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12/28/2020 c11 Mistletainn
If the Chief felt regret in teaming up with MBI right after he told Homura otherwise, that's understandable. Same with Homura getting upset by said decision. If, IF things escalated in a cliched way (e.g. misunderstandings) when Chief could have just tell Homura that things happened and children were killed, though...
12/27/2020 c11 Guest
Another nice chapter.
Only part that sticks out is that you were maybe too explicit with the gay euphemisms and maybe had 2-3 too many. While funny, they broke immersion for me. I'd suggest cutting the last three or maybe replacing them with one more.
12/22/2020 c11 1Spetsnaz Pinkie Pie
wonder how Homura will react when his chest grows?
12/18/2020 c10 4kamorge0
Alright. We're finally on my weekend so I can type an actual review. Let's go.

So Feather 11 fixed a lot of the problems I had with Feather 10 as I mentioned in my grammar review. The biggest change was that scenes felt like they had more purpose and connected with the narrative far better in the most recent chapter. Ice sekirei shows personality and character that she didn't have previously - good. John playing straight man to Miya's feminine wiles - good. Homura and John's interactions as they struggle to find stable ground they're both willing to stand on - excellent. I didn't feel like I was reading padded wordcount at any point during this 24k chapter and that says a lot to its quality.

Starting off with my favorite parts and going down the list. Homura was the star and I loved every scene they were together. The gay questioning felt a little OOC for him as straight as he's portrayed canonically this early in the story (pun intended). The fact that Homura is really concerned that he's bonding with a man as a man makes sense with his character so I understand why you brought it out. I like the touch you added that Homura isn't changing to a female yet because that would imply John has a preference. He doesn't. Ergo, it makes sense for Homura to stay his default gender. It really only makes sense for Homura to start changing when Yume, Karasuba, or Miya (should you so choose) make some sexual headway with the guy.

Miya probing John about Karasuba was enjoyable. Really has me curious what role she has in this universe. It feels like she should play a more front and center role and I'd personally enjoy it if she has more actual feelings expressed. Right now she's just her canon self — sly, above it all, and ultimately kind to her core. Unlike the MC of Sekirei, I think she could catch a real case of the feelings for John. IDK what you're doing with her but it'd be a real bummer if this was a road to nowhere.

Ice (I will not remember her name) is something I'm more... skeptical of. I can only see so many red flags go off before I feel like I'm being bludgeoned with them. Everything you wrote about her screams "tragic impetus" to me. She wants John so bad that it basically doesn't make sense for you to give him to her. Someone THAT obsessed tends to be story cancer if they're front and present, meaning you intend to use her as a plot device. Maybe dick scientist adjusts her in a weird way or forcibly wings her himself and uses Ice to get revenge on MIB, John having agreed to help deal with out of control Sekirei gets put on a collision path with her and is forced to tragically terminate her, Ice becomes the motivation for John to take sekirei plan more seriously moving forward. I'd like to be wrong and have her be a main character but I doubt it. Yume, Homura, Karrasuba, and Miya are already a lot of threads to juggle so I'm pretty sure Ice is doomed to plot devicery.

Soren and John continue to interact well. Any more drama would be tedious and any less would be unbelievable, so you've hit the sweet-spot real well. Dead family was a good touch to get John motivated. We'll see how Homura reacts to John looking like he's allying with MIB.

Great chapter and a lot of fun. I can't say Ice is predictable until I actually see what you write, it's just that she feels predictable at this point of the story. Maybe you're setting me up? Who knows? I look forward to finding out in future chapters.
12/16/2020 c11 2KiroZen
I definitely appreciate the extra "chapter" at the end, giving some insight on how the rest of Blue Team acclimized to civillian life. I'd definitely like it to continue, even if it likely means that we'll have to wait for longer for updates.

But I enjoy works more for their quality than their update pace, really. If the quality fics can update quickly, that's just a bonus in my mind. Take it at your own pace.
12/14/2020 c11 4kamorge0
Leaving a quick spelling and grammar note. Will do my qualitative review after a few more passes. I instantly love this chapter and it fixes a lot of the problems the last one has, but I'll need time to put into words why I don't have since I'm at work.

If your that averse - if you're that averse.

Get into his good side - get on his good side. You don't get into a side, particular as that may seem.

The thought of people doing something so disturbing such as that - something so disturbing. Or something as disturbing as that. Feel free to rewrite the sentence if those two options lack the impact you were looking for, but it doesn't work as is.

I sounded nearly exact to slavery - nearly identical. Both adjectives and synonyms, but because English one works in this context and one doesn't.

It has become easier to control that until now. So I don't know what you want to say exactly. MC had just said he is not attracted full-stop. That could be a fruedian slip in his own kind indicating he is starting to be attracted to people, but it lies in direct conflict with what he said. So if he's changing and not realizing it, leave it as is. If he isn't attracted full-stop then it makes things confusing worded this way.

The Boss is inside - the boss is inside. 'The Soren is inside' doesn't make sense, ergo lowercase.

Leaning against the doorway on what must have been the living room - to what must have been? I think that's what you meant but you know better than I do. Immediately after must've gets used thrice in a paragraph. Repetition sticks out because it's an uncommon compound.
12/14/2020 c11 Ceps
Really you wasted that much of a chapter on a stupid omake plz don't do that
12/13/2020 c11 PsiOmicron
I must say, I did not go into this expecting to enjoy it as much as I did. Great work!
12/13/2020 c11 HaywireEagle
I have to admit. This is one of the best written Halo stories I have ever read and I am on the lookout for more.
12/13/2020 c11 Sparkysbro
I'm having a tough time figuring out of Soren is an antagonist or just a jaded potential ally. Great work!
12/13/2020 c11 8Slim A Lou Prime
A wonderful chapter worth the wait! I was thinking though if Homura likes the spartan types I think he would have been a nice par with Linda... Hehehe domme mommy Linda... ok I'll stop.
12/13/2020 c11 Just a random guy117
Nice chapter,
Man I really hoping that Miya joins in the harem. All of her interactions with John have been positive so far.
12/13/2020 c11 Spartan3909
Thanks for the chapter _.
12/13/2020 c11 LunaAnt
Another good read, is John going to get some armor?
12/13/2020 c11 A
Honestly I like the power level of John. Too many stories have their MC be roflstomping machines and the story quickly gets boring because there is no suspense. Here I like how John still has his moments but also isn't just an op character. There's always people flaming why isn't the MC a god because they need to self insert because their lives are so shitty and they are so powerless so I wouldn't pay them much attention
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