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for Rage Towards It: The 11th Hunger Games

9/3/2020 c3 4BradiLain
Laurel was very pleasant to follos here at the beginning - I don't have a lot to say about her other than that, but she's definitely pleasant enough. I think that the most striking part of the pov she had was definitely the advice given towards the end. a lot of times you see people in the capitol, whether that be mentors or escorts or anybody else, telling the tributes to pretend to be everything they're not for the sponsors. So having people so early in the history of the games saying the opposite is really thought provoking, especially followed up by Jarius talking about how victors are not honestly portrayed.

Jarius and Dakota also had some riveting conversation over here, now didn't they? They have a really odd dynamic. They seem to be getting along decently well, but there's also a sort of tension betweeen them? It's hard to explain, but I definitely feel it. The same thing goes for Gabriel and Dakota. Although, Gabriel definitely is giving me sort of antagonistic vibes here. He seems too put together, like he's playing his pieces precisely how he would like them. I don't know if I trust him or not.

The last pov was probably the most interesting to me. The characters just vibed the best together, it felt like a group of friends just sort of chatting amongst each other. The recklessness of Heather, the intelligence of Ellis, and the no nonsense sort of atitude from Minerva. They gel together really nicely and were a joy overall. Nice little chapter - I hope you're excited for the cast you've got! I'm excited to meet them.
8/25/2020 c3 2optimisms
So happy to see that both my submissions made it in! I'm super excited, it's gonna be a wild ride.

I like seeing all the different mentors, though I must say I wish we'd seen something from Judith or Naomi! They're my favorites from just reading the bios on the website. My favorite that we've seen in the actual story is definitely Minerva, and I liked her interactions with Ellis as well.
8/24/2020 c3 5AlexFalTon
Laurel - Well, she's still a Capitolite supporting the Hunger Games, which is certainly a form of naive evil or affable evil. But she seems to genuinely want to help a kid from Twelve to win, and that's better than a mentor who doesn't want to help or worse, sabotage Twelve tributes chances of survival.

Jarius - This dude smirks way too much and it's a bit inserting - which I guess is the point. Dakota, for me, sounds a bit out of it, like, going with the flow. Jarius seems to want to toy with Dakota for a bit, maybe get to know the competition. I also have a feeling that's he's a bit of a sadist.

Dakota - Ahhh, if hunting so much gets him in trouble so much, Dakota should probably get a new hobby. As for Gabriel... Well, I'm never a fan of owning a favor to another human being so I'm not sure what Gabriel could possibly want from him.

Minerva - Ellis is bitter, Heather is a daredevil, and Minerva is bitter too along with I'm trusting - which is good, she shouldn't be in the Capitol. It was a depressing(courtesy of Ellis and Minerva) and humourous(Heather's fault really) POV at once. It was a cool chapter tho.

Also, thanks for accepting my character! Kinda regretting calling my character Jina tho, oh well, too late for that. XD
8/21/2020 c3 5Axe Smelling God
Laurel- it was nice to have a look into the eyes of these victors. I love getting to see the world building through their eyes and what you’re giving us from the looks that these tributes have and what we are able to look at form the way they’re interacting with them. This is such a great thing to see and I can’t wait to see what you have in store for Laurel with her tributes.

Jarius- I can see that he has a little sass to him with the way that he’s reacting to these new victors. It interesting to see that he actually sees the ploy that the Capitol has with them even when the tributes are done with them. This is something that I can find funny and that’s interesting.

Dakota- I see that she means well and that she is looking out for everyone and that she has a lot to say for the way that these tributes and the wya that these tributes are reacting to the way that they’re being reacted to the wya that they choose to be the way that are like this.

I want to say thank you so much for accepting Lior for me and I can’t wait to see what you do with her.
8/20/2020 c3 24CelticGames4
This was a very interesting dive into the psyche of the Victors in your verse! It's good that many of them seem healthy and rational, and also that they are getting to bond and know each other as well. It really seems like their first priority is the tributes that they are mentoring, and the various philosophies and mentoring styles gave us some serious metacognition there. Guess now is the time to see if Dakota can step up to the plate! I like how it's a D2 mentor that is giving him advice: in any other story that is post-Careers this definitely wouldn't be a thing but here it can be so that's a nice touch.
Excited that you took Dodge and I can't wait to see what you have in store for all these characters!
6/12/2020 c2 CelticGames4
I really like the ambiences you guys were able to create in these little POVs, especially Dakota's with the snow and the hunting. I like how each of these personalities are so different, and how they cope with their Victories in different ways through different activities. These are really unique characters and a really smooth chapter, I love the flow you achieve.
I am anxious to see the tribute list and hope you get to fill out the rest of your cast!
6/11/2020 c2 22District11-Olive
I enjoy the idea of exploring the early Victors some more so I was happy to read this chapter. Dakota trying to return to his normal life was great, though I could feel the heaviness of his interactions with his friends. He seems to be handling everything decently well considering and he's gotten some idea of the privilege he has as a Victor now.

