FanFiction.Net
Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for Shattered Memories

9/14/2021 c4 danielkid50
This is epic. I love it. Although, I personally liked the Broken Glass fic more due to it being about Hachiman.
1/22/2021 c4 ObscureAbsurdity
A very interesting sequel, I hope to see you come back to it sometime.
1/14/2021 c4 Random Reader Guy
I just read Broken Glass and this story; absolutely thrilling and tense, raw beyond measure for a high school murder mystery and you've got a great skill in conveying immense character through first person perspective.
1/1/2021 c4 Lance Harris
I would like to see the reaction of Hiratsuka if she ever were to know that Hachiman's dead. And that Komachi is going through the same path that led him to destroy the Service Club (and then to his death). She would never let Komachi hear the end of it.
12/28/2019 c3 3The Richmaster
You did a great job with the how raw the emotions felt this chapter
12/28/2019 c2 The Richmaster
You did a great job of capturing Hachiman's tone in the letter
12/28/2019 c2 Guest
Sorry the above was meant for the prequel; I had both open in seperate tabs
12/28/2019 c1 Guest
Okay, so I had some time to think about this story and something else came to mind; this feels like a good examination of the madness inherent in the members of the service club that feels like it could realistically appear if the're pushed too far
12/28/2019 c1 The Richmaster
Okay, this was really powerful; I loved the subtext and emotions that ould be felt simmering beneath the surface
12/21/2019 c4 CMY187
(Part 2 of my review of Chapter 4)

“two more things that just f-king slipped out”
Komachi is a dangerous person.
“I don’t want this”
No you don’t. But you’re going after it anyway, because like Hachiman, if you do not you’d go mad.
“grabs her fair in frustration”
Ha!
“that was the truest antithesis”
In the years that have passed since Broken Glass, Taishi may have deduced what might have happened that caused the destruction of the Service Club…
“He only looks at her, stunned”
I grinned toothily at this.
“you’ve helped me. You really have…I don’t understan-”
I’m guessing that after she left, Taishi stood in place for a moment, staring at the spot where she had left and turning Komachi’s words over in his head, then muttering, ‘...s-t.’
“She tilts her head back and breathes in”
‘He was history’s servant now. And when he was swallowed by the rising sun he was not reborn but BORN, new life walking east to America, hands full of history that was wrought of wood and iron.’ – Issue 3 of the 303 comic mini-series by Garth Ennis.
“you’re wrong if you think that they can’t be the same thing”
You’re a great writer, GOF. Take your time with writing the rest of this story, please. Quality should not be rushed.
“If I don’t get the answer I want, then I’ll have to live with that”
For better or for worse, Komachi has committed to her course now. She will learn the truth no matter the consequences, and she won’t allow anything to get in her way.
12/21/2019 c4 3Shaeman
Trust me, this will end up being Haruno as the killer. Chapter 2 put out a big hint toward that letter and how it get conceived by her. Big cryptic message
12/21/2019 c1 Shaeman
If this gonna twist where I though It would, Haruno might be the strongest suspect here because of the letter. Feels like one big cryptic to put up a game from him with his message.
12/20/2019 c4 1CMY187
“knowing with a petulant guilt that she already regrets it”
I love the writing of the nature of the friendship between Komachi and Taishi in this chapter. Komachi does care for the Kawasaki family (Saki in Oregairu has Komachi’s vote and support in possibly becoming Hachiman’s girlfriend), but like Hachiman she is not without her problems and flaws. And Taishi genuinely cares for Komachi, which means he’d say what he feels she needs to hear rather than what she wants to hear, even if it strains their friendship.
“her heart and her head are screaming at”
Hachiman knew that Komachi would never be able to let his death go, at least not entirely; if she chooses not to investigate it, it would haunt her for the rest of her life no matter where she goes or what she does. He encourages her in the letter, telling her that unlike him, she could achieve a better result than he did; that she can get both the truth AND happiness.
“seemed too fluid”
I love that Komachi is suffering from internal conflict and struggle in this story. I’m getting Max Payne-vibes.
