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for Broker Report on the Citadel : Internal Structure and Organization

8/28 c2 1Coment9
Huh the council ACTUALLY took the reapers seriously!?
7/21 c1 Ase Of SpADeZ
Thanks for posting Xabiar!
7/20 c5 AllisterH
Hey LogicalPremise (and Xabiar et al)

Glad to see you guys still with this...Really liked that the Citadel is actually doing something in preparation even outside of Shepard (and also the main reason why I always recommend the Premiseverse)

However, is there ANY chance that Sara et al would get a hold of this as Sara's impression of the Citadel is that it isn't doing anything which is clearly wrong.
7/19 c5 Nogui
The Biotic Corps and Fidel both are not suspicious at all.

Excellent file. I like how CINT seems to be doing a fair job at countering the horrible BS the SIU is doing.
6/6 c4 1baud001
I don't get why procurement of military hardware by the Citadel would be so important, since. AFAIK, the Citadel fleets are using ships on loan from the member species.
6/1 c4 10Janizary
Had this sitting on the backburner for a bit, until I had a chance to read it all at once.

Huge info packet. Love the detail. Love the 'personnel of note'.
5/25 c4 Ase Of SpADeZ
Xabiar my boy, this is most excellent.
5/25 c4 2MonkeyEpoxy
"The most infamous example was when she inspected Chora's Den of all places, and was jumped by a few criminal patrons who thought she was C-Sec. She killed both of them, and marked the resulting bloodstains as in violation of health standards – in addition to every other violation she found."

Lmao. What a legend
5/24 c4 Rangersunrider
Really loved the space Indiana Jones character. Is there any material written about Griannon and Arthann civilization? Those segments on precursor civilizations are especially a delight to read. Great work as usual.
5/22 c4 Nogui
Well then.

Council actually taking the Reapers extremely seriously.

Influence Orbs involved in biotic research

A space Indiana Jones.

I love all these little nuggets.
12/26/2019 c3 IThinkIWasBob
The Elcor section was hilarious.

I also thought it was interesting that the report was seemingly not written by someone in the know that the Broker effectively killed Shepard. Perhaps I'm reading too much into how the writing character phrased certain things, but if not, I thought it was a very nice and subtle way of showing information compartmentalization inside the Broker Network. It's a lot easier to write from a gods eye view that's ostensibly a character instead of an actual character with information flaws. Nice.
12/25/2019 c3 LifeIsAGreatAdventure
Fascinating and fun read. My only concerns would be that I think you've set Tevos' age a little low, and same with Sparatus. I'd have encouraged 500-ish with Tevos as 305 (if a known figure) would make it pretty obvious her strings are pulled from Thessia and for Sparatus, though he could be the Turian version of JFK or Obama, another ten years or so would seem to make sense particularly as long as you say Turian counselors can sit their seats which implies a lifespan a little longer than-or at least comparable to-humans' 150 years in that era. Thanks to everyone for your hard work on this fascinating read, looking forward to OSABC2 ch53 soon.
12/25/2019 c3 Nogui
Ok, first of all, holy fuck! This is massive! Let's get started:

-It seems the process for salarians to pick their Councilor is akin to the Hunger Games both metaphorically and in terms of survival rates

-"If expected delays are expected" Redundancy?

-The Open Forum bit made me lol

-"If we are ever openly defeated, it will do significant harm to our image and embolden the elements within the Citadel to continue their actions to undermine us." As Ilium has shown.

-Tevos, Discerning? Holy shit...

-Marvin Eliksni...quite the big thonk

-Damm...do not mess with the Asari Embassy's "Customs and Legal"

-I like how thoroughbly you developed the idea of using the embassies as both public and subtle projections of the species' power (STG, AIS and such). Nice twist on the turians, with their demonstrations.

-I was expecting the Elcor to have some twist on their embassy... that "night club" shtick was funny. But it was the Internal Security part that got me laughing like a lunatic. Well done.
12/2/2019 c2 1baud001
Cool stories. And it's nice to see shit has always been fucked in that galaxy.

But I wonder how you can have in universe conflicts on the order of major events, since that's the only conflicts I could see (different order between first contact with batarians & quarians and the refusal; different order between the second Krogan rebellion and the Geth rebellion).

And I'm a little disappointed when LP says the truth is in discord chat logs (even if it's just "I changed my mind between the two pieces")
11/6/2019 c2 1TheRedMezek
Good lord. This here is the skeleton of a truly massive space opera that you could easily flesh out into numerous stories. I haven't read a ME galactic history before that felt like that.

What hooked me was seeing how you made the formation of the Council work. The logic for unity was sound and something I've seen work before in real history. It also presented a beautiful, simple idea of what the Citadel would be, which then became broken, disspirited and confused as confounding factors played out. I don't have time to write all the things I loved about this history.

I do have some criticism though, something I see a lot in histories both real and fictional. The story gets more detailed as it goes on, with similar amounts of text given to smaller and less important events, without much recognition that the timescale has changed. It went from 'galactic history' to 'recent events' and 'very recent events' without a structural distinction. I mention this because it's a pet peeve of mine with histories. Overall, this writing is amazing.
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