Keeping busy is a good thing and the little setup with his shop is probably extremely helpful for Ellis. I like seeing all of them get back into 'normal' lives yet there are still interruptions from the Capitol and their memories from the HG to deal with. This was a very sweet section and played to one nice part of the HG for the poor tributes- having some luxury.

Another very interesting direction, where the others almost ignore their time in the HG and want to forget, Heather seems to almost embrace it. She appears to need the adrenaline that probably kept her going in the arena even now that she's out. Must be hard on the parents to have to see so many changes in their kids, but it's kind of true that Heather should be allowed to do whatever helps.

It's always heart-breaking to read about the mentor's thoughts on their dead mentees. Like obviously there is sadness, especially for Amber who has only mentored for a year, but eventually I'm sure they get numbed to it. She seems to have a special place in her heart for Jacinth and I hope that she can move onto her next two tributes but I wonder if she will be able to.

Do we get to hear about this Capitol party? I feel like that would be really cool considering it seems to be a pretty big deal. Regardless, another great introductory chapter and I look forward to more. Best of luck getting submissions, we all feel that struggle. Until next time!
6/11/2020 c1 District11-Olive
I like seeing that this chapter was written a while before the 11th HG because I hardly see prologues that explore what happens immediately after a tribute wins. That is usually reserved for epilogues but I liked it a lot here. There is already a lot of drama and that makes sense as the HG are still so new that they must be figuring out some kinks.

Overall a very good prologue but if I can offer one critique it would be to avoid introducing so many new names in such a short period. It makes it a little bit difficult to keep everyone's roles straight. Perhaps consider having less characters in future prologues or possibly spending more time introducing who is who. That's all :)

I look forward to the start of the story regardless of if my tribute is accepted. I love early games, there is so much to play with.
6/8/2020 c2 4BradiLain
Dakota's POV was a nice one - I feel like a hunting scene was a good place to meet with him. It was serene enough to give us quite a bit of time with his thoughts, which was a good way to get to know him a little bit better. It was also a very pleasant surprise that his POV wasn't filled with information and history of his games. He seems like an odd one to be a victor, which makes me curious to get more details of his games and victory.

Ellis was a really sweet POV too, helping the less fortunate. It's always nice to see people getting back to some semblance of normal after the arena. I can't imagine trying to go back home as if I didn't watch death and destruction with my own eyes. Crazy, crazy world to be in. I like how the bell caught him off guard - it's the little details and the little things that Victors do that are sometimes more interesting that having really thick, obvious traumas, i think.

Heather, the little thing, I see the symbolism here. I see what you did there. Lol. She's out here running away from her problems, and I sympathize heavily with her. Out of the four of them, she was probably the one that seemed the most bothered by the games, so it was a nice change of pace from the two men before her. I think her mother seemed sweet too, which is always welcome. I hate watching characters constantly hate on and badmouth their parents all of the time. Give me the caring mommas and the supportive dads - that's what I'm here for.

Jasmine was the perfect end to the little quartet of victors, I think, and she was for sure my favorite one out of the four. I think that the Career districts usually get shafted on their victors, but in a world like yours, where the Careers aren't really Careers, it's a lot easier to shine a more sympathetic life on District 1. It's an interesting blend of grey in a world where nothing is black and white - five deaths for her to support so many children back home. I think it's precious and makes her stand out as almost a martyr among the other victors.

Great chapter ~ I hope that you can fill up your roster and get your games started soon! Your writing is wonderful, and you do a good job of setting the tone for each scene as they go through. It's a joy to read!
6/8/2020 c2 5AlexFalTon
Dakota: Dudes the most recent Victor and well, him being a hunter is pretty cool, but not exactly ideal. Then again, the Capitol seems to be pretty controlling with his schedule.

Ellis: So, he likes sewing...kinda stereotypical if it's District 8, but that guy means well. And if making clothes and handing him out makes him happy, then why stop him? Dude can get a nice hobby.

Heather: Open a theme park or a parkour gym then if you want some minor danger and fun! Don't climb a roof! Yeah, she's a daredevil, it appears or has an adrenaline rush syndrome that many daredevils have - I think I just said the same thing twice. I mean, I don't think she's a bad person, but probably not a good mentor for kids.