“Haruno hurt her so easily, without even lifting a finger”
Imagine that person being your older sister…
“The wounds that have failed to become scars are gaping open”
Hachiman was nearly driven mad in Broken Glass, until Komachi inadvertently helped him solve the case.
“she rings it again patiently”
The Kawasaki siblings are coping and living, but they are still hurt and damaged from what happened after Yumiko’s birthday.
“a familiar refrain, a discordant recognition within her”
Stranger in a Familiar Land.
“lost their father here”

“lost a part of himself here”
Hachiman knew from the start how it would end when he decided to get to the truth of Hayato’s death…no matter what.
“take it back to Shuya’s apartment”
Whatever she lost when Hachiman died, being with Shuya cannot help to heal it. Shuya is unable to truly help her when she needs it most. And he knows and hates it.
“allowed her to forget”
I love this. This has got to be one of the most difficult-to-write Oregairu stories I have ever read.
“just as deeply as they loved their children”
The Hikigaya parents were not happy people, constantly forced to spend insanely long hours and days at the corporate grindstone.
“That grief swelled and combusted in the air”
Hayato died in Yumiko’s home, at her birthday party no less. I suspect that Hachiman never told Yumiko who it was who killed Hayato. She probably wouldn’t have believed him anyway; she wants it to be Yukino and wants someone, anyone, to agree with her.
“graduated and moved onto university”
…so Hachiman was at Sobu High for at least one year after destroying the Service Club. Jesus Christ…this means he likely spent another year in the same class as Yui, whom he by then had deduced is the one who killed Hayato.
“At the arrival of this self-sufficiency”
Mrs Hikigaya could not cope with her grief and pain sufficiently to be a pillar of support for her now father-less children. The Hikigaya family was already broken, and only remained together for a time out of financial constraints.
“Komachi still visited her mother often”
I wonder what Hachiman felt toward his father’s death.
“the lines of resentment on his face”
He probably resents her more for Komachi than for himself.
“unfairly doubted”
While it can be argued that being corporate slaves is the main reason for them being all-but-absent from their children’s lives, it puts a huge dent in that argument when you consider that when they do have free time, the parents shower Komachi with attention and affection while giving Hachiman the bare minimum.
Also, a common practice for narcissistic parents is to make one child the ‘golden child’ and the other the ‘black sheep’. (looks at the Yukinoshita and Hikigaya families) …goddammit.
Also, I have to say I don’t like Molly Weasley AT ALL, and I consider the writing of her character to be one of Rowling’s short-comings as a writer; Molly is not only hypocritical but also limits her amount and level of parental affection to whichever of her children is the most ‘successful’. Hm…a story of Hachiman in Hogwarts during the time of the previous generation would be fascinating to follow (I don’t like James Potter or Lily Evans either. And the Marauders were bullies in their youth who never once suffered any consequence for their actions (I don’t count what happened to the Potters at Godric’s Hollow). Yeah, I have a lot of problems with Rowling’s series. I absolutely despise Protagonist Centered Morality, and the HP series is heavily afflicted with it; anybody whom Harry likes or cares about cannot possibly be all that bad, according to Rowling)
“found no way to reassure him, prove to him that the truth he was perceiving was wrong”
Because deep down, a part of her agrees with him.
“she thought bitterly”
How could she tell him that his cynical, misanthropic worldview is wrong when her own is not very dissimilar to it?
“The responsibility for that…would fall on her”
…she really is just like her brother.
“her subconscious anticipated the sense of responsibility”
Hachiman never even liked or cared for Hayama Hayato. Broken Glass is so awesome.
“trying in vain to keep the fractious parts of their family united”
Doing this may only have spurred Hachiman’s decision to leave. Komachi wanted the Hikigayas to try to be a family again…but it’s not like said family didn’t already have problems even before Hayato and Mr Hikigaya’s death.
“somehow, I know this is my fault”
…can Komachi do it? Can she gain both the truth and happiness? Hachiman believed she can. I can only hope that she could do it.
