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for She's My Blackberry Pie

22h c46 Renee Aubin
After describing their lovely daily routine – which they both would have thought impossible a year ago – Bella admits this:
‘Somehow, without my noticing it, time was starting to slip by.’
Oof. It happens to all of us, but would be most noticeable to someone who has negotiated her own deadline for the end of this phase of their life.

Enjoyed the story about their disagreements about Edward doing all the cleaning. (A disagreement 99% of human-partnered people would be THRILLED to have.)
A stellar image: ‘Edward's yellow, latex-covered hands flailed in exasperation.’

Ha ha, then Edward turns his help Shakespeare study into “strip tutoring”. Good one. I enjoyed the Shakespeare quotes themselves, too.

‘"I like this game!" My greedy eyes raked over him with the subtlety of a construction worker. "What happens when I get you naked?"
Edward smiled wickedly. "If you have to ask, I must not be doing it right," he quipped.’

I loved her comeback of turning his music composition assignment into an exercise in concentration. Chuckle:
‘Oh for the love of all that was holy! My most cherished possession (if you could call her that) was between my legs and my second most cherished possession was beneath my hands. If I wanted them both undamaged, I would have to concentrate harder than I'd ever needed to before.’

A good reminder of how impossibly careful he must be: ‘…the soft warmth of the back of her throat, fragile as a spider web…’

How nice that Edward appreciates the subtlety and complexity of her challenge:
‘I concentrated on keeping my lower body frozen to the piano bench, feet planted to the floor, while also keeping my hands soft on the keys.
What a brilliant exercise it was to be able to practice keeping a soft touch under the intensely pleasurable attentions of her mouth while she was, for the most part, safely away from my hands.’

Chuckle: ‘…a cacophony of right notes, wrong notes, high-pitched whines, and throaty groans.’

Then he thinks of yet another way to raise the stakes on his tutoring! Well done.

And damn! Yuummmmm…

I laughed at your author’s note, ‘So sorry to those of you who wanted to read about the convo between Edward and Alice…’ Well I DID want to hear that conversation, but somehow I forgot all about it the moment the uh, quizzing started. You do know your audience!
2/4 c13 3NoWayWithWords
Gah! Holy hell that was smoking hot! When they finally go at it in person something’s catching fire!

Seriously, I LOVE this Edward and Bella, once they put their insecurities aside and start communicating! I love a feisty Bella, and an Edward who’s not afraid to show a touch of his naughty side!

So happy I found this story, on to the next chapter!
1/29 c45 Renee Aubin
A good perspective, re the anniversary of Edward’s desertion:
“It's deplorable of me to say this to you, of all people, but that day was traumatic for me, too.”

I’m glad Bella gets it: ‘The memory of that dark time, whenever it resurfaced, was like Jane living in his head, mentally zapping him to his knees.’

Good compromise: ‘So if Edward needed a dark day, he could have it, but I refused to sit here and pick at old wounds when everything was going so right.’

This is good too: ‘"He's having a hard time? Well, that's rich," Alice snorted, unimpressed, as she pulled up the seat next to me.’
And she’s not done: “He didn't listen, and he's not the only one who thought they lost you. We almost lost both of you because of his pigheadedness."

That’s quite an inventory of ‘the very worst of my memories’ of those days. And then all the ways he came close to losing her forever. Yikes.

What a good image: ‘You'd think if I'd learned anything it was that nothing good came from us being apart, and here I was on this of all days tumbling around the Atlantic Ocean like a forgotten message in a bottle.’
And ‘sinking in a literal sea of my own despair’.

Well this ought to be very interesting, Alice getting to have her say about Edward’s worst choice.
1/23 c44 Renee Aubin
At least your Alice knows when to back off:
“I'm not a total tyrant. It's your birthday. Wear what you feel good in.”

Funny: ‘…taking in the gaudy blood-red room from my seat at the table in an adjacent corner.
It was probably the bedroom Bella expected me to have when she first visited our house in Forks…’

I liked Jasper’s helpful breakdown of the issues Edward will face with Bella’s change.
Especially this point:
‘Didn't Carlisle tag along on your honeymoon without her knowing?
I gritted my teeth. "He was 40 miles away in Rio!" I hissed.
My point is that she didn't know.’

Makes sense: "I was reading in the brochure that this used to be a brothel back around the time the furniture was in style.”
It would explain the, uh, aggressive decorating choices.

What a good detail: ‘…patting the glass wall of the shower stall with the barest of pressure but still producing the soft clink of stone on glass.’

