for Life's Illusion4/22/2021 c3 StoneTheLoner
I wish you could keep the emotion thing straight. Does he not grieve like other people or does he not have emotions? Because those are two very different things. One would have him staring at the blade emotionlessly like you've written, and the other would have him showing excitement at getting the sword he wanted. He wouldn't care that its his dad's final gift, he'd just be happy he got the cool sword.
Instead of going all edgy and saying "He stared emotionlessly" at every opportunity, actually stop and think about what it does to the story and where that kind of thing belongs. Is it at the human level of not connecting to anyone like the average person does? Or is it everything, and he's precluded even from longing for strong magic? Because if so you need to go back and edit the previous chapters.
A final critique would be its not a good idea to instantly contradict descriptions of the character. He grinned an inhumanly wide smile but it was also a shallow smile? What the actual fck does that even mean lol?! I guess I could negate the two and just assume he smiled a normal looking smile because it can't be big and small at the same time. And if he's a human then no, he didn't smile an "Inhumanly wide" smile. He smiled a human smile.
I wish you could keep the emotion thing straight. Does he not grieve like other people or does he not have emotions? Because those are two very different things. One would have him staring at the blade emotionlessly like you've written, and the other would have him showing excitement at getting the sword he wanted. He wouldn't care that its his dad's final gift, he'd just be happy he got the cool sword.
Instead of going all edgy and saying "He stared emotionlessly" at every opportunity, actually stop and think about what it does to the story and where that kind of thing belongs. Is it at the human level of not connecting to anyone like the average person does? Or is it everything, and he's precluded even from longing for strong magic? Because if so you need to go back and edit the previous chapters.
A final critique would be its not a good idea to instantly contradict descriptions of the character. He grinned an inhumanly wide smile but it was also a shallow smile? What the actual fck does that even mean lol?! I guess I could negate the two and just assume he smiled a normal looking smile because it can't be big and small at the same time. And if he's a human then no, he didn't smile an "Inhumanly wide" smile. He smiled a human smile.
4/17/2021 c58 Poharan
I love the worldbuild do you make to your story, some people underestimate the important of that and FT really need a lot.
If you are try to expand the powers of the members of FT, remember there are a 72 demons on Ars Goetia if you want give more demons to Mira, or the the divine comedy also have the malebranche.
I love the worldbuild do you make to your story, some people underestimate the important of that and FT really need a lot.
If you are try to expand the powers of the members of FT, remember there are a 72 demons on Ars Goetia if you want give more demons to Mira, or the the divine comedy also have the malebranche.
4/15/2021 c1 gabpaulo2001
MC was supposed to be much stronger. Don't understand the notion for nerfing him like he almost died the first time from the blade maniac and promised to train hard, he almost died for a second time and pomised to work hard again and then the third time came and the reason is he didn't really put much work into training from the first two threat and promise that it won't happen again. He story is already interesting enough because of a choice of power to use, followed by those self added things but nerfing the MC is really bad in my opinion or maybe the author just want the mc to become a support? Shame though if that will be the case in the long run.
MC was supposed to be much stronger. Don't understand the notion for nerfing him like he almost died the first time from the blade maniac and promised to train hard, he almost died for a second time and pomised to work hard again and then the third time came and the reason is he didn't really put much work into training from the first two threat and promise that it won't happen again. He story is already interesting enough because of a choice of power to use, followed by those self added things but nerfing the MC is really bad in my opinion or maybe the author just want the mc to become a support? Shame though if that will be the case in the long run.
4/14/2021 c23 
1sandro540
The greater Illusion is nice and all, but I am still disappointed by his fighting style. He barely uses Illusions for faints or for making his mirror illusions look more real. For example when Elza was cut, adding blood and warmth to the blood would have made it much more effective creating a bigger psychological effect, and as I understand it, he just straight up fought her with swordplay instead of using Illusions while fighting. For example making multiple arms, or making his real arm disappear and making an illusionary arm to confuse the opponent. The mirror clone as well could have been better.
Sure here he was doing a grand illusion, but I am guessing he fights that way elsewhere as well, and instead of making his clone look more real (the backing off and all that was good, but not enough) and using his clone to fight (I am imagining her getting feedback from the attack against the illusionary clone, even though she wouldn't be hitting anything)an illusionary fight (with swordplay and all that), while he attacks from the back and uses his Illusion magic to remove the sense of pain, he does none of these things.
He could also make the fight more difficult for his opponent by including illusions here and there. An incredibly loud nose by the ear, or illusionary cards would have given way to many openings to exploit. Just some ideas here, considering how collected and inquisitive he is supposed to be, that sure doesn't show in fights. Just my 5 cents, and while this FF is top quality on a lot levels, having better grammar would smooth the reading experience by a lot. Sorry for this a bit negative review, but he fights almost awfully (in some ways at least).