“in the absence of another”
Taishi cares for Komachi and would do what he can for her, but at the same time, he is not stupid; he knows that he would never be the most important person in Komachi’s life.
“its apparent inability to age”
Now I’m more curious about the Kawasaki parents.
“the easy evenings and schooldays”
There is more to Taishi than meets the eye. I suspect that he may be just as interesting as his older sister.
“that she desperately needs right now”
Taishi dislikes Shuya, and Hachiman outright loathed him(Shuya). Komachi is not an idiot; she knew this, yet chose to romance Shuya anyway.
“weakening her knees”
She has probably never been more vulnerable in her life. Her mother’s not going to be any help due to being too busy with her own grief and pain, Shuya for obvious reasons isn’t going to be much help either…huh. That’s pretty much it.
I wonder if Komachi knows and is able to contact Zaimokuza or Iroha in this story.
“withdrawing from the contact”
Hmm.
“his friend, perhaps the closest he has”
I wonder what Komachi and Kawasaki think of each other. Kawasaki is/was in love with Hachiman, and she is a pretty sharp person; she may have spotted and noted the similarities between the Hikigaya siblings despite (or perhaps because of) their differences being more obvious.
“Komachi can’t expel the thought”
True Detective, Komachi. True Detective.
Lately, I’ve been wondering and picturing what it would be like to read an Oregairu story in which Hachiman owns and runs his own private investigation firm with Komachi working there part-time while pursuing her own studies in university. In that hypothetical story, I thought of Hachiman being hired/receiving requests for help from people like Kawasaki, Zaimokuza, Iroha and Hayato.
“the presence of new photographs”
Kawasaki knows who killed Hayato, and in all likelihood Yui got away with it scot-free. Then again, Yui did lose something precious to her; the Service Club was dissolved thanks to Hachiman. Yukino probably knew the moment she spoke to Hachiman and he lied to her about the torn page what was going to happen.
“only another place where she could never belong”
She could not dissuade Hachiman from his chosen path. When she told him that it is sometimes better to just let things lie…something snapped in him, and he closed himself off from her, albeit temporarily.
“The truth rebounds off the beige wallpaper like the echoes of long-ago emitted screams”
I remember the final scene of Broken Glass; Yukino being a first-hand witness to Hachiman in what may had been the latter’s – for lack of a better word – ‘happiest’ moment; him finally solving the case. There, in the Service Club clubroom, Hachiman carried out the mantra of the club in the best and worst way possible, and in the process he destroyed the club.
“Taishi had been in a relationship”
I wonder what his ex-girlfriend thinks of Saki.
“with the greedy want of someone intent on recapturing their youth…dismal failure at a lasting romance”
I’m guessing that Saki didn’t like that woman.
“seemingly forgotten and thankfully so”
Hachiman harbors no feelings of resentment or bitterness toward Orimoto. He harbors no feelings for her at all, having learnt in the years since that there are many, many other Orimoto Kaoris.
“That kind of relationship, between siblings, can never be replaced”
GenericOregairuFan, if you haven’t watched Altered Carbon, I absolutely, highly recommend that series. Takeshi Kovacs is just WAY too similar to Hikigaya Hachiman, and yes, there is a reason that I am recommending Altered Carbon at this point after reading the above quoted line.
“Why has he remembered it so perfectly?”
This made me smile. Taishi likely hasn’t forgotten what the Service Club – and Hachiman – had done for him and his sister.
…and then Hachiman hurt Saki in Broken Glass, later telling Ebina that Saki needs a good friend, more than ever.
“been sitting still for months, while the rest of the world raced on around her”
For Hachiman, it was two weeks. Komachi may never have taken the initiative, may never have moved to investigate her brother’s death, if not for the letter that he had sent to her by way of Yukinoshita Haruno of all people.
“share in that hopelessness”
I thought of Kovacs and Ortega in Altered Carbon.
“her brother probably read it once”
Komachi knows so much about Hachiman that she can instinctively remember something about him everywhere she goes.
“only when Shuya or Hachiman aren’t there”
(sigh) Yeah, that is how it is. And while I don’t know what Taishi thinks of Hachiman at this point, it is clear that he does not like Shuya.