"You've mentioned that there are things that you don't want to forget, so I thought that you could use a journal to write them down. And I hope you don't mind, but I filled out some of the pages myself. Of the things that I remember that I hope you never forget."
And “I've loved every minute I've ever spent with you, and there's your proof!"

Go, Bella: “It is my birthday. I'm a consenting adult, and I demand to have some drunken sex with my smokin' hot husband.”
Way to set expectations.

Has nobody warned Bella about the drawbacks of mixing different liquors? Maybe the Cullens don’t know!

Chuckle, when Edward describes the pool-shooting stance:
"It's how you play," I chuckled. "I don't know how to make that not sound dirty."
"I wish you wouldn't try."

Fun, when Bella seems to deliberately win Jasper’s bet:
‘"I think you just got hustled, babe," Rosalie raised her beer appreciatively in Bella's direction and pretended to drink.’
Enjoyed Emmett’s gripe later: “You're all a bunch of gifted cheaters."

Nice, Bella to Edward, re his prediction that she'll be steadier after her change:
"I doubt my hands will ever be steady around you."

Cute: ‘"You're a little bossy when you've been drinking, you know that?" I called teasingly to her retreating back.’

Oh, yes, the Cullen boys doing an *NSync number – perfect!

Ha ha: ‘Edward grinned, pretending to crack his knuckles. "Let's see if I can remember how to stop at second base. It's been a while," he chuckled.
"Second base? Well now you're being generous," I teased some more.’
She’s absolutely right!

What a brat:
‘And then he was gone, suddenly laying next to me on the bed, with his hands folded behind his head, a beatific smile on his face.
"Sufficiently bothered, Mrs. Cullen?" His smirk was positively sinful.’
Well, he’s certainly going to get his cold shower performance.

But THIS is not funny:
‘The old feelings of frustration resurfaced, acute to the point of pain, as I remembered all those times he sighed and pushed me away.’
Not just frustrating but humiliating. I hated every one of those times in canon.

Oh goodness, Bella’s hatching a plan of her own: ‘But one day soon I was going to make him know just what it felt like to be left wanting.’

Oh yumm: ‘… I felt a stone-cold hand, pry my fingers away from my aching need and replace them with his mouth.’

Good to know: ‘"You don't know how badly I wanted to do that the first time you rage-showered on me," he chuckled…’

Hot and sweet – well done!
1/16 c43 Renee Aubin
True, re Bella’s birthday:
‘It seemed almost impossible to believe that just one year ago today, I had set into motion the plan to leave her. Three days from now would mark the anniversary of that blackest of all days.’

Nicely said:
‘It was still a mystery to me that I had managed to foul up everything so completely, and yet here she was...sharing my bed, my name, my life.’

Sigh, such a sweet way to start the day:
‘I opened my arms to her, as I did every morning, and she crawled into my lap.
We'd kiss good morning, and I'd hold her quietly or we'd speak in hushed tones about everything and nothing for a few moments, and then she'd affectionately pat me twice on the shoulder, hop off my lap, and we'd go our separate ways until breakfast.’

Good Lord, Emmett with the ketchup: ‘"I call you Squirt cause every time I see you, you're bleeding!" He threw his head back and roared in laughter…’

Good for Bella, in response to Edward’s judgmental question about boy bands:
"I'm a millennial. And a girl. Find me a '90s girl that doesn't have a strong preference between *Nsync and the Backstreet Boys, and I'll show you a damned dirty liar."
It's not just frat boy she's learning to stand up to!

I agree that getting drunk at home by herself with all the Cullens watching does NOT sound like fun.

Good girl: ‘"I'm gonna make you take a shot with me," I warned. They all were going to take a shot with me, and I didn't care if they had to throw it back up. I was not going to drink or vomit alone.’

Loved this line: "Try not to do anything too badass when I'm not looking."

She really is making the most of the opportunities to practice:
‘Though I was sort of dreading bumping into frat-bro.
I squared my shoulders walking into class. Cullens never cowered.’

Nice: ‘…I couldn't decide whether to be mad and throw a fit or to burst into a fit of giggles at the hilarity of having a bubble-wrapped birthday in a family of vampires who had already gone to such great lengths to keep me alive. I chose the latter.’

Wow, Alice did a great job with the birthday video, including Charlie and Renee. And Jasper’s hand-carved chess set was perfect. (As was Emmett’s coupon book.)

Excellent, when Bella asks to hug Jasper, Edward thinks:
‘I didn't have to read Jasper's thoughts to understand the look of pure determination on his face. I knew it well.
I had looked much the same when I was determined to make a connection with this shockingly brave, utterly different human girl.’

