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for Heir of the artificial Gamer system

7/22/2020 c5 Adeptus Academicus
Oxygen isn't actually fuel. Burning is an exothermic reduction reaction between a fuel and oxygen. For example: hydrogen can be burned in oxygen to produce water. The reaction of diatomic oxygen with identical molecules would likely produce ozone which is an overall endothermic reaction.
Loving the science based magic, hope this helps (since you've mentioned thermal manipulation, these principles could be utilised in either direction...)

Keep up the good work,
7/22/2020 c10 XenoLucifer
This story has too much thinking and theorising and not enough world building.
7/22/2020 c11 Primarx
hope to see more in future. looks interesting
7/20/2020 c1 FriggleBerry
Subsonic .50 cal huh? Subsonic means slower than the speed of sound. Which seems kinda counterintuitive when using a sniper rifle especially a .50 cal
7/19/2020 c11 CruelFlowerDemon
Hey hey hey! Wassup punk!? Here from web novel. Absolutely love the fic you wrote! Gamer system, evil, psychopathic MC and RAPE! what else do you need in life? Actually, I was wondering exactly that! If you haven't read any rape then what the fuck are you doing?! Spice up yo life bitch!(Coming from someone who lives a daily monotone life) Hmm, makes me ponder about lolis... let's end it here.
7/18/2020 c11 Kathadoryan
Uuuuhhh I'd rather not join a dickcord thank very much, sounds pretty gay to me eheh.
On a more serious note, I'm enjoying this. Not too many writers change the world/realm/universe this early on, it is refreshing.
7/17/2020 c2 Kathadoryan
okokok so... he just made himself a bloody space marine with extra mind powers!
7/14/2020 c11 2Snazzy Snake
I eagerly await more. I do hope though that you won’t spend too much time on the Familiar of Zero world. If you do decide to do so, perhaps it could be a separate fic. Whatever the case, I like your character and story so far despite the fact that there does appear to be a lot of filler.
7/11/2020 c5 Guest
7/6/2020 c11 1redHussar
Ok, I need to appologise. I really hated the breaking of the 4 wall, so I threw a fit, but then I decided to continue.

It was mostly quite cool. His psychopathic ways, lemons, manipulations, not giving a damn... I loved how he forced powerful mages to be his servants. Not even once did he consider behaving like goody two shoes heroes. I hope that he will seduce Louise and the princess and will take them as his pets. Of course, long mind games with maniputating brain chemistry would be nice. And Siesta - as long as he doesn't fall in love, he could always do what nobles do with maids...

I would slightly tone down system being an ass and MC acting like a weeb.
7/5/2020 c11 Lord Asmodeus
This is brilliant. The protagonist has a talent for theatrics which I heavily enjoy.

And on the matter of structuring speech, the first is to replace 'said' with vocal adjectives 'stuttered', 'muttered', 'articulated', 'expressed'. Each have their contexts, so you have to select an adjective which suits the context. Second is to use identifiers, what else identifies Louis instead of her name? Maybe 'void mage', the 'third daughter of House Vallière' et cetera. So in practice, you could say: "stuttered the Void Mage" instead of just using "said Louis".
7/3/2020 c11 bigbossxx6
Nice chapter dude
7/3/2020 c11 frankiebayer2002
Plz update soon
7/3/2020 c1 redHussar
I immediately dropped the story after breaking the 4 wall
7/3/2020 c3 frankiebayer2002
Please update soon
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