story like tRotSH and his attittude towards it's writting. I appreciate how you expand on the other characters, it helps me comprehend more their actions in the anime.

So, thanks a lot! To you and your comrades!

Btw, the last bit of this page was so funny I forgot about everything else that happened before HAHA!
9/23/2019 c12 2Cario Regun
Nice chapter! looking forward for the next one!
9/23/2019 c12 Seth409
Keeping a good pace for the story, as I feel it flows at a natural pace. It'll be interesting to see how fast Raphtalia grows in this one considering EXP distribution and all. Though I really like the bond she's forming with the orange blobs of terror, it's rather adorable.

I think Malty should be cautious about throwing copious amounts of fireballs though, it's one thing for her to "trigger" a skill when her life is in danger, it's another for her to be so proficient with the skill so soon after learning it, it might make Naofumi a bit more on the suspicious side. Then again, Malty isn't well known for her forethought so...

But I'm really enjoying this a lot so far as I'm a fan of obscure/off the wall pairings. But, I also appreciate how you're developing a relationship than having them drool over each other from day 1. But, enough of my ramblings. Keep up the good work!
9/23/2019 c12 2alanvaladez
Those 3 orange balls are now my favorite characters here xD
9/23/2019 c12 blackicethunder
I always thought the simplest way for the shield hero to be able to fight other humans and non boss wave monsters would be to choke them out.
9/23/2019 c12 3OechsnerC
Nice update.
9/23/2019 c12 1fractalman
HAH! Even Malty knows not to mess with a chef in their kitchen!
9/22/2019 c12 Forest1395101
I think you did kind of give to much of an excuse to Melromark for their rampant racism. A good way to counter that would be to have the Melormarc people respond back worse, or even make it so that Melromarc started the war and performed equally horrible war crimes.
9/22/2019 c12 HarleyDotM
Oddly enough, I just started this story tonight, right before you updated. I'm enjoying it so far and the bonus chapter 12 being uploaded while I read earlier chapters was nice.

One thing I noticed in the update tonight was some grammatical errors that aren't present at all in earlier entries. Do you post updates and correct the errors between full chapter releases? Just curious, they aren't a big deal. I just thought it was odd to see on the latest addition.

Reading the earlier chapters it sometimes seemed like Mien (Mein?) was recapping a large bulk of the events that occurred in the chapter which was a little tedious. It felt like reading the same thing two or three times. The first, as the event occured, then the recap from her thoughts. And especially in the first few chapters, you have the same events from Naofumi's perspective too. This trend drops off in the latest chapters, however.

I hope I'm not stepping on your toes with this input, and I'm not an expert on writing or anything, just sharing my honest thoughts on the story. And the good far outweighs the bad.

Specific things I appreciate; Malty being grounded in reality with her frequent mistakes and slip ups. You make a lot of moments that show the shield hero is more layered than he's demonstrated so far, like his seemingly building suspicion of those around him (though nothing has been delivered on this front just yet, regarding Malty specifically). The pop culture references are a joy to read, if a bit on the nose.

If you have the chance to PM and reply to some of my thoughts on your story, I'd love to talk about it. Thanks for writing, I look forward to more.
9/22/2019 c12 7The Sinful
Should we assume the omake is canon? Cuz if so, more additions to the tvtropes page.

Something that doesn't help racism is individuals who fulfill most, or even all, negative stereotypes about their given group. I worked with a black guy who fulfilled stereotypes I thought weren't real and were just made up by people who hated blacks. On the flip side, I've worked with a black guy who didn't fulfill any stereotypes beyond wearing a du-rag rather than a hairnet while at work (my only complaint about him is he took longer than most to remember my hearing's fucky and he needs to speak louder).

Odd thought but do clothes fit the same on young demihumans if they're wearing them when they level up and mature? Cuz I don't recall Naofumi buying Raphtalia new clothes as she aged and I feel if he did offscreen, it would've clued him in faster that she'd aged roughly a decade in a week or two. Though I'm not sure how he missed it to begin with. That's like in Yu-Gi-Oh when everyone comments on the difference between Atem and Yugi being personality, ignoring the foot and a half difference in height and several octaves difference in voice. To quote YGO Abridged, "Holy shit, did your balls just drop?"

If I'm reading the party right, seems like they're fairly balanced. Two glass cannons (one ranged and one melee), a lightning bruiser, a fragile speedster, and a stone wall.
9/22/2019 c12 2KiroZen
Awesome incorporation of lore into the story. I wish I was capable of even half of that ability.

It figures that Elhard the Smith (Demon) was an adventurer. You don’t get scars like that from simply prancing around a smithy for your entire life.

Really wish canon gave us more Elhard.

And now, B-Rank Cooking Skill demonstration, with Naofumi Iwatani.

EX-Rank is reserved for Shirou Emiya and no one else.
9/22/2019 c12 5Pyromania101
I like how the blacksmith keeps trying to drill the "boring but practical" trope into Malty's head. As for the rest of the chapter, it's good too. Regarding green, though, isn't Naofumi's shade darker? Meh, oh well.
9/10/2019 c11 Night
Can't wait to see how it goes
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