Great line: "Can we please go unleash a drunken Bella on Canada now?”
1/9 c42 Renee Aubin
What a fun incident when Bella gets to practice her “Cullen façade” on the misogynistic frat boy in her class!
I especially enjoyed this detail: ‘I tried my best to look down my nose at someone who stood a foot taller than me.’

And her professor awards points for Gryffindor! This is nice:
‘The triumphant look on her face was one I wouldn't have wanted to miss for the world.’
And Edward’s conclusion: ‘…being a fly on the wall for that brief window into Bella's day was a sorely needed reminder that this time was a worthwhile risk.’
To me, there’s so much to be said for letting her grow up a bit.

Edward re her professor:
"Bella," I said, waiting for her to look at me. "She was utterly dazzled. And so was I."

OK, this made me frown, re their new “meadow”: ‘And best of all, nothing was green.’ I will always love the PNW’s endless green conifers. Deciduous forests in the winter are downright depressing. However Edward seems to have found this one at its spectacular peak.

Cute, amid the shower of falling red leaves:
‘"If this is what you meant by showering me in admiration, then consider me impressed," I said dreamily, as I wrapped my fingers around a crimson leaf that had fallen onto Edward's chest.’

I’m glad you included this:
‘I froze involuntarily as his words reminded me of something James had said in the ballet studio.
That close-call felt like it was another lifetime ago, but still, every now and again, something would take me back to that day.’
Flashbacks like that have to show up from time to time, after the terror she went through.

‘"Wasn't it your original plan for us to be together as virgins until I died? How did you see that going?" I teased, with a lazy, satisfied smile.
"If I love a ridiculous woman, then you love a sometimes-idiotic man," he said chuckling wryly. "God, was that ever a terrible plan," Edward shook his head, laughing at himself.’

There’s something perfect about this description: ‘I whined and bucked at his teasing…’

‘…coaxing me with deliciously dirty words in my ear.’ Truly delicious!

Whew, what an excellent (series of) lemons. I'd say they properly baptized their new meadow.

Liked the Johnny Carson joke, too.
1/3 c41 Renee Aubin
Understatement of the century:
‘Bella's birthday was coming up, the first one since we'd been married, and the last birthday didn't exactly go so well.’

Aww: ‘It was such a simple, everyday moment, Bella brightening my doorway.’
It's nice to see Edward appreciating the small moments, rather than always focusing on the grand gestures.

Fun take on effortless composing: ‘I didn't need to consciously think about the notes when I did this. It was sort of like...talking in my sleep.’

I always love when Bella is curious about Edward’s history:
“Tell me about the first time you enrolled in school as a vampire. What was that like for you?"
Canon Bella seemed appallingly apathetic about it.

A welcome bit of family history:
“[Esme] had a very hard life, and being turned into a vampire doesn't...fix the parts of you that are broken on the inside. She and Carlisle did that work together...Let's just say, it was for the best that Jasper didn't join the family until much later.”
It would certainly have been hard on Edward, though.

Clever: "School was Carlisle's idea. We were growing weary of the nomadic life, and he thought hiding in plain sight was the most feasible course of action if we wanted to stay in one place for any amount of time.”
Hiding in plain sight, good description.

Another good family history detail: ‘…to earn spending money, long before Alice's talents made us wealthy.’

Chuckle: “… it took Emmett longer to control his strength than it did to control his thirst. Let's just say, classmates were hospitalized in the process of Emmett learning to perfect his role."
And “You'd be amazed by the damage you can do with a basketball.”

Interesting: "I did-do-have compassion for Rosalie, but she wanted me to love her even though she had no intention of loving me back. I suppose you could say I found that offensive."

Cute, Bella not wanting to take of her wedding ring when they eventually go back to high school: "First I couldn't get it on you, and now you won't take it off."

‘I had meant to get back to [Renee] days ago but hadn't gotten around to it, what with all the amazing sex I couldn't seem to stop having. I smirked, considering her reaction if I told her that. She'd probably be thrilled for me.’
So why doesn’t she tell her? Maybe she’s afraid once she opens that door there will be no way to close it again!

Ah, yes, the rolling ladder. How disappointing when it runs out of momentum so quickly! I’m thinking one of the Cullens could fix that.

Duh! ‘“…you could have at least fed her lunch”…
Alice grimaced and cursed under her breath. "I wish the girl would learn to speak up," she rolled her eyes.’

That’s a tough decision whether to pop her shoulder back in. In the end she seems to choose having Carlisle do it. After he does,
‘"Thank you," I breathed…
"I'd say 'Anytime,' but you might take that too literally," he teased.’

