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for Life is not always what it seems

6/26/2019 c1 monsterjamvadim
THIS GUY IS FUCKIN STUPID
6/10/2019 c1 55Wildebunny the Eternal
How is this "good" when it fails to apply the basic rules of grammar?
6/9/2019 c1 2OrangeMacawWorld
Hello, there. My username is OrangeMacawWorld, and for almost ten years, I have been writing unpublished fiction and nonfiction, on top of fan fiction for this archive. Today, I will gather from my own experience to the best of my ability to assist you in improving your writing by bestowing my honest feedback upon you.

Concerning what I just read, I will definitely provide you credit for originality, and I see this plot as bearing potential if given more attention and care. Regarding the negative aspects in this story, they were quite prevalent, I’m afraid. The spelling is passable, though the grammar needs improvement overall.

To cite examples, in the story itself, I noticed that “bag” was confused for “back,” “where” was confused for “were,” and so on and so forth. There were many instances as well where past tense and past participle verbs were used interchangeably, and the number of run-on sentences seemed to be far too many.

In addition, make sure that the opening letter of a sentence is always capitalized (with a few highly specific exceptions.) Another thing, TV is always capitalized as well. Lastly, I view the detail as having been far too little to have effectively immersed me into the story. If you would like to see examples as to how detail should be implemented in writing, I recommend that you have a look at either one of my stories, or those written by Sorrelwing, Ricardo the Black Hawk, or Kraft58.

With that, if you adhere to my advice, I think you can certainly make your stories far better. Apart from that, have a good day.

Respectfully, OrangeMacawWorld
6/8/2019 c1 25RiodanJaneiro97
The chapter was good, The Grammar and punctuation could have been better. But not bad

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