Amber:...Not much was shown in her as a character, mostly just that she survived. She's nice. Whatever, her not being a career is a plus, I guess.
6/7/2020 c2 5Axe Smelling God
This was a beautifully written chapter as always and it was nice seeing the current victors loving their own independent lives outside of these games and we get our very own glimpse into this and I can’t wait to see more from them.
6/3/2020 c1 21Firedawn'd
Okayyyy, so there's so much to break down here! First of all, the writing was absolutely amazing; I had such a clear mental image of what was going on, and the political/Games-related manoeuvring never got confusing at all. The fact that this is a collab will be so interesting; it's always fun to see the ways in which writing style can add to each other, as well as the various flavours of writing that'll come through! Onwards to the premise...

I'm so intrigued by everything that's going on politically regarding the Games. /Especially/ with the Capitol's almost desire to even out the Victors of each Games, in a way, I think - the fact that Dakota's victory makes Gabriel say "just leaves two Districts stuck with some of us now"... and the fact that they're so focused on finding an adequate District 12 replacement is so interesting to me... if we take the idea of the Games and Victors as a sort of "hope" for the Districts and ascribe that here, it makes sense. Especially with the in-verse situation with D12 - with whatever the hell Warrick has done which had instilled D12 with so much resentment... which I'm! omg you've piqued my curiosity so much and the fact that she'd wanted to mentor D12? Like seriously I agree with Gryffin, wtf why? :') Her motives are so unusual and intriguing, and really makes me want to learn more about her as a character.

Laurel! I can't wait to see more of her. She /definitely/ stood out to me on the weebly whilst scrolling through the Victors page, and the fact that she's a relative of the president makes things so very more entrancing... and also dangerous. The thing about Laurel needing to keep her heritage shut is also quite foreboding... I can't wait to see what she'll bring as a mentor.

Anyway, I'm so excited for this fic! Especially with the so incredibly dynamic (and diverse!) group of mentors/Victors - like, I'm so intrigued by Minerva /especially/, somebody with Capitol heritage and having experienced the Games? Gosh I just. :'D I've submitted two tributes over... I really can't wait to see how everything'll turn out, regardless of acceptance or not. :D Thank you so much for writing!
6/2/2020 c1 23symphorophilia
bit late getting around to this one, but i'm here now!

very interesting prologue; the political intrigue in just the set up spells out conflict between some of the games' primary authorities and the districtsfolk, which isn't really a surprise given the scar of the war is still so recent/raw for a lot of people... am curious as to what exactly warrick's plan was in her willingness to jump into the fray by taking up the mentorship spot in twelve though. naturally, there's a reason for twelve to dislike anyone the capitol sends as a mentor, but it seems like there's some personal vitriol directed at our dear vice president here... hmm. and now that the council has effectively scorned her for speaking up on the matter it sounds like they're expecting some sort of retaliation from her... she's formidable enough that her own colleagues are cautious of her but still wields a great degree of power. "could've swayed the vote any way she liked?" i mean... wow.

laurel seems like a decent choice for mentor. young, eager to make a name for herself and leave a mark on the world as an individual outside of her familial legacy...

so "sponsorships" came about as a fluke that resulted from internal meddling? that's a neat little lore tidbit... excited to see how this is fleshed out later and what impact it has on the way the pregames stuff is set up. i know on the form it mentioned that interviews and the idea of playing to the crowd is a bit new so i'll be curious to see how this backstory to sponsoring and some of the experimental facets of the games in general impact the narrative (especially with it being such an early games!)

anyway, really looking forward to following along with this project and seeing what you've got in store for us! collaborative work is a lot of fun and it'll be interesting to see how the writing styles mesh/play off one another here. excited for this story - hope you're doing well.
5/30/2020 c1 24CelticGames4
Hi, I've never been involved in your stories but I really want to! I've heard great things so knowing that you had this open, I definitely wanted to get involved!
I like how you introduced this cast of characters: there were a lot of them, but by the end of the chapter I could remember who was who and had a good feel for the verse this is in. I hope to make a sub for you soon!
5/18/2020 c1 4BradiLain
What an interesting little premise we've got going on. I like a lot of these characters so far - we got enough of them coming in and out that I feel like I've got a basis for them to grow on to learn more about them. I always enjoy capitol chapters from the perspective of victors/mentors - it's intriguing to have so many people in the same boat with such diverse backgrounds, I think. Digging into their histories and their games will be a nice way to spend a few chapters before we get the tributes themselves.

Having such an early game is also a nice idea. Things aren't as rehearsed, which leaves a lot of room for more interesting tribute alliances and nuances. We won't just have a typical career pack or a victor's child trying to gain glory or anything like that; definitely a plus. Haha.

My only critique is how many characters we introduced in this chapter. It can be a little bit overwhelming as a reader to have so many names and personalities without enough time to really grasp them. But! It's a bridge we have to cross eventually with so many people to introduce and so little time. Overall, great chapter, great introduction!
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