I’d have been so disappointed in Edward if he DIDN’T immediately think of this:
"But there are plenty of things we can do without straining your shoulder."

Laughed out loud at Emmett’s take on the “how many days without an accident” board.
12/27/2022 c40 Renee Aubin
Of course this is your story to tell your way, but I’m never comfortable where canon Bella does the abrupt Sandy transformation from Grease, at least in public. In my mind that would stay between her and Edward. I can sure see Rosalie (and to some extent Alice) coming up with this idea, though.

A good detail: ‘…I could see what she was wearing, not only with my own eyes but through the eyes of every man within view of her…’
I was impressed that he does manage ‘not to stuff her right back into the coat’. An earlier version of Edward might have done just that.

Clever: ‘…I repeated the words she'd used the first time we'd sat in the school cafeteria together. "Well, this is different."’

Good line: ‘She was angry with me? What fresh hell was this?’

It was especially grueling when one of the bystanders listened in on their conversation and incorporated his own reply to Bella in his thoughts. Ugh.

Wow: ‘If I had to listen to one more person think my wife a slut, our adventure to Dartmouth would be over, tonight.’
I can’t imagine this is the kind of obstacle Edward ever anticipated from their college life!

Oh, good point, Bella:
"You're going to have to explain to me why you think I can handle of you," she said, lowering her voice, "but you don't think I can handle the inconvenient realities that go along with that”.
Well, to be fair, I’m not convinced he DOES think she can handle becoming a vampire.

The perfect answer, and true so often: ‘I sighed. "Because I have a bad habit of underestimating you," I said with brutal honesty.’

I was surprised when Edward expected an apology from Bella in return. But of course he was right.
"This isn't you. Taking me to that place and using my gift against me like that? That was just spiteful. And I've never known you to be a spiteful person."

Great line, when she attritubes the idea to Rosalie:
"There's a very good reason why I fell in love with you and not Rosalie."

"We've talked a lot about ways I could be better about respecting your boundaries. And in the equal relationship that you're always aspiring for, respecting boundaries goes both ways. And that—" I pointed in the direction of the other restaurant, "can never happen again."
I’m glad to see Edward setting his own boundaries, too. He’s exactly right that she used his gift as a weapon against him.

Nice: ‘As much as I hated fighting with Edward, there was something so bolstering about working through a conflict and coming out stronger on the other side.’
Yes, like actual grownups.

I bet it was satisfying for Edward to destroy that dress with his own hand.

Sweet: "Do you know why I chose these bed linens, love? Because the color reminds me of the towel you were lying on that day on the beach.”
What a great marker of how far they’ve come, that now he feels confident to do whatever it was he was tempted to do that day.

Yes! ‘"If you're going to wear fuck-me shoes, be prepared for the consequences," he grinned.’

Clever: "My piano is going to get lonely because that is far and away my new favorite pastime."

‘"How? How are you so good at that, too? You have just as much experience in that department as I do." It almost sounded like a complaint.
"Bella," he beamed, shaking his head a little as if I were missing something obvious. "I'm a vampire. That's what I do. I suck and I know things."
I laughed until it hurt, with him rolling right beside me.’

A lovely thing to discover, isn’t it?
"But seeing what I do to you is almost as pleasurable as being on the receiving end of it.”
And surely she gets now that it’s true for him too.

Wonderful: ‘I made a little game with myself, seeing which touches made the pitch of his velvety voice climb to a high, desperate whine, and which touches made his voice drop down low in the back of his throat as he groaned in satisfaction.’
I enjoyed that she insisted “they aren't called 'make-love-to-me shoes.'"

I think this is one of the best-imagined and described lemons I’ve read! Maybe because it's so specific to Edward and Bella. Well done.
12/19/2022 c39 Renee Aubin
Now that’s a fun idea, taking off for a day trip with Alice and Rosalie. Esme was smart not to come, at least this time.

Excellent: ‘"But when we dress you up like black-leather Sandy from Grease, and Edward loses his mind, you have to promise to say, "Tell me about it, stud." Rose cackled conspiratorially…’

Good for Carlisle: "Your difficulties are never irrelevant, Edward."
He needs to hear that.

‘"Now that I've fully accepted the inevitable, a semester of college has never seemed like such an eternity," I admitted with a rueful laugh.’
Especially ironic since he badgered Bella so hard to give him a year of college!

What a good topic to raise with Rosalie and Alice:
"So I have a question for you both," I asked as we sped across the New York state line. "What was Edward like before me? He never wants to talk about himself."

