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for Heir of the artificial Gamer system

9/10 c4 mhihabak
he literally had no reason to kill issei's parents if thinking that leaving them alive even though they have never seen him is a risk and you should kill them and right after saying that you rape his mother instead of cleaning the crime scene in a proper way instead of killing and raping a couple of nonmagical humans that have not seen nor heard you if you wanted an excuse to get into the parent's bedroom and rape the mom don't make a sh*ty excuse like taking care of witnesses and the worst part is that you still get caught
9/10 c3 mhihabak
The mechanism behind the shadow clones you use is full of holes I mean instead of giving each shadow clone a specific amount of mana to summon lets to say 100MP for every clone, instead, you made it so every time you make a new clone they half the amount of mana that you and the previous clones have to make you all equal to each other in mana capacity that's confusing and completely different than how they were meant to be so, of course, you're not going to die because no matter how many times you devid a number it's not going to reach 0 and it doesn't make sense because if you make thousands of clones one clone would only have around 0.01 MP and that definitely shouldn't be enough for it to function
7/20 c2 Awesome Eason
These days any random person gets up and write gamer fics and they think they've written something worthwhile...*sighs*
5/4 c13 SPECIALGUY
Regarding the AN. First and foremost you are posting to a public forum where critique and assessment are built in with this nifty review tool. Commenting a big piss off to what could be construed as legitimate criticism really isn't any better than the current movie industry telling most of its fans to fuck off and its generally proven to be a poor strategy. You self admittedly point out that skipping over the forest training was a bit of a mistake and then say don't criticize you for it or else... Its one thing to acknowledge it and saying lets just get on with the story but to go out of your way to try and what... inspire some public humiliation for legitimate critique? It comes off like a small and yappy dog trying to be intimidating to cover insecurities. Instead I'd say have confidence and be dignified. Confidence lets lesser concerns and unwarranted remarks slide off because it is beneath it. You are a decent writer, perhaps needing some planning for more cohesion and I think you know that based on the self-admission mentioned earlier. This isn't to say to accept nonsensical harassing and stupid comments that are 10 words equating to story bad or kekw lol fail or some other such diatribe. But acknowledge the legitimate stuff, use it to be better. We all have room for self improvement and quite frankly its boring to remain the same. Isolating or rejecting extrinsic motivators positive or negative is a weak play.

With that said you can either choose to ignore this and try to lambast me for this or accept that this as a hopeful message to support you in being a better writer/creator.
4/30 c3 1ZeroSpearow
why do everyone gets so fixed on the boosted gear?
I mean, its not the strongest thing around, the sephirot grail is the broken stuff that gamers should be aiming for, that thing can mass produce any sacred gear, the only limitation is the person imagination, you can literally ressurect the bible god as your persona slave and loyal servant if you want to.
The grail, powered by a gamer system is the most broken thing a person can get on DxD... You can make an army of Great Reds and Ophis, there is nothing that comes close, its the holy grail and the sephirot grail, and to get that, you just need to extract it from Valery tepes, the girl is practically a mindless husk, its free to be taken, and almost no one goes for it on the beginning.
4/30 c8 Guest
Lol all that nobility training went out the window and Rias became an angry gorilla...
4/30 c7 Guest
So why didn't he just mindfuck that succubus?

She insulted him and basically told him to fuck off of you aren't going have sex with her.

For a evil guy he has odd moments of being weird.

He's supposed to be some edgy asshole who does whatever he wants and anyone that disrespect him will die or get raped.

Yet somehow he leaves thebsuccubus alone.
4/30 c4 Guest
Buddy the first 3-4 chapters could've been done in 1 chapter.

Also killing Issei quest you put it as failed for the part where he was found out, how?

It was just three people in the house, unless Rias had a spy already watching the house then why didn't your OP address that?

Wouldn't he have been paranoid enough to be like "wdym I failed that check? Nobody was there and I killed everyone in the house!"
4/30 c14 The-.-Spectator4456
FINALLY A NEW CHAPTER!

A SIGN THAT THE AUTHOR HAS NOT FORSAKEN THIS HOLY BOOK!

(Sorry for the cringe but i really like this fic)
4/29 c1 kamikazedrew
I'm afraid to tell you that you would break your eye socket if you shot your sniper like that.
4/29 c14 Qursa
Wow you are back. I really missed the insanity. It was so long that I had to reread all the chapters again to remember what happened. Your new chapter feels like the old ones. If there was a grammar I didn't see. I am not a grammar Nazi so I don't give a fuck. The plot is still good. I am waiting for another chapter. Keep going and God Speed. 10/10
2/26 c3 Jmechan24
Store the bed sheets at least and thrown the bodies to the zombies, wonder if issei were killed on the empty id what would have happened to ddraig
2/26 c4 Jmechan24
Shouldn't he do it on the empty id? XD
2/26 c2 Jmechan24
Noo, not summonee and necromancer XD, go for eromancer and empath later if you can
2/18 c2 green2008
now this is a true man act weak then suddenly rip off clothes and flex like a god descending from heaven
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