“She’s just upstairs…he cuts over her reassuringly”
Every time Saki sees Komachi, she would be reminded of Hachiman. Which may be good or bad, or both.
“still holding down the receptionist job”
Which means she’s had trouble with employment in the past. I love that Saki is skilled in Karate. Lord help anybody who tries to harass her.
“working regular hours”
Did Saki drown herself in long-hour jobs after Broken Glass?
“Hayama’s death distorted everything its thorn-like fingers came into contact with”
Saki got drunk at Yumiko’s birthday party thanks to Yumiko’s botched attempt at a cruel prank toward Yukino. Yumiko spiking that drink, then her later initiating the game of Spin the Bottle…huh. Come to think of it, it would be interesting to read an Oregairu story in which there is a chapter/scene involving such a game. Now I’m snickering imagining the bottle landing for Yumiko and Hachiman, and Hachiman – to the surprise of all but a few (Iroha would be smirking knowingly and cruelly at this point) – displaying no trepidation or eagerness whatsoever at having to kiss Yumiko, before, during or after, which probably won’t help Yumiko’s disposition considering that she is supposed to be one of the most popular and attractive kids in Sobu High. Which would only make it worse if the bottle is spun again and Hachiman is made to kiss either Yui, Yukino or Iroha.
“absence from school”
Saki was heavily traumatized to a point where she mutilated herself. And she already had problems that caused her to neglect her classes.
“the deformed soulessness in her eyes”
Hachiman saw the cuts on her arm, and realized what she was doing. I wonder what she thinks of that.
“all sight of a scholarship and the future Saki had once mapped out for herself”
…she went to that birthday party, of a person she actively dislikes no less, for the sake of one of her only friends; Ebina Hina. And Ebina, Yui and Yumiko were the ones who neglected to properly dispose of a spiked drink, at an occasion with multiple guests who’d be seeking refreshment. (sigh) God damn it…seriously, Broken Glass is way too believable and conceivable for me; that Yumiko in her birthday celebration would plot to prank Yukino only for it all to go horribly, horribly wrong.
“post traumatic stress of a violent incident”
Taishi is not stupid. He knows that something happened at that birthday party, and not just Hayato’s death. He may even suspect that Hayato’s death is not a suicide, and/or that Hachiman wasn’t killed by a random burglar.
“that widely feared place of no return”
Most people fear that place. Hachiman dove headlong into it. And now, in his letter, he tells Komachi that she can do the same and yet return from it; that she is stronger than she gives herself credit for.
“never understood the limits of his feelings, had just kept falling and falling”
Hachiman has got to be one of the best protagonist-characters I have ever seen.
“after years of trying”
Not just for herself, but for her family whom she has made big sacrifices for in the past.
“Hachiman had Komachi”
When he met her in what would later turn out to be their final meeting, Hachiman likely knew that he was going to die.
“I can’t believe something as ridiculous as that club even existed”
(looks at Hiratsuka Shizuka) What a strange person.
“You’re not still in contact with”
Kawasaki knows it was Yui. I’m guessing she hasn’t told another living soul. Yui didn’t just kill Hayato, accidentally or not; she had the presence of mind and the know-how to make it look like a suicide. Said it before; Yuigahama Yui is no less damaged or interesting than Hachiman and Yukino.
“his capacity to say the wrong thing”
Hmm.
“They wouldn’t know what to do if something was true. They could only comprehend something if it was false”
And you, Komachi? Are you all that different from them?
“she truly doesn’t”
I love this story.
“Isn’t that something Hachiman would say?”
How is Shuya going to react when/if he realizes that Komachi is now behaving 100 percent like her brother?
“I really, genuinely thought that I’d turned a corner”
Hachiman knew her, better than anyone. He knew that she could only truly turn a corner by finding the truth behind his imminent death.
“I thought things would get easier”
You can’t put something behind you if you still want something from it.
“she just wasn’t the same person I’d grown up with”
Ava Elliot: ‘You’re destroying who she is.’
