FanFiction.Net
Just In
Community
Forum
V
More
for If not for Umbridge

11/27/2023 c1 harryPotterFan
should have called it if not for umbitch
9/26/2023 c25 Something Random 52
Of all songs, Cake By The Ocean came on at the middle of this chapter
8/5/2023 c40 2Rokakku
Well written story, the words flowed really well and you could feel the raw emotions through the way you wrote the dialogue which is hard to find in stories that focus on the emotions of the characters as opposed to plot. I found your Daphne a breath of fresh air, her relationship with her mother was extremely compelling. Additionally, Ron as a character was brilliantly done and kudos to you for the way you had written him.

Unfortunately, the story lacked balance. It's obvious this story is heavily canon influenced which is not a bad thing per say and yet I had hoped there would've been changes that you could've made that moved away from that route.

Your Harry is extremely passive. Way more than canon and it was frustrating reading the emotional turmoil he was going through and him not doing much about it to get himself out of that rut.

You emphasised that Daphne was a pillar of sort to him, she was his light and yet every time something major occurs, he goes back to that same pitiful mindset which introduced unnecessary angst that made this story sometimes vexing to read. Sure he's emotionally stunted with how he grew up but seriously what 15/16 year old looks down at their shoes during a confrontational scene, it's just very bizarre.

It's obvious that Harry wants a future where he's alive, where those he loves are alive and yet he does completely nothing to achieve those goals. I mentioned that the story lacked balance and that is what I mean for this part. One of your main plots was that of the prophecy. Harry is supposed to be Voldemort's equal and yet I find that impossible with they way you have written Harry as a character.

It's clear with this chapter that Harry has finally grown some balls and is ready to take the war head on and yet I find that entirely unbelievable especially with the fact that the story is coming to it's conclusion soon and I find no believable way that your Harry will be able to beat someone like Voldemort if he's losing to Sirius in 15 seconds in Chapter 36. I'm not saying he should be some overpowered kid that should be on equal footing with Voldemort but if he can't even beat Sirius, someone who hasn't even had the chance to duel anyone since before he was sent to Azkaban then I am not sure on how you're going to finish this story if I presume you're going to make Harry be the one to kill Voldemort which I'm guessing is correct with how big your focus was about the prophecy.

I'm not trying to disparage you or tell you to write a story the way I want you to write it. At the end of the day, you can write it however you like, yet as a reader, you want to have some kind of faith knowing that the protagonist of the story is not completely useless in the face of the villain and yet I can't help but feel your Harry feels way more fragile than compared to canon. In my opinion, if that was changed, I would've enjoyed your story a ton more.
7/27/2023 c41 bartle.john
This has been one of my favourite Harry/Daphne fics, I patiently await you to finish the story.
6/27/2023 c41 7Lord of mystics
I read this story from. Start to finish and it is well written. I'll wait for the next chapters
5/19/2023 c41 Hinny17
WOW. that was an incredible, amazing, brilliant story. as your being my first ever Haphne story I've ever read and never being a fan of it you have made me a fan of this ship. there are just so many different aspects of this story that I loved. I think it's one of my to 3 favorite fics of all time. I loved the slow build you had for their relationship. it just felt so natural and they were so great together. and I really thought you kept Harry true to canon while introducing him to someone he normally would never consider. and the friendships you brought into the fold were so well written. I LOVED all of your OCs. and how you handle the Horcruxs was so well done. I really hope you're able to complete this fic someday I will be anxiously awaiting it's completion. thank you for this story from a hardcore Hinny shipper
5/16/2023 c24 counter12
I saw last edit was a couple months ago, please keep writing this story!
5/8/2023 c41 Shandablonde
Thank you for writing a fantastic compelling story, I hope to read more in the future!
3/22/2023 c41 Cat
I've really enjoyed this story and hope you can find the path for this story that makes you content with the direction it's going to go. I understand that sometimes one needs a break from heavier topics and to focus on more lighthearted things. I've had to do that many times in my life. Please don't let reviewers get to your head and make you feel rushed or that you need to go in a different direction than you wanted to. We started reading this story because we liked what you had created. You are a good writer, please trust yourself and have confidence in your creative output. I look forward to the next chapter whenever it may be posted. Take your time.
3/22/2023 c41 seaffilt
A wonderful story, I read it in 2 days. I hope everything will be fine and you'll be back soon with chapters :)
3/10/2023 c41 2Chesterton
Thanks for all the work and a great story! Don’t let the negative feedback get you down. You’re a fantastic author and have brought me many many hours of happiness with all your stories! Thank you. Keep it up! I hope to see more from you!
3/8/2023 c23 61D.J. Scales
Okay that was a pretty well thought out chapter.
3/4/2023 c41 45CPO Backstreet
I'm sorry you've had a hard time writing this story. Regardless of what you may think of it, I've enjoyed what I've read of it. (I gather there's been a lot of rewriting going on for those reading in real time.) I hope you feel able to continue it at some point and I'll be keeping an eye out. (Hard to do with Fanfiction dot net not sending me e-mail alerts anymore, but I'll do my best!) Good luck with it all!
3/1/2023 c2 HossamGasser0
just how often was Ron seen in the books speaking with his mouth full?

Harry's "open-mindedness" about Slytherin is not much greater than Ron's :C
3/1/2023 c1 HossamGasser0
Why, oh why and when did the goddamn ron anti slytherin bs start in this fandom. Just another thing to add against ron :c. Hell ron never asid anything against the house except at year1 which is extremely excusable and understandable.

And its weird seeing daphne criticize Ron in her mind for him asking who she is "Draco's comments about his brain are not complete lies" meh.

Also tbh not a fan of the idea of daphne and hermione connection but aight.

Damn it this why it sucks to comment on old fanfics lmao
1,055 Page 1 2 3 4 11 .. Last Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service