This really does sound like Edward: “…I can never forget that when I finally killed the men who hurt me, Edward was the one who disposed of the bodies. He didn't even say anything. He was just there, handling it."

I’ve always loved this detail:
“…when Edward rebelled from Carlisle, do you know who the first person he killed was?"
I frowned, "All he told me was that they were bad men."
Alice nodded gravely. "And the very first bad man was the one that beat Esme."

I really enjoyed this tie back to canon:
‘"What if I'm not the superhero, what if I'm the bad guy?"
Imagining him now as a furious angel driving around in fast cars, saving the city from violent scourges ... Perhaps I should've asked him if he had a butler named Alfred.’

That’s good that Edward shared that honeymoon story with his brothers. Who else can even imagine what that might have been like for him?
Emmett’s comment: ‘"You held out for a whole week? Impressive." Emmett nodded appreciatively.’

Uh oh, Rosalie spills the beans on Edward’s promise from Emmett, not to let Bella know the family can hear everything from their cottage.
Bella’s right: ‘"No cats! No bags! We're married. This is...this is bullshit," I raged.’
Seriously, after he made SUCH a big deal about getting married, it ought to mean something.

Oh boy, I’m thinking Edward is in for one uncomfortable dinner out!
12/13/2022 c39 BellaMendes
I'm loving the insight on Edward's character
12/13/2022 c38 BellaMendes
such a good quote "It's your body, it's never my place to tell you what to do with it"
12/13/2022 c37 BellaMendes
this is so beautiful
12/13/2022 c32 BellaMendes
this was amazing I'm glad they talked about it
12/13/2022 c30 BellaMendes
I can't tell you how relieved I am that there's not Renesmee to worry about, I love your Edward and Bella and their playfulness and it made me really disappointed when it abruptly came to a stop the moment Bella got pregnant.
12/12/2022 c38 Renee Aubin
Hopeful for Charlie’s future: ‘Bella's smile was heartwarming as she listened to Charlie talk with surprising verbosity about the boy who would be his step-son if Alice's vision held true.’

Ooh, good catch: ‘I moved my hand toward her chin so that I could see her face, but stopped myself, placing it on her knee instead.’
He took Carlisle’s observation seriously!

Huh, I don’t know whether canon Edward ever understood this:
“But it's your body, Bella. It's never my place to tell you what to do with it."
Although maybe I’m not being fair to him?

Nice: "Who needs drugs when I have you? You kiss me and it's like I can't think straight and all of a sudden my clothes start falling off."

Excellent: ‘It wasn't hard to imagine that she wielded complete power over me within the tip of her finger. She did.’

‘I pulled my shirt over my head but had less patience for the boxer briefs.’
Ha ha, he’s destroying his OWN clothes for a change!

Loved this: "You're just stealing my lines left and right, aren't you?"
She really did, and at perfect times!

Fun: ‘For the love of all that was holy, how was I supposed to say no to that when her hands were wrapped around my - "Slowly, Bella," I cautioned severely. "And if I say stop-"
"I'll jump halfway across the room, Edward-style," she quipped. I narrowed my eyes at her. The sass on this one!’

‘"Let me see your eyes," she breathed. I lifted my head and gazed down at her. She was right, it would be easier to stay in control if I was looking at her.’
I don’t think that’s exactly what she had in mind, Edward…

Wonderful: ‘I was as enthusiastic of a guinea pig as a person could be, moaning, whining, and panting at her attentions.’
Good for him, so great for her confidence. And I imagine for him it was a good exercise in letting go.

Good words: "Jesus, Bella," I panted, placing a hand over my chest. "Is my heart beating again? I think you just breathed life back into me."

Ha ha: "I think people might have been worshipping the wrong book all these years…”
Well, the colonial powers anyway…

Lovely: ‘…the relaxed cadence of her heartbeat-the metronome of my existence.’

Interesting: ‘Bella shook her head. "I'm not trying to form any new relationships while I'm here, Edward. It's going to be hard enough to leave behind the people I already know.”’
She’s taking her future seriously, considering what it’s going to be like - good to see. But it’s not easy for Edward: ‘…trying not to dwell on the bleakness in her voice.’

Good one: "why would I join a sorority when Emmett already hazes me right here at home?"

I’m glad you gave her this: ‘Rosalie was self-aware enough to know when her vanity was getting the best of her.’
After all these decades, she has grown up a bit.

Re Alice’s shopping trip:
‘“I know she'd love it if you came."
"You wouldn't come?" Bella pouted.
What I wouldn't do for that pout. It was a welcome feeling to know that even though we now spent so much time together that she still craved my presence as much as I craved hers.’
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