Takeshi Kovacs: ‘Someone else did that already. She’s…shattered. Whoever she was is dead.’
Ava Elliot: ‘What…what am I supposed to do with that?’
Takeshi Kovacs: ‘Same thing as she did. Adapt.’
“They’re just not the same anymore”
(looks at the title ‘Altered Carbon’) Dammit, with passing time, I hope more and more for that Oregairu crossover.
“I’m never going to be the same person again”
I thought of Minami Sagami.
“Always think of the good, always keep moving on”
This exact same mantra was advocated to me by a family member. Let’s just say that I refuse to follow it. In my opinion, in a true, genuine relationship, you don’t ignore the bad and only focus on the good.
Gregory House: ‘The most successful marriages are based on lies.’
“Shuya’s advice is good too…sound so insincere”
Dammit, Taishi, stop becoming an awesome character!
“whenever Chikashi Shuya is involved”
Hmm. So Taishi has NEVER liked Shuya? Interesting.
“a Hikigaya family trait”
I love this.
“his thoughts and feelings are never foreign to her”
They found kinship with each other.
“he too is aware that she can see through him”
I thought of Gregory House and James Wilson.
“hold down a proper job like Shuya”
Hachiman saw Shuya as a corporate slave, and Komachi cannot deny that her boyfriend becomes a different person whenever he is at work.
“We aren’t exactly high boasts, are we?”
And yet the Hikigaya siblings grew close to them anyway.
“at the slightest mention of his name”
Hmm. What does Taishi know about him that Komachi does not (or is refusing to acknowledge)?
“Shuya’s doing great”
Lie. He is doing anything but great, and Komachi knows it. She said that deliberately, to prod Taishi for information.
“Why? What’s he said this time? Or what hasn’t he said-“
…this goes beyond personal dislike. Taishi has a grudge against Shuya. Something happened between them.
“You still think this about”
Honestly, from an outsider’s perspective, I’d have to say that Taishi cannot be considering a reliable witness/testimony as his personal feelings and opinions toward Hikigaya Komachi are dubious and not-entirely-trustworthy. He may be sincere in that his animosity for Shuya is not rooted in him having romantic feelings for Komachi, but…yeah.
“How many times have you needed to”
Shuya is very, very far from a perfect boyfriend, and for that matter, Komachi herself is far from a perfect girlfriend…to each other, at least. GOF, I have to agree with you that a romantic relationship between Hachiman and Yukino wouldn’t necessarily be the smoothest or most stable one. I look forward to more chapters of While The Snow Fell.
“the stupid, emotional woman”
If Komachi is saying all this, it means she has thought of it herself without Taishi needing to be there.
“she doesn’t want to be held in the balance. She wants them to be separate, and black and white”
Komachi’s struggle in this story is both fascinating and terrifying.
“It’s perfectly possible to be in…keep making the same mistakes. And…hurting you”
I agree with Taishi that it is possible. After all, countless relationships are exactly like that; all you have to do to make it last is to lie to and deceive yourself.
And this is why Hachiman’s ultimate desire – to have something genuine – moved Yui, Yukino and (in my opinion especially) Iroha so much.
I wonder where Isshiki Iroha could be in this story. If she still harbored/harbors romantic feelings for Hachiman, would she elect to investigate Hachiman’s death herself? Considering that she is a high-functioning, manipulative, two-faced sociopath…
“You don’t know him, and you don’t love him, and he doesn’t love you”
Komachi is not allowing Taishi to finish telling her what he wants to tell her.
“He was about to say something”
I love this so much.
“The final droplets of strength in her voice evaporates”
She went to Taishi hoping to find solace and comfort in their friendship, but she underestimated said friendship.
“you don’t need to leave. Not if you don’t want”
He did not give up on Saki, and he does not intend to give up on Komachi. She’s hurt and lost and needs help, and he wants to help her…even if it means hurting her even more.
…man. Friendship – real friendship - sucks. Christ, no wonder Hayato surrounded himself with sycophants after having a close friendship with Yukino that ended badly.
