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for I Lost Her Once

11/2 c15 Guest
Interesting.
10/30 c15 11marati2011
Cheer up, Eric
10/30 c15 6Axantur
Quite a nice chapter. I hadn't considered that Eric would also be unable to breath in the surface air, given that Ariel can, even as a mermaid, but then again, he's not been transformed into a merperson, just a human who can breathe underwater. Now, this makes for an interesting problem, in that there appears to be no way that he will be able to once again breathe the surface air. Along with other biological non-adaptations of the human body to the sea that merfolk presumably have (e.g., cold, water resistance of the skin, parasite and worm resistance, etc.), this could make his new life with Ariel under the sea quite short.

Eric's perspective was quite interesting too, as he got a taste of what Ariel went through to be with him. Just a taste though, as only his lungs and circulatory system were involved. (i.e., he didn't have half of his body ripped open and reformed).

I'm looking forward to seeing what surrounds them.
10/30 c15 KathyMesser
So Eric finally drank the potion. I think Eric under the sea will be like Ariel on land. He'll be fascinated by everything. Still wondering what the price will be. Can't wait for the next chapter. Please update soon.
10/29 c15 rincemermaid
Change him to his and has to had
10/29 c15 kit-kat74
Excited for the update but there is a formatting issue that needs to be fixed.
10/29 c15 Guest
Please fix your formatting because the chapter is unreadable as is.
10/7 c14 rincemermaid
Please update
9/30 c14 83lalalei
I just found this story and I love how in-depth it is! It's so great seeing an extended visit to Eric's kingdom. I hope Ariel's sisters are okay. If the original tale is any indication they might try a deal with Ursula too D: I wonder how Ariel and Eric will save the kingdom!
9/23 c2 IcyImagination
I love your line: "But neither of them was to blame for the things this sea witch had done.". Too true that you shouldn't blame yourself for things you have no control over.
9/13 c14 Guest
Nice chapter, enjoyed reading it.
9/12 c14 Clarisse1560
Very interesting premise with a strong start so far. The two most notable aspects so far are Ariel mentioning that Triton's merfolk do eat other creatures, and the introduction of land-based mages. Only a handful of TLM fics address the former, and this is the only fic I've seen that acknowledges the latter (excluding fics set in the OUAT-verse and Disney xovers).

The development of Eric and Ariel's relationship is natural, and I also quite liked Ariel's growing friendships with Carlotta, Grimsby and the guards.
9/11 c14 Guest
It is possible Eric can try constructing swimming bifins or monofins as his swimming speed will leave him helpless against most native sea creatures. It is possible using cord and stiff fabric, and he has seen Ariel's tail for inspiration. Even though the performance will be inferior compared to IRL modern materials, it could help.
9/11 c14 6Axantur
Hi Rhine,

I will be trying to catch up on earlier chapter reviews after this.

One of the fascinating elements of this story, these past couple of chapters, has been Ariel’s relationship with her guards. For the first time in her life, she’s probably thankful for having them, and is probably drawing upon her interactions with her father’s palace guards in the past, but … maybe not. Maybe she just has a natural "winningness" (or is it instead "winsomeness") that helps her work with them. As stated, they rehearsed this before beginning the fountain square venture, and it was indeed a good yet still risky attempt to win human acceptance of her. It also appears to have been a partial success, as she seems to have a lot of people who did not seem threatened by her (or who were just very curious and trusted this mysterious, beautiful young mermaid, still a girl yet also a young (mer-) woman.

It was interesting how the guard who was carrying her seemed to be intentionally suppressing any visible though, emotion, or interest in his young charge. Grimsby or Carlotta’s doing, I surmise. Another possibility is that we don’t really know this man’s feelings to her. He may be simply doing as directed. On the other hand, he wouldn’t want to make her uncomfortable or impose upon Eric’s (apparent) young princess, mermaid though she may be. Perhaps we saw a hint of his inner thoughts when he stumbled upon her title.

Their discussion about the potion, its effects and Eric’s ascension to the throne upon marriage (to her!) was beautifully written and evocative. It will be interesting to see how Eric can help her, but it was telling when she noted how her every moment in the sea was dangerous to her, and forced her to hide. The oddness is that Eric’s palace is probably the safest place for her, maybe in a bathtub much of the time, but at least there would be no sharks and no hostile townsfolk, there would be food, warmth, … and Eric.

And crises ... like the one for which Eric is called away at the end of this chapter.

Great chapter Rhine, and very suspense-building for what comes next.

-Axantur
9/11 c14 KathyMesser
I can't wait for Eric to take that potion. He will probably experience the same treatment under the sea as Ariel experiences on land. I wonder what the price will be. Whatever it is they are not going to like it. Can't wait for the next chapter.
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