1sandro540The greater Illusion is nice and all, but I am still disappointed by his fighting style. He barely uses Illusions for faints or for making his mirror illusions look more real. For example when Elza was cut, adding blood and warmth to the blood would have made it much more effective creating a bigger psychological effect, and as I understand it, he just straight up fought her with swordplay instead of using Illusions while fighting. For example making multiple arms, or making his real arm disappear and making an illusionary arm to confuse the opponent. The mirror clone as well could have been better.
Sure here he was doing a grand illusion, but I am guessing he fights that way elsewhere as well, and instead of making his clone look more real (the backing off and all that was good, but not enough) and using his clone to fight (I am imagining her getting feedback from the attack against the illusionary clone, even though she wouldn't be hitting anything)an illusionary fight (with swordplay and all that), while he attacks from the back and uses his Illusion magic to remove the sense of pain, he does none of these things.
He could also make the fight more difficult for his opponent by including illusions here and there. An incredibly loud nose by the ear, or illusionary cards would have given way to many openings to exploit. Just some ideas here, considering how collected and inquisitive he is supposed to be, that sure doesn't show in fights. Just my 5 cents, and while this FF is top quality on a lot levels, having better grammar would smooth the reading experience by a lot. Sorry for this a bit negative review, but he fights almost awfully (in some ways at least).
4/12/2021 c59 EdgyBro
The ranking and class system explanations are very interesting. If I ever get to writing a Fairy Tail fanfic, I hope I can use your mage's measure ring system.
The ranking and class system explanations are very interesting. If I ever get to writing a Fairy Tail fanfic, I hope I can use your mage's measure ring system.
4/12/2021 c58 EdgyBro
Just reread the entire story. I'm so glad to see Bishop using Eleventh Hour to buff Natsu. I can't wait until Wendy joins the gang. Then Bishop can actually used Eleventh Hour more frequently on himself and his teammate with Wendy healing the negative aftereffect of that illusion.
Just reread the entire story. I'm so glad to see Bishop using Eleventh Hour to buff Natsu. I can't wait until Wendy joins the gang. Then Bishop can actually used Eleventh Hour more frequently on himself and his teammate with Wendy healing the negative aftereffect of that illusion.
3/30/2021 c11 Greenmatsui
there are more than the 5 senses mess with someone’s propioception and they will find it difficult to control their body or their sense of balance you can also induce nausea also fuck with someone’s sense of time think out of the box
there are more than the 5 senses mess with someone’s propioception and they will find it difficult to control their body or their sense of balance you can also induce nausea also fuck with someone’s sense of time think out of the box
3/30/2021 c59 dragonballaca
I read this in few days and I can only say this is excellent where the MC isn't overpowered and is relatively well balanced not being a training maniac and you explaining your interpretation of Fairy tail's lore is great.
Also honestly projection of weapons should be the next step for Bishop in making the Illusions real! Can't wait for Bishop vs Laxus fight ngl.
I read this in few days and I can only say this is excellent where the MC isn't overpowered and is relatively well balanced not being a training maniac and you explaining your interpretation of Fairy tail's lore is great.
Also honestly projection of weapons should be the next step for Bishop in making the Illusions real! Can't wait for Bishop vs Laxus fight ngl.
3/23/2021 c3 sgt. fluffles
This story was recommended by my therapist for me to read, cause I have the same issue as the MC. I have trouble with feeling emotions, so they thought that it might help. I just wanted to let you know, thanks. I hope it will help. Prob won't but hopefully
This story was recommended by my therapist for me to read, cause I have the same issue as the MC. I have trouble with feeling emotions, so they thought that it might help. I just wanted to let you know, thanks. I hope it will help. Prob won't but hopefully
3/22/2021 c59 Poharan
Glad to see you again; important detail who people something dont realize, write training season only when Bishop is learning something new or has another focus than usual, for save effort in another training season is better say that Bish realice his training, i read some stories who 1/3 is a about training.
Good episode as always.
PS1: Dont have problems to break the canon.
PS2: Just let Bish hits Mira and all happy.
Aye!
Glad to see you again; important detail who people something dont realize, write training season only when Bishop is learning something new or has another focus than usual, for save effort in another training season is better say that Bish realice his training, i read some stories who 1/3 is a about training.
Good episode as always.
PS1: Dont have problems to break the canon.
PS2: Just let Bish hits Mira and all happy.
Aye!
3/21/2021 c59 maximilianoismiranda
Muy buen cap
Ahora que lo pienso el prota no seria un tipo de sousuke aizen en potencia? :v
Muy buen cap
Ahora que lo pienso el prota no seria un tipo de sousuke aizen en potencia? :v