“you will be able to see that you meant far more to me than I could ever hope to express”
She prefers a memory of her brother to Shuya. Man…Hachiman and Taishi could see that Komachi’s relationship with Shuya was never going to end well.
“I can hardly bring myself to care”
That would only hurt Shuya even more.
“her eyes catch sight of”
I love this.
“the building so many walk past in the centre of Chiba”
So Yukino stayed in Chiba, and went on to become a lawyer; someone who presumably is meant to defend or condemn people according to the law.
The problem, of course, is that laws are made by the wealthy and powerful to protect their own interests.
“had seen the necessity of reading it”
Yukino is Yui’s best friend. Wait…are the Kawasaki siblings suspicious of the circumstances surrounding Hachiman’s homicide?
“myriad of questions already beginning to form at the edges of her mind”
I grinned at this. Like brother, like sister.
Komachi knew too, didn’t she; that Hayato did not kill himself.
“two more thing
12/19/2019 c4 HarimaHige
Awesome chapter
12/17/2019 c4 1BlackPsych
I thought Yumiko being written as dead was a typo for Hayato, but seeing her death mentioned a second time made things more clear. That really sucks that she's dead and I get why her death would be another huge blow to everyone. Sobu lost its King and Queen, two relatively well-adjusted popular kids. Not sure about the circumstances of her death, but I wouldn't be surprised if she had actually killed herself unlike Hayato. Morale must have hit an all time low and it's even ingrained in someone like Komachi, who was always indirectly involved. I can't believe she went all the way back to the old neighborhood just to see Taishi.

I was actually being very critical of Taishi's demeanor at first, because I had sort of skimmed through his and Komachi's conversation at times the first time I read it. I was cringing, thinking Taishi was actually still in love with Komachi and disparaged Shuya for that reason alone. But actually rereading it completely changed my initial opinion lol. I was decrying him as a pathetic doormat who should have moved on years ago. But, if he was telling the truth, then I actually have a bit of respect for the guy. He may not be holding down a job and comes off as a a teenager, despite being a grown man, but at least he can keep it real with people he cares for. Must be hard to have his valid opinion of Shuya be taken lightly because of his, supposedly, past feelings for Komachi. It's terrible that Komachi has repeatedly ran to him and other people whenever it got tough with Shuya. I mean I can't blame her since Shuya sounds awesome on paper. But "he may not always be there for me, but he's there for the MOST part"?! The hell? The Hachiman of yesteryear, before everything else, wouldn't have ever allowed her to feel so lonely that she'd be okay with that kind of guy. This is the same girl who practically said she wanted to marry someone twisted like her brother. So much for that - now she's with a man who's the antithesis of Hachiman. And a part of that may have been because of her sudden estrangement with her brother.

Well, Taishi and Komachi have everything that happened to their older siblings as bit of an excuse. I mean, Komachi has flaws and signs of stunted growth in certain areas. Her loyalty to her man isn't the problem, it's what anyone in love would do for their s/o. The problem is how she got to this point and the flaws of the man she's defending.

Taishi and Komachi witnessed the downfall of their respective role models in a single month. They were solid older siblings, too stubborn for their own good. I imagine the backlash that Sobu as a whole felt when Hayato and Yumiko died couldn't compare to the long-term effects that Saki's and Hachiman's regression had on their younger siblings. All of a sudden, they had to fend for themselves as if they had already died. Sudden loneliness and strain in the household, especially while they were still in their formative teenage years, must have been hard on these two younger siblings.

Perhaps things would be different if they had lived and not gone through such an ordeal. Maybe Hachiman of yesteryear wouldn't have let Komachi feel so lonely, estranged, and date a guy who (despite being awesome on paper) is probably up to no good. A well-adjusted Saki would have given Taishi a good shoulder to lean on after Komachi broke his heart for the first time, but she would have encouraged him to go find another girl and hold down a good job like she probably would have.

This was a nice chapter. Had me feeling like crap, but that's what you're supposed to invoke. Thanks.
42 Page 1 .. Last Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service